I'd Steal Your Heart Before You Ever Heard A Thing
by smc-27
Summary: He's got a reputation that she just doesn't fit into, and yet he can't leave her alone. Everything's getting better for her, and he should let her have that. But it's not his fault she's stuck in his head. Puckleberry Finn
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:** A little Puckleberry Finn! This was meant to be a oneshot, but I can't stop writing it, so it's longer. It'll probably be around 10 chapters or so.

_Warning_: The first chapters will be heavier on the Rachel/Finn, but it's listed as a Puck/Rachel for a reason; I'm just setting the groundwork.

Picks up after Sectionals. Spoilers up to there. And I obviously don't own Glee.

**----**

In the days after everything comes out, Rachel clutches her books to her chest as she walks the halls, because as much as everyone's talking about those other three people, hers is always the fourth name in the mix.

She's the one who broke the news.

Finn has told her not to worry about it, that it's not her fault, and that he can't blame her for being honest. But there's something in his voice or his eyes that tells her that he wishes he didn't know at all.

She knows how to do a lot of things. She's _excellent_ at a lot of things, and her superb artistic talent is just the tip of the iceberg. That's not ego, it's just a fact. She's special, and she knows it.

The one thing she has no idea how to do is to mend a broken heart, a broken boy. Every time she sees him, it's the only thing she wants to do.

She's used to being called names. She's heard just about anything the miscreants at her school have the brainpower to come up with.

_'Slut'_ is a new one.

It's cruel and awful, and not even true, so she doesn't know why she's standing at her locker, struggling for breaths and trying to keep the tears out of her eyes. Maybe it's all just getting to her, the tension in glee and the sadness she sees in her friend's (friend_s'_?) eyes. Whatever it is, she tries to blend in, make herself invisible, and it feels like last year all over again, just trying to get through the day without feeling terrible.

She sees Dave Sommer walking down the hall with a smirk on his face and a cup in his hand, and she clenches her jaw so she doesn't start crying before he even hits her with the drink.

But before she knows what's happening, Puck is standing in front of her, talking to her about...she doesn't even know, she's not even paying attention, just looking at him and trying to figure out what he's doing. But Dave keeps walking down the hall, and Puck casts an angry look over his shoulder at the guy.

Puck doesn't say anything more to her, just nods once before walking away, and she realizes that he stood there and talked to her because he knew that if she was seen with him, no one would mess with her. His reputation might be pretty much out the window, but he'd still get physically violent with anyone who crossed him.

There's something Rachel really likes about knowing that he cares enough to want to keep her from a slushie assault.

When she gets to glee rehearsal, he's already there, sprawled out in a chair with his legs stretched at pretty much a 90 degree angle and his arm hooked over the back of the chair. She doesn't know how he can appear so disinterested, and then get up and sing the way he does.

She doesn't say anything, and he glances at her once, just quickly, and she thinks he's expecting her to give him some long-winded thank you or acknowledgment of his good deed.

Instead, she sits a few seats away from him, and she smiles when Finn walks into the room, and she stops thinking about Puck at all.

----

Finn comes over one day after school and, all nervously, asks for help with his English homework. Her dads smile and say hello, then remind her to keep her bedroom door open, and she thinks Finn blushes harder than she does.

She tries to help him understand The Grapes of Wrath, and she thinks he gets it. She thinks maybe he understood it before he even showed up, so she wonders why he's here in the first place. She figures that now that he's single and he's sought her out, the least she can do is ask why he's showing up at her house at 7:00 on a Wednesday.

"Finn, may I ask you something?"

He looks up from his book, his brow furrowed adorably, and she toys with the pillow in her lap. "Sure," he answers.

"It seems that you completely understand the Joads' struggle, and so I'm more than just a little curious as to why you're laying on my bed and talking about something you clearly don't need help with," she says. He looks guilty or something. (It's _really_ cute.)

"I just...wanted to see you," he confesses, shrugging his shoulder. "My house is really quiet when my mom works nights, and now that Quinn's staying with Terri..."

"I did not see that coming, by the way," she interrupts.

"Me neither. I guess she's making amends though."

"Quinn, or Terri?" she asks under her breath.

"I dunno. Both," he says. He sits up a little, and he's closer to her now. She finds it really hard to control her breathing when she can smell his cologne and his hand is so close to her thigh. "But I was just sitting at home and thinking about what I'd rather be doing, you know, instead of sitting there by myself, and..."

He gets all shy and she swears her heart beats out of her chest. "What?"

"All I could think of was you," he admits.

There's a moment or two where she thinks he's going to kiss her. She honestly thinks he's just going to lean forward and kiss her like she wants him to.

But he doesn't. He clears his throat awkwardly and looks down at his notes, then asks a question about the book (actually, the illustration on the cover of the book) and she plasters on a smile and answers him as though her heart isn't breaking.

----

Finn starts spending time at the Berry house two nights a week, when his mom works nights. Rachel's dads love him, and he's not so nervous around them anymore, not when they insist on making him dinner and snacks, and they don't drill him about his relationship with their daughter, and they don't scare the bejeezus out of him like Quinn's dad did.

Sometimes the four of them sit in front of the fireplace with hot chocolate, watching sitcoms or talking about things that Finn can actually weigh in on. Her dad is a big basketball fan, so they talk about the game, and Finn promises to reserve some tickets for the Berry's for his next game.

Rachel thinks that it's really sweet, the way Finn makes an effort with her parents. She's not a fool, and she knows how intimidating it can be, how awkward sometimes, that she's got two fathers. She thinks it says a lot about Finn that he acts completely normal around her dads.

She doesn't even realize she's let out the dreamy sigh until he laughs softly and looks at her. They're laying on her bed, a few feet of space and their school books between them, and she should be paying attention to math, not to him.

"What?" he asks with a smirk.

"Nothing," she says.

The only thing she ever lies about with him, is him. She doesn't want to push him, and she doesn't know how he feels about her in the wake of everything that's happened. She thinks he likes her, and for once, she plans on being patient until he figures out what to do with it.

He walks her to her classes, and they sit together at lunch. He doesn't sit with the football players anymore, and he doesn't care what anyone says about him, and she's proud of him for that. She likes that he's confident enough about his involvement with glee club to not care about other peoples' opinions.

(And yet, every once in a while, she'll look over to the 'popular' table and see Puck and Quinn talking, and she wonders if Finn's sitting next to her has more to do with that than it does anything else.)

But still. He sticks up for her when Kurt gets on her about her wardrobe choices, or when Mercedes gets on her about her song choices. He drives her home from school every once in a while, and they've gone to movies together.

He's probably the closest friend she's ever had.

She's walking down the hall one day after classes have let out, and it's a Tuesday, so there's no glee club practice. She's got her backpack slung over her shoulder, and she's going to go home, eat dinner, then Finn's coming over and they're going to watch a basketball game with her dads. It's not exactly her first choice of activities, but Finn always sits really close to her on the sofa, and he doesn't treat her like an idiot if she has to ask questions about the rules and stuff.

"Berry! Rachel!" she hears, paired with footsteps running behind her. "Wait up."

She turns around to see Puck rushing towards her, and she sets her jaw, prepared for whatever it is he's going to say to her. She's not really sure she wants to hear it. He hasn't been horrible to her lately. He hasn't really been anything to her. It's been weeks since his little...whatever that was at her locker, and they've barely spoken. She hasn't really had any complaints about that, since it's far better than the alternative (him torturing her every chance he gets.)

"Noah," she says, because she still calls him that when they're speaking one on one. And every time, he rolls his eyes. "What can I do for you?"

"Look, you're tight with Finn, right?" he asks needlessly.

"Excuse me? Tight?"

He rolls his eyes again. God, he wishes she'd just _get_ what he says. Just once. "Yeah. Friends. Or whatever it is you are." She notices a trace of bitterness in his voice, but she's sure that's all in her head. She shrugs her shoulder, and he's surprised she doesn't give him an earful, defining her relationship with Finn. It just seems like something she'd do. "I was just thinking you could talk to him."

"I do talk to him," she says.

"I mean about me," he specifies. He's almost smiling, because she's fucking impossible at the best of times. It doesn't drive him insane anymore. He's not exactly sure when that happened. "If you could talk to him about me."

"We talk about you all the time," she says, though it's a bit of an exaggeration. He just looks at her. "He's still unimpressed with you. You can't expect him to just forgive and forget. He may not be able to do either."

"Well, he listens to you," Puck admits quietly, his hands in his pockets as he looks to the floor. He can't believe he's asking her to do this. "No one else..."

"No one else listens to me."

He laughs and shakes his head at her. He doesn't know how someone so smart can be so clueless. "_He_ won't _listen_ to anyone else," he clarifies. "Jesus, _everyone_ listens to you. We can't help but listen to you."

"Are you insulting me or complimenting me?" she asks, and she's smiling, though she doesn't really want to.

"I dunno." He shrugs and she arches her brow. "Maybe both."

She laughs softly, looks away for a moment, and she can feel him smiling at her. She thinks this is probably the second serious conversation they've ever had, and he's winning her over far too easily. But what he's asking her to do is something she probably should have been doing all along. It's for the good of the group, the unity of glee club as they prepare for regionals. They need to all be working together, and they can't be at their best if Finn isn't talking to two of their members. It's been a concern of hers for quite some time, now, and in her discussions with Finn, he hasn't made mention that he's about to talk to either Puck or Quinn.

"I make no promises," she says. His grin gets a little bigger, almost a full smile, which is rare from him.

"Thanks, Berry," he says sincerely.

He winks at her before he walks away.

Finn's standing at the other end of the hall, watching the whole thing. She watches him leave without even saying a word to her.

----

By 7:00, she knows Finn isn't going to show. She's not exactly surprised. The look on his face was enough to tell her that. And he hasn't called her, and she knew he wouldn't.

So she knocks at his door, because she figures he can't ignore her this way, and as she's waiting for someone to answer, she realizes that she's never been to his house before. It's always her house they spend time at. She's not entirely sure why that is, but she finds that it bothers her.

His mother answers the door, and Rachel thinks it's weird that they've never been introduced. She's going to change that right now.

"Mrs. Hudson? I'm Rachel Berry," she says, extending her hand.

"Rachel, of course. It's nice to meet you," Mrs. Hudson says. She opens the door and gestures for Rachel to come in. "And call me Carole." Rachel smiles and slips off her shoes, suddenly very nervous to have just shown up unannounced. "Finn's up in his room. Come on. I'll show you the way."

"Thank you, Carole," Rachel says sweetly.

She looks around the house a little as she follows the path through the living room and towards the stairs. She catches sight of some photos, framed and hanging on the walls. It's clear that his mother is very sentimental. Rachel thinks his house is lovely. It's very homey and comfortable. She can't begin to understand why he wouldn't ever have invited her over.

The nerves build and build as she walks up the stairs. She's worried that he just doesn't want her here. Certainly not now, when he's clear he's already upset with her. Not that he has any real reason, since all she was doing was talking to Noah. She knows it'd be a sore spot with him, but he should know that there was nothing really going on.

"Finn, sweetie, there's someone here to see you," Carole says as she steps into the room.

Finn pauses his video game and looks over just in time to see Rachel walk into the room behind his mom. She's wringing her hands in front of her and smiling weakly at him, and she can tell he's more than a little surprised to see her there.

When it's just the two of them alone again, Rachel shuffles her feet, but she hasn't really been invited in, so she doesn't move towards him. He sits back a little on his bed and looks at her, and he decides she looks really pretty, her hair half pulled up (it wasn't like that at school) and her little skirt hitting her mid-thigh. She always looks pretty, though. Maybe it's just the fact that she's in his room that makes him think she looks even better now.

"You can come in, you know. If you want," he says. She smiles at him and steps forward, looking around before she sits down next to him. "Sorry I didn't..."

"Nothing's going on with me and Noah," she says, interrupting his apology, which she just knows would have been rocky and full of stuttering. "What you saw today was just a conversation. Nothing more."

"You don't owe me an explanation, Rachel," he tells her.

"Is that so? Because you didn't show up and you didn't call," she says. He winces slightly.

"It's just hard for me to see him. With you. Talking, and...he made you laugh," he says. He doesn't know why she's smiling at him. It's like she thinks all this is funny or something. "I guess I'm just still kinda sensitive after the whole...thing."

Rachel nods (she's always so understanding, he thinks). "Actually, that's what he wanted to talk about. It seems Noah is...perhaps missing your friendship," she explains delicately. Finn scoffs. "I know it's a lot to ask, maybe too much, that you forgive him, but could you at least make an effort?" She can tell he's ready to tell her, again, how much he hates Puck. "For glee." He looks at her like she's crazy to think that'd work. "For me?" she asks in a small voice.

Damn, this girl knows how to get her way.

"Every time I look at him, I remember what a liar he is," he says. He looks at her with a pained expression on his face. "Do you have any idea what that's like?"

"No," she admits. "But what about Quinn? I've seen you talking to her."

"It's different. I loved her," he says. Rachel thinks her heart breaks a little bit every time she hears that. She nods anyway, and looks to her hands. She wonders if he knows how uncomfortable it makes her to talk about Quinn. Or rather, to hear him talking about Quinn.

She notices he's wearing a pair of grey sweatpants and a plain black tee shirt. He's so casual. She thinks he might sleep in something similar, and she blushes, wondering why she's even thinking about what he sleeps in. It's completely inappropriate, especially right now, when she's sitting with him on his bed for the first time ever.

"I saw the photos downstairs," she says, trying to get back on track, and also to help prove her point. "You and Noah have known one another since you were children."

"He knocked up my girlfriend."

"There are a lot of years of friendship and leaning on one another there," she insists. "And I think it'd be foolish to throw it all away."

He turns towards her a little bit more, his knee brushing against her thigh. She sucks in a breath and looks up at him. "You know what it's like to have your best friend to betray you like that?"

She looks away from him, down at her hands, toying with the hem of her skirt. "No," she admits quietly. "I've never had a best friend."

He thinks he could cry or something, because that's just about the most heartbreaking thing he's ever heard.

"Rach," he says. She shrugs her shoulder, and when she looks up at him again, she's wearing that gorgeous smile of hers.

"It's okay," she says. She must be a good actress, because he almost believes her.

He takes a deep breath and thinks about it for a second, about everything that's happened and how much he actually misses his buddy. And maybe Rachel's right. If he can talk to Quinn, he can talk to Puck. He can at least try to put this all behind them. He's still got to see them five days a week for the next couple years, so he figures maybe he should try to let it go.

Of course, Rachel's right. She's always right.

And he thinks she can read his mind or something, because she's smiling at him like she knows he's already agreeing to her request.

He throws his arm around her shoulder and she leans against him, giggling a little bit as he sighs. He knows how much she loves winning. When she pulls away, he rolls his eyes at the smug smile on her face.

"I'll do it," he says. "For glee." Something flashes, maybe disappointment, in her eyes. "For you."

She thinks her heart is going to beat out of her chest. He's the sweetest boy in the world, and he might not always say the right thing, but when he does, it makes up for all the rest of it. And then there's his little smile, the one he gives her when he knows he's just said something to make her swoon, or when she's said something to make him all nervous.

And she takes just a second to think about how happy Noah's going to be when he and Finn start talking again.

"Will you be horribly upset if I now mention the cowboy wallpaper?" she asks, barely containing her smirk.

He lets out a playful growl and narrows his eyes, and when she giggles, he tickles her, and she stops thinking about that other boy and focuses on Finn's hands on her skin.

----

A few days after her talk with Finn, Puck shows up at Rachel's door. At 9:00 on a Saturday night, actually. To say she's surprised to see him would be an understatement. To say her fathers are curious would be a _vast_ understatement. To say that she wishes she wasn't wearing a pair of yoga pants and a form-fitting tank top would be the understatement of the _year_.

He's standing at her door in jeans and a white tee shirt, a hoodie zipped up to his chest and his hands in his pockets. He looks a little freaked out that her dads answered the door.

"Noah?" she asks. Her dads recognize him, of course, they just weren't expecting to see him, oh, ever.

"Hey," he says quietly. He looks to her dads, who appear to be waiting for an explanation of his arrival on their doorstep. "Sorry to come so late, I just wondered if I could speak with Rachel."

She smiles. She doesn't think she's ever seen him act so polite. Her dads step aside and Puck steps into the house, closing the door quietly behind him.

"Daddy, we'll be upstairs, okay?" Rachel says.

Her dads both nod, and Puck wonders just how much they trust their daughter. They really don't seem to mind that she's got guys coming coming to see her late at night. Not that he's here for _that_. He's just trying to talk to her. The fact that she's wearing the tightest pants he's ever seen in his life, and her shirt isn't quite hitting the top of those pants? Not helping. He can see her stomach, so tight and firm, and he can see how perfect her hips and ass are. He remembers complimenting her when they were dating, and she said her body comes from years of dancing. That's a hard image to get out of a guy's head.

Once they're in her room, she sits down on her bed, tucking one leg beneath her.

"I interrupt a workout or something?" he asks, looking her over once again.

"I practice yoga five times a week," she says nonchalantly.

Oh, good. A visual.

The thing is, in the weeks since the truth came out, Puck has realized that running errands like a bitch for Quinn and the baby was definitely not the same as being a boyfriend. And doing all that stuff really isn't making her want to be with him. Which makes him wonder if _he_ really wants to be with _her_. Sure, she's hot, beautiful even, and she's a cool girl when she's not being a raging bitch, with all the hormones and everything (and the fact that she's been doing it for years). But he thinks he actually likes being her friend. She still has no idea what she wants to do with the baby, and yeah, she's asking his opinion on the matter now, and they talk about it, but the thought of being with her for the long haul is becoming a little scary. He wants to be there for his daughter, if Quinn decides to keep her. In fact, there's nothing that could keep him from his little girl.

He's starting to think that there's a lot that could keep him from Quinn. He's starting to think that there's not much that would keep him with her.

Fuck, his life is so complicated.

Rachel Berry's sexy, messy ponytail and the swell of her breasts beneath her tight top is only complicating things more. Because it's not like he ever disliked her. She was one of the first people to actually speak to him after the truth came out, when everyone was trying to hate him. Maybe he should have been pissed at her, but he actually felt better (and still does) knowing that the truth is out and he doesn't have to hide anything anymore. He hasn't thanked her for any of that, because, well, let's not get carried away.

"So what brings you by?" she asks. He assumes she doesn't notice the way he's been looking at her, because he's sure she'd have some crazy-ass long lecture for him.

"Finn came by today," he says. She kind of smiles, half biting her lip like she's trying to hold back. "We talked and stuff. He said you told him to try."

"Was that not what I was supposed to do?" she asks pointedly.

He rolls his eyes and lets out a sigh. "Well, yeah. But I didn't know if it'd really work. I mean, he was pretty pissed."

"You knocked up his girlfriend," Rachel says seriously, repeating Finn's words from the other night. Puck grins and looks at her with a raised brow, like he's impressed or something. "What?"

"Knocked up? You surprise me, Berry," he says, almost laughing.

"Well, that's what happened. And even though I don't hold anything against you, I certainly don't agree with the way you..."

"Yeah, yeah. I get it. No one agrees with it. And they shouldn't. I was a dick," he says. "Safe to say I learned from that mistake."

Rachel almost smiles at him, because she likes that he can at least admit his wrongs.

And maybe also because there's something kind of nice about sitting in her bedroom with him on a Saturday night, having an actual conversation. Who's she kidding? It's nice to sit in her bedroom with anyone on a Saturday night. It sure beats sitting alone.

"Has Quinn decided what she's going to do?"

He moves so he's laying back against her like, 40 pillows, then puts one hand behind his head. "Not yet. It's not an easy decision, you know?"

"I know," she says. He raises his brow. "Well, I don't _know_, but...I can imagine."

He nods, then just looks at her for a few moments, and it's not just because she looks really hot in this outfit, or because she's not kicking him out or yelling at him or talking his ear off. It's because he has no idea why she _doesn't_ hate him. Maybe it's because his fuck up lead to Finn and Quinn's breakup (he's seen Rachel and Finn together enough to know that she's definitely reaping some of the rewards of that). He finds himself curious enough to ask.

"Why don't you hate me?"

"Pardon me?" she sputters, her brow furrowed like that's just about the most absurd things he's ever heard.

"Everyone else judged. You didn't seem to, not once since all this shit went down," he points out. "I dunno. I guess that of all people, I thought you'd be the one kicking my ass."

She looks down at her lap. "Oh, because I'm such an uptight goody two shoes?"

He doesn't know what the fuck's up with her always putting words in his mouth, but he thinks it should stop, like, now. "No, crazy girl," he says with a smirk. "Because you tend to want...I dunno...the best out of everyone. Sleeping with your best friend's girl isn't really the best."

There's a beat of silence, and she wonders why that's such a bad thing, wanting everyone at their best. And it's not that she's not disappointed in him. She is. But it's not so much the act that got him there in the first place. It's not even that he lied about it (from what she's heard, it was Quinn who wanted to keep it all a big secret anyway).

She figures they can be honest with one another. She thinks they always have been.

"I just don't understand why you thought you couldn't tell me," she says quietly, shaking her head. "When we were..."

He shrugs his shoulder. "You would have told Finn."

"No, I wouldn't have," she says. But she's looking to her lap and she's not even sure she believes herself.

"Berry, you talk _all the time_, and you're in love with the guy. You would have told him."

"But I was with you," she says defensively.

He scoffs and shakes his head. "Doesn't matter. You would've."

He watches her for a few seconds, and she looks like she's clenching her jaw. He doesn't think she's going to start crying or anything, but he can tell she's thinking of something really heavy.

And then she says something in the saddest voice he's ever heard, and he's pretty sure he hates himself a little.

"It's okay if no one trusts me."

"I didn't say..."

"No, it's true," she says, shrugging one shoulder. She looks at him and her eyes are all sad. "I talk too much and I'm selfish. And sometimes I don't think before making decisions, and when I do, it's possible that they're simply the _wrong_ decisions. I can't blame people for not trusting me."

He doesn't know why he says it, but he thinks it's the truth anyway.

"I trust you."

Just because he thinks she would have told Finn doesn't mean that he didn't necessarily want to tell her. He can't really blame her for telling the truth. In fact, he actually admires her. He thinks it's kind of cool, the way she just is who she is without really worrying about how it makes her look to other people.

After all, he wouldn't be sitting with her right now, talking about this whole issue, if he didn't trust her. He hopes she knows that. He's not gonna tell her again.

----

Rachel's standing at her locker one day, and when she looks up, she sees Finn, Puck, Matt, Mike and Artie all coming down the hall together, all laughing and smiling, and she can't help but think about how good things have been lately. Finn and Puck are talking again, getting along almost (only almost) as though nothing ever happened. Since their win at Sectionals, the group has been brought closer together, and it's nice to see the football guys pulling Artie into their group.

As they approach her, Finn bumps fists with the guys and tells them he'll see them later. He's smiling at her as he steps in front of her, and when she glances to the other guys, Puck winks at her. She really doesn't know what that means.

But then Finn's kind of leaning against the locker next to hers, and she can smell his cologne, and she thinks she's swooning a little. It happens. All the time, actually.

"You wanna come over tonight? Mom's working," he says with a smile. She really wishes she could control this blushing problem. Finn catches on quickly. "No. Hey, whoa. I didn't mean it like..."

"I know," she whispers. For all the talking they've done, they've never talked about...that. Or this. Or them, or whatever it is that's between them. "What time?"

He smiles and gives her the details, and he runs his hand down her elbow before he tells her that he has to get to basketball practice, and she nods and tells him she'll see him later.

The butterflies flutter in her stomach for the rest of the day, and they don't go away, not even when she sings the song that always calms her nerves. Not even when she's on her way to his house or when she knocks at his door. She thinks she could scream, and she doesn't know why this feels so different from any other night, but it does. They hang out all the time, but never alone, unsupervised. She should be 'cool' enough that this isn't a big deal, but it really feels like one. She knows, of course, that he doesn't like being at home alone when his mom's working, but that's why he goes to her place. He's never invited her over. Ever.

The door swings open and Puck walks out, and he's laughing. "Hey, Berry," he says. She's more than a little stunned to see him there. "Have fun."

He winks at her again, but it's all suggestive this time, and she thinks she might see jealousy in his eyes, but it's probably all in her head. (Because why would he be jealous?)

"Sorry about that," Finn says. "He invited himself over after practice, and..."

"It's okay," she says, smiling at him. He opens the door a little wider and she steps inside. "I'm actually glad to see you two getting along again. It makes everything less tense."

They step into the living room, where ESPN is on and there are a couple cans of soda sitting on the coffee table. She wonders if this is what the boys always do when they're together, now that they aren't actively tormenting people. He tidies up the living room a little bit, then switches off the television. He pours her a glass of water when she asks (she's _so nervous_) and then he smiles at her all sweetly and leads her towards the stairs and up to his room.

They talk for a little while about their school days and glee, the new song Mercedes and Tina have been paired up to sing, and how good Rachel's taking that. She just shrugs her shoulder and tells him that maybe she's becoming more of a team player, and he smiles and tells her that he's proud of her. Her cheeks hurt from smiling.

It's kind of dark in his room, just the dim bedside lamp switched on as they talk, and somehow they gravitate towards one another. He's laying back on his bed, and she's sitting next to him, facing him, and sometimes his arm will brush her hip or her wrist and she'll look away, hoping that he won't see how he makes her blush, or how he makes her smile, or how bad she wants to kiss him.

The conversation takes a turn, and he asks her favourite colour, her favourite animal and her best memory from when she was a kid. She asks him the same, and they speak in quieter tones, and somehow, his arm ends up draped over her thighs lazily, and when she accidentally moves her hand and bumps his, he takes her little fingers in his and weaves them together with his own. She takes an audible breath and he smiles at her before he sits up, leans forward, and kisses her.

It's tentative, like their other kisses, but then his hand comes up to rest on her cheek, and she grasps the front of his shirt in her hand, and when he lays down again, he pulls her with him, and then she's laying half on top of him. She giggles a little when they part, then he smiles and kisses her gently and says her name, and she wonders if he notices that her hands are shaking.

They kiss for a while, just getting used to one another, and when his tongue presses against hers, she lets out a noise from the back of her throat that she can't quell, and it makes him hold her a little closer. Her leg is over his, and her hand is on his chest, and she'd really, really love to take charge and climb on top of him, but she thinks he's as nervous as she is, and she doesn't want to freak him out and send him running again.

Her phone rings around 9:00, and she remembers that she told her dads she'd be home by then. She tries to catch her breath before she answers, but she's still seeing stars, and Finn's hand is still rubbing her back. She feels lightheaded when she tells her dad they just got caught up watching a movie and she'll be home soon, and she doesn't even feel guilty that she's just lied to her dad for the first time.

Finn walks her to the door, and they're both quiet, and she doesn't know what any of this means, but he wraps her up into a hug and then kisses her gently, lets it linger for a second, and smiles when she lets out a little humming sound when he pulls away.

"See you tomorrow, Rach," he says. She nods and bites her lip, and he laughs at her inability to speak.

He waits until she's backed out of the driveway before closing the door, and she can hardly concentrate on the road. She wants more of him. More of his hands and his lips and his pressure against her. She feels like they have lost time to make up for, and she wants nothing more than to just kiss him_ all the time_.

She thinks that just maybe this means something really big is about to happen.


	2. Chapter 2

Finn pretty much ignores her the next day at school.

She spends all day pretending that her heart isn't breaking. She doesn't know why he insists on hurting her. It's clear he's embarrassed (why, she doesn't know) and nervous around her, but she thinks he should just talk to her. Maybe if he did, they could actually get past this whole kiss-then-run routine they've practically perfected.

She doesn't know what she did wrong. She doesn't think she did anything wrong. Things were good the night before. Great, even! So why is he avoiding her? Why won't he even look at her?

Glee rehearsal is a nightmare. It's hard to sing lead with someone who won't even look you in the eyes. He holds her hand just loosely, like he doesn't want to be holding it at all, and while he's hitting all the right notes and singing all the right lyrics, there's nothing more to his performance than that.

Very uncharacteristically, Rachel suggests a break, and when Mr. Schue complies, she walks from the room by herself.

Puck doesn't know what the fuck's going on, but he can take a pretty good guess. Rachel's dramatics, for once, might not be completely out of the blue. Finn looks guilty as he sits down listlessly on one of the empty chairs in the room, and Puck nonchalantly walks out.

He finds Rachel down a quiet hallway with her back to the wall and her face in her hands. Shit. If she's crying, he's going to have to put on his nice guy face, the one he has to use with Quinn sometimes now. He doesn't really want to have to do that.

So he just stands across from her, his hands in his pockets, and she looks at him like he's crazy, as if she's asking what he's doing there. "What?" he asks.

"Why'd you follow me?" she asks.

(No tears. Sweet.)

"Didn't."

"You're a terrible liar," she says. There's a ghost of a smile on her lips (she's glad she has people who care enough now to follow her).

"You seem weird today. Wanted to make sure there wasn't something seriously wrong. And by serious, I mean, like, a death in the family or a...lion attack or something." He smiles to himself when she laughs. "Not you and Finn getting it on and him acting like a jerk."

Her face pales and she glares at him. "We did not...do that," she says quietly. He shrugs his shoulder. "I'm just...I'm getting really fed up not knowing where I stand with him. One moment we're just friends, then the next, he's kissing me on his bed, and then the next, he's treating me like I bit him or something."

Puck smirks and raises an eyebrow. "Some dudes like that, Berry." She blushes and lets out a huff. "So you two made out, huh?"

(He doesn't know what this feeling in his gut is, but he doesn't fucking like it. I mean, it's not like _he_ wants to make out with her or anything.)

(Except that he totally does.)

"We kissed, yes."

He's a little surprised that she's telling him this. He doesn't know why she is, but he doesn't want to ask her because he's not sure how to form the question without sounding like a dick. "And now he's like, the clumsy, stuttering idiot that he's probably hoping you find...fuckin'...charming or whatever," he states.

Rachel scoffs and sends him a withering look. "I don't think he's hoping I find him anything, actually. He's making it fairly clear that whatever happened between us was a mistake."

"Nah," Puck says, shaking his head. "Doubt it."

"Really?" she asks hopefully. Her eyes are all big and brown. She looks like a cartoon. A really hot cartoon that he wants all to himself.

(Whoa.)

"You forget I've made out with you. You're not bad, Berry. Actually? You're pretty fucking good," he says. She blushes again and looks to the floor. She sighs and checks the clock in the hall, realizing that their break is up. She doesn't want to go back in there. "I have an idea."

"Why does that fill me with an absurd amount of terror?" she asks. She's smiling. He thinks that was meant to be a joke, so he smiles back.

"Let's get outta here," he suggests.

(She wonders how he's reading her mind.)

"We can't. Rehearsal isn't even half over."

"Believe it or not, life goes on, even when you skip practice," he says, laughing at the look of dread on her face. "C'mon. You aren't feeling well. You're looking a little flushed. I'll drive you home."

She laughs a little and he tells her he'll meet her by her locker. He walks back to the choir room and tells Mr. Schue that Rachel's feeling pretty sick, that he's going to give her a lift home, and he sees the look of pure confusion (and maybe jealousy) on Finn's face. But whatever, Puck thinks, because if Finn's going to be an idiot, then Rachel shouldn't worry about him.

He laughs at the way Rachel has to hop up to get into his truck, and she talks his ear off about how a real man would offer his hand to help. He scoffs and tells her that being a real man has nothing to do with helping chicks into trucks, and she wonders what he means by that, but only until he catches her eye and she notices the lascivious look in his.

"Thank you for the ride, Noah," she says as they pull into her driveway. He doesn't say anything, and she looks over at him, and he's just kind of staring at her. "Would...would you like to come in?" she asks. "Daddy's on a business trip and dad won't be home until well after dinner." The gleam returns to his eye, and she scowls at him. "Don't even think about it."

He laughs and puts the truck in park, then cuts the engine and stuffs his keys into his pocket.

He hates that Finn's got this chick all crazy over him, because honestly? Puck wouldn't hate round two. He and Quinn have talked about how they just really wouldn't work as a couple, and he's kind of free to do what he wants, as long as he's around to answer her 9-1-1 texts about fucking ice cream and movies or whatever other shit she needs him to do. He doesn't know what's going on with Rachel and Finn, but he finds himself wishing it was nothing.

Once they're inside, she steps out of her shoes, and she hangs her jacket up in the closet. His mom didn't raise him in a barn, so he lines his shoes up neatly next to hers and slips his jacket onto a hanger in the closet. She smiles at him, because she knows he does this (whatever, when they were dating, she noticed).

"If you'd like to head upstairs, you can. I just have to call daddy and let him know I got home okay," she says. A wide smirk spreads on his lips. "And no, I will not be mentioning that there's a boy in the house, and I'll ask you to kindly not make mention of it to anyone either."

He holds his hands up in front of him and she smiles a little. He kinda likes this badass, devious side of her. Like, a lot. He glances over his shoulder to get another look at her as he walks toward the stairs. She's got her phone in her hand as she unbuttons her cardigan. He thinks his heart races.

When Rachel walks into her bedroom a few minutes later, he's sprawled out on top of her bed, and she actually smiles, because he looks pretty comfortable laying there like that.

"Dude, your bed is so kick ass," he says seriously. "I mean, not all this pink shit or like, you know, the lace pillows or whatever. It's so soft, though."

She smiles and hangs up her cardigan. He watches the sway of her skirt and then notices the outline of her bra beneath her white button down shirt. "I've got a goose down pillow top. I find it's better for my back, and it certainly helps after a dance class, when my muscles are exhausted and aching."

"Right." (He's picturing her with like, her leg extended over her head.)

"Would you excuse me? I'm just going to change quickly."

He nods because he can't talk, and there is no way Rachel is making him feel this way. _No way_. She steps into her walk-in closet and closes the door behind her, and he's very, very aware that the only thing between him and her mostly naked body is that door.

She stands there, completely comfortable, and she wonders how she can be so sure of herself in front of Noah, knowing who he is and how he acts around women, and yet she's so insanely nervous when it comes to even looking at Finn. Here she is, stepping out of her skirt and unbuttoning her shirt while Noah sits 15 feet away on her bed, and there are no butterflies, no nerves, and no second thoughts. She trusts him, of course, but she trusts Finn too.

She doesn't know if it's just because she has feelings for Finn. If she's being completely honest with herself, sometimes when Noah smiles at her, her stomach does a little flip thing. It's completely out of nowhere, and it's never expected, but she likes it, at least a little bit. It's not a nervous feeling or anxious at all. It's almost pleasant.

She's pulling her hair out of the back of her sweater when she steps into the bedroom again, and Puck grins at her (and her stomach jumps).

"Are you wearing jeans?" he asks in surprise, looking her up and down.

She glances at her outfit of dark jeans and a black v-neck sweater. "I wear jeans."

"I've never seen you wear jeans," he tells her. He lays back against the pillows again. "I mean, not outside of like, our glee costumes or whatever."

"Well, I do prefer skirts. But on weekends, I often wear jeans," she explains. She takes a seat in the chair in the corner of her room and opens her laptop.

"Well, then I wish I could see you more on weekends. You look good in jeans," he tells her. She looks up at him through her eyelashes, and he thinks she's like, the sexiest girl who doesn't even know she's sexy. He likes that about her.

As she scrolls through her email account, she's reminded that it's a Friday, and that he's usually out...doing whatever it is he does on Friday nights. "It's Friday."

"Thanks for the update."

"You're here. With me. On a Friday," she states. He grabs a pillow from one of the millions and tosses it repeatedly into the air. "Why?"

He sighs and sits up so he can look at her. "Because you looked all sad and shit. And because even though Finn's my boy again and I'm supposed to be all cool to him, it's fun to fuck with him sometimes. He's obviously got feelings for you, and he's obviously too much of a moron to figure it the fuck out already. I'm helping along that process."

"You're making him jealous," she says, finally catching on. Noah nods and she bites her cheek to keep from smiling. "Well, that's one way to go about getting him to notice me."

"Rachel, you spent last night with your tongue down his throat," he says with a laugh (the laugh covers how much he hates to say it). "He notices you." She's all shy again and he rolls his eyes. "You shouldn't be so hard on yourself."

"I'm not."

"Yeah, you are. You're cool enough, and you're like, really good looking," he tells her. The little smile she tries to hide makes him really proud to have paid her the compliment. But he's not here to seduce her. He's actually trying to help her get with his best friend. He wonders who the hell he's turning into. "I have an idea."

"Hmm?" she mumbles.

"Okay, what are you doing over there? Shouldn't you be entertaining your guest?" he asks teasingly. She doesn't pick up on the teasing.

"Oh! Noah, I'm so sorry. I'm just trying to put together an appropriate selection of music. You know, something you won't hate," she says. He actually smiles at her.

"'Preciate it, babe." She glares at him, and he rolls his eyes. What's wrong with being called 'babe'? He doesn't get why chicks get all crazy over that.

When she hits play on her iTunes, he's more than a little surprised that an R&B song comes through the speakers. It's not one he knows, but no, he doesn't hate it. "Is this okay?" she asks. He nods and lets out a little laugh. There's a part of her that really likes that she can surprise him. "So what's this idea?"

"Santana's having a party tonight..."

"No."

"C'mon! Finn'll be there. And Mercedes and Kurt are going," he says, hoping that'll convince her.

"Mercedes hates me, and Kurt wants to kill me," she reminds him.

"Why is that, by the way?" he asks.

She gets up and moves over to sit on the bed next to him. Her hip is resting against his, and he has to sit up a little before he does something she'll smack him for. "Can you keep a secret?" she asks. He gets this absurd look on his face that she doesn't trust for a second. "Noah, I'm serious. It's a secret."

"Okay. I promise," he says, rolling his eyes.

"Kurt's in love with Finn."

"What!?" Puck shouts. "What the fuck!? What is _with_ Finn fucking Hudson? Everyone's fucking..." Rachel raises her brow at him and he calms down a little. "I'm just saying. I'm a _stud_, and that guy needs to recite a fucking poem to remember how to tie his shoes, and he still gets more play than me."

She giggles and it takes everything he has not to scowl at her. "Would you rather Kurt was in love with _you_?" she teases.

(She's wondering just how many of the rumors about Noah's rather colourful sex life are false.)

"What? Fuck no!" She laughs again and he reaches for her hand to pull her towards him so he can...well, he's not entirely sure. She's laughing in his arms and he messes up her hair for good measure, just to make it seem like he didn't just want to touch her.

Which he did.

"Noah! Stop," she laughs, pushing herself away from him. (She remembers Finn's concern over Puck making her laugh, and she wonders if maybe this whole 'jealousy' absurdity could actually work.)

"So Kurt wants to scratch your eyes out because you have a pus..." She clamps her hand over his mouth before he can say the word. There's a sparkle in his eye as he glares at her, and she gasps when he nips at her palm with his teeth. "Because he's a dude and Finn isn't into dudes?"

"That appears to be the case."

She spaces out a little, and Puck watches her for a second. He's pretty sure that dazed look on her face can only mean one thing. "Ugh. Can you please not fantasize about my best friend when I'm sitting right here? Fuck."

"I wasn't _fantasizing_!" she says, whispering the last word.

"Alright look, you wanna come to this party or not?" he asks. He makes it sound like a big inconvenience, you know, to give the illusion that he doesn't actually care. (Win.)

"Will you...I mean, I don't want to just be left alone once we get there," she says quietly.

"Don't worry about that. I'll make sure we're glued at the hip. Finn'll be losing his shit by the end of the first hour."

She doesn't know why she agrees. She really doesn't. But before she knows it, she's asking for advice on how to wear her hair ("down", because he likes it that way, but he doesn't tell her that last part) and what to do with her makeup ("something sexy, because it's a fucking party, Berry") and if her outfit is okay ("bust out some heels so you're not a midget.")

She orders them pizza and she brings it up to her room with places in her hand and orders him not to get anything on her bed. So they eat on the floor, his back against the wall and hers against the bed frame, and he makes her laugh. It's pretty easy, he's learned. She's a fun girl. You know, when she's not all intense and scary and/or annoying.

She does one final little spin before they leave the house, and he smiles when he tells her she looks great. She's already called her dad and told him she's going out, and he was so happy that she's going to a party, he didn't even bother to set a curfew. "Badass," Puck says, wiggling his brows. She shoves him as she blushes, and he laughs as they get into his truck.

As they pull into Santana's neighbourhood, Rachel panics and grabs his arm. "I'm supposed to be sick!"

He glances over at her and says, "Puck's the magical remedy, baby. A few hours with him and you're good as new. Better, in some cases."

"Please refrain from referring to yourself in the third person," she mumbles.

When they pull up to the house, there are several cars in the driveway and on the side of the street, and Puck tells Rachel to "take a fucking breath before you pass out."

She can feel everyone's eyes on her as she walks through the living room with Puck behind her, but she decides it's just like a role she needs to commit to, and she keeps her shoulders back and her head up, and she doesn't flinch when Puck rests his hand on her back to steer her through to the kitchen.

"Rachel!" Brittany squeals, flouncing over for a hug. Rachel glances at the other familiar faces in the room, and they're all just laughing.

"She's been drinking fast," Mike explains. Puck shakes his head and Rachel smiles as Brittany talks about how good this party is. (Rachel isn't convinced yet.) "Want one?"

Rachel glances around the room at the faces of these people who she doesn't yet really consider her friends, and she isn't sure what they're expecting her to say. When she turns and sees Noah smiling at her, he rolls his eyes and reaches for a cup.

"Yeah, she wants one," he says.

Finn walks into the kitchen with Matt, and Matt's face lights up with he sees the newest arrivals. "Rachel! I didn't know you were coming, baby, how are ya?" he asks happily. She'd cringe if he wasn't always like this. The way he calls girls 'baby' isn't lecherous, it's endearing.

"I'm good, thanks," she says with a smile.

"Feeling better?" Finn asks worriedly.

"Much, thank you," she says. She's very well aware that those are the first real words he's spoken to her all day.

Puck leans in, knowing this is the perfect time to get this shit started, and whispers in Rachel's ear. "You don't have to drink that if you don't want to, 'kay?"

She thinks he almost sounds sweet, concerned, even. She smiles at him and nods, and he winks at her. (Puck notices that Finn looks confused and maybe a little pissed.) They all gather around the island in the kitchen, where there are cans of beer and other bottles of alcohol, all set out with a few bowls of chips and stuff. Rachel takes a sip of her beer (she's never had it before) and Puck nudges her with his elbow as he smiles at her. She thinks he's proud of her or something, for acting like a normal teenager. They all talk for a while, Finn standing next to Quinn across from Rachel and Puck, and Rachel wonders if it'll always be like that, always Finn and Quinn, even when they're not really together. She catches him looking at her a couple times, and she smiles weakly before she looks away.

How does he not want the same things she does? Her feelings can't be one-sided. She can't want him _this much more_ than he wants her. Not after the way he kissed her and whispered her name the night before.

She's halfway finished her beer, and she's trying not to count the amount of extra minutes she'll have to put in on the elliptical to work off the beer and chips. Puck has left her side, but is still in the room, sipping from a bottle of water (and she loves that he's responsible enough not to drink and drive) as he talks with Mike and Brittany.

Rachel's kind of halfway paying attention to the conversation going on around her, but her ears perk up when she hears someone suggest a game of some sort. They all rule out I Never (and Rachel breathes a sigh of relief, because though she's never played it, she'd really rather not go there, divulging all sorts of secrets and stuff). Quinn suggests Truth or Dare, and everyone laughs and agrees.

Mike's forced to tell everyone that he lost his virginity to one of his older sister's friends at a party at his parents place that his sister was grounded for a _year_ for. Kurt is dared to kiss a girl, so he leans over (grimacing the whole time) and plants one on Quinn, who laughs and says she's honoured, then presses her lips to his cheek as he wipes his mouth with his paisley pocket square.

And Rachel realizes she's actually having _fun_. She's laughing along with everyone else, watching with wide eyes as Brittany is dared to walk around upside down on her hands for a full minute. And she does it, so everyone claps and cheers her on and kind of holds their breath until her face turns back to its natural colour.

"C'mon, Rachel. Truth or dare," Santana says. There's that glint in her eyes that says she's just waiting to be able to humiliate Rachel. They may all be on the same team, but Santana is still kind of a bitch.

Rachel looks around a little and sees Finn smiling gently at her. Then she catches Pucks eye, and it's like he's happy that she's surviving this party. "Truth, I guess," she says.

Quinn looks at her with a squint and asks, "who was your first kiss?"

The rest of the girls giggle, falling against one another, and Finn looks to the floor. Puck looks at her like he's anticipating her answer, almost like he's trying to tell her she can do it, give details of her personal life. The rest of the group is waiting for her answer, because as far as they know, she's never really kissed anyone. Even she and Noah's relationship was kind of a quiet one, and they certainly never kissed in public.

She knows she can't tell the truth, that it'll set off fireworks. And the lie she has to tell might do it anyway, actually. Quinn looks like she might be out for blood, laying some kind of arbitrary claim to both Finn and Puck, but Rachel needs an answer, and this one will have to do.

"Puck," she says quietly, her eyes locking with his. He actually smiles at her. She wonders if he believes it.

Judging by the way the rest of the room is whispering, everyone else does. Except Finn, who's looking at her with a hurt expression.

There was a time when she was just a loser that no boy in school wanted to even cast a second glance to. Now the two most popular ones seem to want her, and she doesn't know what she's going to do about it.

Because on some level, she likes both of them. Maybe it's in very different ways, but she has feelings for them both. She doesn't know what she feels for Noah, but after today, it's certainly something. He's been exceptionally sweet to her, and they've had fun, even when it was just the two of them. Maybe especially then. She likes the way she can surprise him, with the jeans and the music, and the way he looked at her when she was all put together before they left her house.

She suddenly finds herself needing to get away from the crowd, so she excuses herself and tries to find an unoccupied washroom. She carefully dabs some cool water on her face and tries to compose herself, and when she steps outside, Finn is standing with his back against the wall, hands in his pockets as he looks at her.

"Hey."

"Hi," she says nervously.

"You came with Puck," he states.

"After I started feeling better, he asked. He said everyone would be here," she say. It surprises her how easily she's lying to him. They're little white lies, but still. "I didn't come _with_ him. As a date or anything."

He smiles at her a little bit then. "Good."

"Is it?" she asks. When someone starts walking down the hall towards them, Finn reaches out and grabs her arm, pulling her towards him so they're facing one another. His shoulder is leaning against the wall, and she's standing there, noticing that there's only a foot of space between their bodies.

"Hey, I'm sorry about today," he says. "I just...I don't know how to act around you. You're...you make me really nervous."

She laughs softly and nods her head. "I know how you feel."

"You wanna go somewhere? We can get out of here and talk," he suggests. Her face lights up and she nods.

"Let me just go say goodbye to Noah," she says.

They both head back into the kitchen to say their goodbyes, and no one thinks it's strange that Finn is giving Rachel a ride home, because they've practically been joined at the hip for the last month anyway. Finn talks to Quinn and the other girls, then Matt and Mike, and Rachel pulls Puck aside.

"I hope you don't mind..."

"Nah. Course not," he says seriously, crossing his arms over his chest. "So you and Finn kissed, huh? I mean...before me."

She looks around to make sure no one's listening. "How did you know that?"

"I saw the looks going between you two when Quinn asked," he says with a shrug. "No biggie."

The way he says it lets her know that the secret is safe with him. "Thanks."

He notices Finn looking, so just to be a bit of a jerk (and whatever, to help Rachel out, he supposes) he pulls her into a hug. "I wouldn't have minded being your first though," he says, whispering in her ear.

She _knows_ how red her face is when she pulls herself away from him. (And she's still not as nervous with Noah as she is when she gets into Finn's car so he can drive her home.)


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:** Quick update, because I want to get this chapter out of the way! I know there's more Finn/Rachel than most people probably want. Sorry, but it's necessary, and it won't be that way for long.

**----**

Puck is waiting for her at her locker on Monday morning when she gets to school. He's leaning back against it, his letterman jacket on and his eyes closed, and when she steps up to him, he doesn't notice. She reaches out and places her hand on his arm, and he jumps a little. He shuffles aside as she says good morning.

"Sorry, babe. Power nap."

"How can you sleep standing up?" she asks with a laugh. She loads her books into her locker and organizes them in order of her classes for the day. She sees him shrug his shoulders.

"So d'you and Finn work it out?" he asks. The way he says it is totally sleazy and makes her glare at him. It also lets her know that he already knows the answer to what he's asking.

"We talked."

"About?"

"About...things," she says. She gathers her books for her first class, closes her locker and looks at him. "It's private."

He rolls his eyes as they start walking. "Please. Finn's my boy. _We_ talked."

"What did he say to you?" She looks up at him, all worried that he knows everything there is to know about she and Finn.

"Just that you thought he was ignoring you but he really just didn't know how to act 'cause he wants you so bad," Puck says candidly. He figures there are no secrets now, not between the three of them.

(Except that whole thing where Puck thinks _he_ wants her so badly. Just that.)

Rachel blushes and holds her books close to her chest. "He said that to you?"

(He said the same thing to her.)

"Yup. Looks like it's working out for you after all, Berry. Congratulations."

She doesn't get a chance to ask him why he sounds upset, because he continues walking and she's stopped in front of her classroom door. He doesn't turn around to look at her or anything. That shouldn't surprise her, but it really does.

----

She's laying half beneath Finn on her bed, their homework abandoned in favour of much more fun activities. Every time his hand brushes over her side, she laughs a little against his mouth, and he apologizes, because he keeps forgetting she's ticklish. Only his upper half is pressing against her, his lower half to her left, and they've been kissing for a few minutes. She playfully tugs at his bottom lip with her teeth, and he lets out a growl. She pushes him away and bolts upright.

The only reason she did that is because she remembers Noah liking it. But why is she thinking of Noah right now, when Finn's laying on her bed, his hand on her hip and his body pressing against hers?

"You okay?" he asks.

(She hears that other boy. _"You okay, baby?"_)

"Fine," she says, laying back down. His eyes rake over her face and he plays with her hair. "I'm fine."

He smiles before he kisses her again, and she shifts her hips, because she's a little desperate to feel more of him. She feels his tongue tracing her bottom lip, and his hand slips beneath her shirt and up her body. She gasps a little when it lands upon her breast. He pulls away a little, or tries, and she holds him in place.

"Too fast?" he asks breathlessly.

She shakes her head and smiles up at him, resting her hand at the back of his neck to pull him closer. "Not too fast."

They carry on for another couple minutes, and all Rachel can think is that if he doesn't stop things, she isn't sure she'll be able to. Of course, her dad is home and her bedroom door is actually open, but she thinks that she could give herself to Finn right now, that's how bad she wants him and how much she likes him.

He pulls away abruptly when he rests her hand beneath his shirt at the small of his back. Her face feels hot, and his is flushed, and his lips are red from kissing.

"Finn?" She's tempted to ask if she did anything wrong, but she's said the words to him before, and she's pretty sure she didn't this time anyway.

"I'm fine. It's fine. I just...we should slow down. Studying! We should study."

He grabs his books and pulls them onto his lap, and she thinks her face probably goes even redder when she realizes what's going on. It hits her like a ton of bricks actually, the realization of what happened in the auditorium. She knows the _exact_ thing hasn't happened, but he's putting a stop to things before it does. Oh god, she feels hot all over knowing she can have that affect on him. On anyone.

(Noah had said things to her and moved beneath her in such a way that she knew she was capable of making him feel...certain things. It's still strange to her.)

"I'm just going to run to the washroom," she says. She kisses his cheek and gets up, and she thinks she hears him groan as she walks away. It's not like she meant for her skirt to fly up. (She just didn't stop it either.)

Once she's behind the locked door, she tries to get herself under control. She straightens out her top (and_ oh god, his hand was beneath the fabric_). She splashes water on her face and pulls her hair into a ponytail to get it off the back of her neck. Taking a deep breath, she decides that she can't leave Finn alone in her bedroom any longer.

"Hey," she says nervously, tucking her hands up into the sleeves of her sweater.

"Hey, sorry about..."

"No," she interrupts. "Nothing to apologize for. I actually...stopping was good."

He smiles at her and she goes red again as she sits down next to him. He laughs softly and drapes his arm around her, kissing her temple. "But...the other stuff was good too."

"Yeah," she agrees. She bites her lip, and she can't help herself. She leans over and kisses him quickly, just once. He smiles at her in return.

They go back to studying. She's laying on her stomach with her legs in the air and her books in front of her, and she explains that whole negative integers thing to him again, because that's pretty tough if you ask him, and then he's aching to kiss her again, but he knows they'd get caught up again, and as fun as that was, he doesn't want it happening again right now.

"Finn?"

"Hmm?" He's more than just a little distracted by her legs as he looks at her. But he doesn't like to stare. (He doesn't like her to know when he's staring.)

"What is this? I mean, I know I like you, and you've told me you like me, but we aren't really dating, are we? And we can kiss like...like that, and that's really nice, but I don't want to give off the impression that I just kiss any boy, you know? You know I don't do that, right?"

"Yeah, Rach. I know you don't."

"So what...I mean, are you my boyfriend?" she asks, toying with the corner of her page in front of her.

"You know, it's weird. When I was with Quinn, all I could think about was how I wanted you to be my girlfriend. I mean, that's not _all_ I was thinking about, but...I thought it. You know?" he asks. She nods her head gently, and he wonders how hard it is for her to hold back her smile. "But now, it's like, I could...I mean, if we wanted to be together, we could."

"But...but you don't want to?" she asks. She sits up and tucks her legs beneath her. She thinks she might cry if he says he doesn't want to be with her.

"No! No, I do. I just...I don't want to deal with that huge, intense, public relationship thing," he says, his voice trailing towards the end.

Her shoulders go back and he knows it's coming. "I won't be your dirty little secret."

"That's not...! No, that's not what I'm trying to say. Man, I'm bad at this. It's just that I'm not really into PDA," he explains.

Her brow furrows. "But you and Quinn..."

"That was what Quinn wanted."

There's a part of her, a pouty, childish part, that's begging her to ask, _'what about what _I_ want?'_ but she refrains.

"I wanna be with you and stuff, Rachel, but I don't want to deal with people talking, and I kinda feel bad like, rubbing it in Quinn's nose," he says. She supposes she can understand, but she wonders why he's so concerned about Quinn. He takes her hand, though, and runs his thumb along hers. "I like doing this kinda stuff when it's just the two of us. It's sweeter this way."

The way he says it makes her actually believe it. They can keep this part of their relationship private, and it's just the two of them, no one else has to see any of it. She likes that she's just his, that he wants to protect her from the backlash. And okay, maybe she even likes that he's a considerate enough boy not to want to flaunt his new relationship in front of his old girlfriend.

"Is that okay?" he asks tentatively.

Rachel nods and leans in closer. "That's okay."

She kisses him gently, and he pulls her close to him, but they both stop before things get too heated, and they laugh a little bit. She promises she'll try to behave and he coughs in surprise at her words.

She smiles up at him from her book as she works, and she thinks she's got everything she's wanted for so long.

(It should probably feel a little better than it does.)

----

"Rachel Berry."

She turns around and she's already smiling when she sees Noah walking towards her. "Noah Puckerman. What can I do for you?" He crosses his arms and leans against the locker next to hers. The way he's looking at her lets her know that if she gives him room to, he's going to make a disgusting comment. "Please refrain from taking advantage of the opportunity for a sexual remark that I so obviously set myself up for."

He laughs a little and looks to the floor. She thinks he looks almost sweet when he's not trying to make her uncomfortable. (Or when he's not flaunting his obvious sex appeal.)

"Just talked to Finn. He said he's taking you out tonight?"

Puck's heard all about the relationship between Finn and Rachel, how they're dating, but they don't even look like it in public. All Puck can think is that when he had her, he held her on his arm like she was a fucking trophy. And that he'd do it again if he was given the chance.

"Yes, actually," she says, flipping her hair over her shoulder. "We're going to dinner, then to see Dear John."

"Oh, fuck," Puck groans. "Better him than me."

She looks over at him, and she's honestly wonder why he'd say something like that. It's almost like he wants to take her out, but not to do something 'lame'. She wonders if she's making it all up. She thinks that he likes her or something, but that's crazy, isn't it? He made it clear that they weren't even friends, but now he's stopping by her locker and giving her advice about guys and smiling at her like this. And why would he help her get things together with Finn if he wanted her for himself? She decides she's being crazy. He doesn't want her.

Maybe he just wants her to be happy.

Maybe they are friends after all.

"Well, I'm sure it'll be lovely," she says as she closes her locker.

She starts to walk away, but he can't let her go like that. He doesn't know what the hell his problem is, but he can't stop helping her. Like she's his friend or something. He doesn't want her with Finn (doesn't really want her with anyone) but he keeps on giving her advice, and he doesn't fucking know why.

"Hey," he says, catching up to her. "Don't do that lame chick thing where you rest your arm on the armrest between you and then wait for him to take your hand. You want to hold his hand, just fucking take it, okay?"

"Okay," she says, looking at him, completely confused.

"Trust me. Guys hate that shit. And we love it when girls take charge. Which I _know_ you don't have a problem with," he says, smirking at her to let her know that yes, he's referring to their makeout sessions, when she'd climb onto his lap out of nowhere and start kissing him. (And did he have any complaints about that? Absolutely fucking not.)

"Noah!" she laughs.

"Hey, babe, I'm just saying." He holds up his hands and she swats at his stomach with her books. "Seeya later."

"Goodbye, Noah," she says, laughing again as he winks and turns to walk down the hall.

----

Puck stands in the hall with Matt, Mike and a few of the other guys on his basketball team, and he watches Finn and Rachel leaving school for their 'date'. It's Friday night, and there's a party he knows he can go to and drink his share of beer and probably fool around with or sleep with a random girl. But he doesn't want to do that. Not at all.

He thinks about Finn taking Rachel out, and he thinks that he might like Rachel enough to even go to that douchey movie if she wanted to.

The girl is all up in his head, and he needs to get rid of her somehow. Normally, a night of drinking and banging some chick would do the trick. But he's pretty sure there's no way in hell that's gonna work.

He sees Quinn struggling with her bag, and he walks over and takes it for her, asks her if she wants him to buy her dinner or something. She goes on and on about her chicken wing craving as they make their way to his truck, and he thinks that maybe a night of hanging out with Quinn will rid him of thoughts of Rachel. And Finn. And what Rachel and Finn are doing on their 'date'. (Fuck.)

Halfway through their dessert (well, he's done, but Quinn ordered another piece of cake after her first) she looks at him like she's trying to figure out what's going on in his head.

"Why are you all moody?" she asks, her mouth full of chocolate.

"M'not."

"Liar."

"It's nothing."

"You're hanging out with me, a pregnant, hormonal, virtual social outcast on a Friday night. I know Byron's having a party, and yet you're here with me," she says, raising her brow and pointing at him with her fork.

"Jesus, can't a guy buy dinner for the mother of his bastard spawn?" he asks. She kicks him under the table, and he laughs.

"Don't call our daughter bastard spawn," Quinn says quietly, running her hand over her stomach a few times. He finds himself smiling as she glances at her bump.

"Like you haven't said it."

"She was playing soccer with my bladder," Quinn says in her defense. They both laugh a little bit, and he leans across the table. He swipes his finger through the chocolate sauce on her plate and licks it off. "Okay, so you're disgusting. _And_ there's something going on with you."

"It's nothing, Q. Seriously. I just didn't feel like going to a party," he says. He shrugs his shoulder for good measure, and she seems to buy it.

They head to the mall and Quinn buys a couple dresses, and she convinces Puck to buy a shirt that doesn't have some slogan or saying on it. She refuses to let him buy her a tee shirt with a carton of milk and the word MILF printed on it (come on! how awesome would that be?) They actually have a good time, joking around and walking through the mall, and neither of them cares about the way people look at them. By now, he's used to being the hooligan with the mohawk, and she's used to being the pregnant teenager with the cross around her neck. He has fun, and he almost forgets about why he needed the distraction in the first place.

But as he passes Rachel's place on the way to Quinn's, and he sees Finn's car in the driveway, he finds himself gripping the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles go white.

He doesn't do jealousy. He didn't really do it when Finn had Quinn, and he certainly didn't care when Santana started banging that dude on the hockey team.

Apparently, he does jealousy now. Over Rachel fucking Berry.

This is a _problem_.

----

Rachel's finding it harder and harder to be around Finn at school and not slip her hand into his or kiss him in the hallway or after they sing together. People know they're together, like the glee kids and a couple of the nicer basketball players, but other than that, they're pretty much invisible. It's not like she wants to flaunt their relationship or anything, and she certainly doesn't need everyone to know she's with him. It's not about everyone else. It's about her. She likes being with him and she likes the way her tiny hand fits into his. She likes the way she has to get up on her toes to kiss him, or the way he has to lean down to hug her.

She just wants to feel that as much as possible. All of it. They spend a lot of time at either of their houses, and they go on little dates, and it's all really nice, but she can't help but want more. She isn't going to push him.

"Hey," he says one day as she's walking toward the choir room. She hasn't seen him since he walked her to second period, since he had a meeting with his coach at lunch.

"Hi."

"Good day?" he asks. He pushes the door open for her. They're the first ones there, and she smiles up at him when he rests his hand on her back as she's walking through the door.

"Very good, thank you. How was yours?" she asks.

Her breath catches in her throat when he reaches for her hips and pulls her toward him, leaning down to kiss her. She lets out a squeak from the back of her throat, then her hands come up to rest on his arms, and she lets him pull her a little bit closer. He pulls away and raises his hand to wipe a smudge of lip gloss from just below her bottom lip. She's looking dazedly up at him, eyes all sparkly.

"Better now," he says.

She smiles and leans up to kiss him again. She doesn't know how long they're standing there, but someone walks in behind them. They don't even realize they aren't alone until they hear chairs shuffling. Rachel pulls away abruptly, lifting her hand to her mouth as she spins around. Her back is to Finn's chest, and Puck slouches in his chair. She thinks he looks angry.

"Noah. Are you okay?" she asks. She feels Finn's hand slide over the small of her back as he moves away from her to sit in an empty seat.

"Fine," Puck mumbles.

She doesn't believe him, but then Quinn, Matt and Brittany walk into the room, and she doesn't bother asking anything more.

She knows he wouldn't tell her anyway.

----

After spending most of the next couple weeks holed up in his house, listening to angry music and trying to avoid his mom and sister. He realized what an idiot he was for pushing Finn and Rachel together. Why did he _do_ that? Why had he been so willing to just give her up so she could be happy?

Oh, because he's an idiot. Right.

He supposes it all comes down to wanting to make amends with everyone or something. He wanted to make Finn happy by giving him Rachel, and make Rachel happy by helping her with Finn. He's not entirely sure when he became the kind of guy who cares about other people, but it was probably around the time he got laid out on the floor of the choir room with Finn wailing on his face.

And now? Now he's just a pathetic fucking loser sitting at home alone on a Sunday afternoon, thinking about a girl he didn't even know he wanted until it was really too late.

"Noah!"

"I'm not hungry, mom!" he shouts through his closed door for the third time. Damn, that woman is like a fucking drug pusher with her sandwiches.

"Noah! There's someone here to see you!"

He groans and throws his head back. "Send 'em up!"

He looks around his room and sighs before getting up off his bed and throwing some stuff around. Like the boxers that were laying on the floor and the Maxim that's been sitting on his desk atop his school books (and people say he can't prioritize...) He haphazardly makes his bed and shuts his closet, then there's a knock at the door and he tells whoever it is to come in.

He doesn't expect to see Rachel (in jeans) standing there looking all nervous. "Hey," is all he can manage.

"Hi," she says. He's just kind of looking at her, and she's not sure what that means, so she walks into the room and sits down on his bed(!). "So I know it's unexpected that I just drop by, and I understand if you think I'm completely unstable, but I've just been going a little crazy, and I thought maybe I could talk to you. If that's okay."

"Uh. Sure." He sits down next to her and she gives him a smile that doesn't freak him out. "What's up?"

"It's about Finn."

"Thanks for the warning," he mumbles.

"Pardon me?"

"Nothing," he says, shaking his head. He's kinda glad she didn't hear him.

"Oh, well, I just...this isn't easy for me to say, so I'd appreciate if you didn't ridicule me," she says seriously. He rolls his eyes and nods his head. Doesn't she know by now that he isn't about to make fun of her anymore? Well, not seriously, anyway. "I have a question about...boys. And sex. And how badly they really want it."

He's just kind of blinking at her, because is she really talking to him about _this_? But then he balls his fist. "Finn isn't...like, being a dick about things, or..."

"No!" she cries, aghast. "No, of course not. We've only been together a few weeks, Noah. We're not...It's not going that fast."

"Okay, so why're you..."

She sighs and turns toward him a little bit more. "It's just...we'll be...you know, kissing and whatever, and..."

He raises his brow and smirks. "And whatever?"

"Noah," she practically snaps. He thinks the blush on her cheeks is really hot. He could get really used to making her do that.

"Okay, I'm sorry," he says sincerely.

"So we'll be...you know, making out, and then he'll just stop. He'll pull away, and I don't know...I mean, I guess I know _why_, but..." She scowls when Noah starts laughing.

"He would so hate you if he knew you were telling me this," he says, shaking his head. Her eyes meet his, and he doesn't make a face or smirk or anything. "I won't say anything to him."

"Thank you."

"So what'd you need me for?" he asks. What he wants to ask is (one) why the fuck she's coming to him for advice all of a sudden and (two) doesn't she have any chick friends who can help her with this shit? "I don't see the problem. Your boyfriend thinks you're so hot that he can't control his...urges."

She blushes again and smiles at him. "Thank you for phrasing it that way. The problem is that sometimes...Sometimes I don't want to stop," she admits quietly.

Puck's mouth goes dry as he takes all this information in. Hot girl, sitting on his bed, telling him that she likes making out and doesn't want to stop.

And there's not a fucking thing he can do about it.

"Well, uh," he mumbles before clearing his throat. "So, again, what do you need my help with?"

"I just thought you might have some advice about what I can do. I mean...for..." She closes her eyes and flops back on his bed dramatically.

(The sliver of skin between her sweater and her jeans? Not helping him right now.)

"Rach."

"Never mind. This is embarrassing. I shouldn't have said anything."

"Rachel," he says. She drapes her arm over her eyes, and he laughs softly. He reaches for her wrist and tugs her towards him until she's sitting up in front of him again. "Look, not all guys can handle a whole lot of...that..." (see? he's being all delicate and shit) "...without, you know, incident. It's not, like, wrong or anything."

"No, I know that. I mean, I figured," she admits.

"I mean, me? I can make out for _hours_." He smirks at her roguishly, and he fully expects her to lay into him about being inappropriate.

"I know," she says softly. And maybe they didn't make out for hours, but they made out for a while. Like, a good 45 minutes. And she liked it. A lot.

"So just give him a little time. Eventually he'll work up a bit more resistance to your sexy ass."

"Noah!" she laughs, shoving him a little. He smiles and looks to his lap. "So you're saying that I should just keep kissing him as much as possible."

He inwardly cringes. Finn, the lucky fuck. "Sounds terrible, huh?"

(It does to him.)

She smiles and bites her lip.

He hates his life. This is what he has to deal with to have her as a friend? Maybe he should have stuck with the original plan.

(And the original plan was to stay as far away from Rachel Berry and all her crazy as possible. He wishes she wasn't so fucking hot, because it'd be easier to ignore her if she was a fuggo.)

She hangs out for a while, talks to him about his room and his mom (who she says is lovely, which makes him question Rachel's sanity for about the millionth time). She tells him she's already done her homework for the weekend (of course she is) and he says he might think about getting around to doing his later. Naturally, she's having none of that.

She walks over to his desk and grabs his school books. The Maxim is on display, then, and he cringes and apologizes. She surprises the hell out of him by picking it up.

So now he's got Rachel laying on her stomach on his bed, leafing through a Maxim and reading the articles ("for advice!" she says) as he sits there with his back against his headboard (her head is right next to his hips; he's clearly a genius) and does his homework. Homework! He doesn't think he's done homework on a weekend in like, a year and a half.

He doesn't know how much sense any of it makes, because Rachel keeps reading things out loud that she finds interesting. He's too distracted to put much effort into figuring it out.


	4. Chapter 4

Rachel and Quinn are walking down the hall together, and Quinn has a little ziplock bag full of cookies with pink icing on them in her hand. The girls are laughing and talking, and Rachel says something that makes Quinn throw her head back.

Puck and Finn are watching this, standing there like two idiots, because since when are Quinn and Rachel actually _friends_? The guys look at one another, then back to the girls, and Quinn walks up, holding up the bag of treats in her hand. Her face is flushed from laughing, and Rachel tucks her hair behind her ear coyly (she always does things like that in front of Finn, and don't ask Puck why he knows this; it's not because he's always watching her or anything).

"Look what Rachel made me," Quinn says triumphantly.

"Why?" Puck asks, as though it's just about the weirdest thing in the world. It might be, actually.

"Because I thought it might be nice for Quinn to have a treat for third period. I know she gets hungry around this time, since she's always excusing herself from history class to get something from her locker," Rachel explains. "This way, she won't have to miss any of today's review for our test on Thursday."

Puck wonders if Rachel ever does anything without thinking it all out logically first.

"That's sweet," Finn says, looking at her adoringly.

Puck rolls his eyes. "Where're our cookies?" he asks.

"_You_ don't get any," Quinn says, looping her arm through Rachel's. "You're the one who made me _need_ a snack. Not getting cookies is your punishment."

She laughs, and Rachel giggles as they wave and make their way down the hall. Puck and Finn are left standing there wondering just how long that friendship is going to last and how strong it's going to get. Because _fuck_. Girls _talk_. That's probably not the best thing for either of them.

"She _does_ know that you and Rachel are together, right?" Puck asks. Finn looks at him all confused. "You think this is like, some weird ploy to get her close, then stab her in her sleep or something?"

Finn just laughs and shakes his head, then tells Puck he'll see him later.

When Puck gets home after basketball practice, he's exhausted and just wants to take a shower and play some Halo. When he gets to his room, there's a little plate of cookies sitting on his bed with a note that says _"Quinn won't share, but I will - R". _He looks around his room for some reason, almost like he's expecting her to be there or something. When his sister comes in, she tells him _'that pretty girl' _came and dropped off the cookies, and he scowls at her and tells her to get out of his room. (He knows Rachel is pretty. He doesn't need a reminder, thanks.)

He eats one of the cookies and grabs his phone, types out a thank you to Rachel, and sits back on his bed, wondering if she gave Finn cookies too.

That inevitably turns to him thinking about Finn and Rachel together, and what she gives him when they're alone, and Puck grumbles and decides he needs to hit something, so he calls Matt and they head to the gym together.

----

Puck is sitting alone in his bedroom on Saturday afternoon, lazily strumming his guitar and humming some melodies he made up a while ago. He's being a total bum, but his mom's at work and his sister's at a friend's place, and he's got the place all to himself. He's not about to give this up. He never gets the house to himself, so his plan for the day is to do whatever the fuck he wants.

His fingers are starting to hurt after a while, but he doesn't really care. Actually, he doesn't really notice until his phone rings and he takes his hands off the strings to answer. He's more than a little surprised to see Rachel's name flashing on his screen.

"'S'goin' on, Berry?"

"Good evening, Noah," she says. He cranes his neck to look out the window. He hadn't even realized it had gotten dark. Time flies. "How are you?"

"'M'good. You?"

"Right. Well, I could be better," she says. "Don't be alarmed, nothing's wrong. I just...well, my fathers have gone out for the evening, and they won't be returning until well after midnight, and while I've stayed home by myself before, I was just watching the news and there was a story about a series of armed robberies in the area, and I..."

"Scaredy cat," he says childishly.

"Call it what you will. I'm just a little...on edge," she says. He doesn't say anything, and she doesn't really know what that means. "So I thought that maybe if you didn't have other plans, you might like to come over?"

He smiles to himself. She sounds so quiet and shy. He thinks it's cute. (He's never, ever been the guy to think a girl is 'cute'. She just _is_. It's annoying.)

"You gonna make me do anything weird?" he asks. (He's already set his guitar down and is looking through his closet for a shirt with actual sleeves.)

"Weird?"

"You know, like, watch musicals or...I dunno...comb kittens, or whatever it is you do in your spare time."

She laughs and it makes him smile. "I don't own any animals, and you can pick a movie if we decide to watch one."

"Will you feed me?"

"Noah! This isn't a contract negotiation! Are you coming or not?" she asks. He can almost picture her scowling at him.

"I love it when you get bossy, babe," he says, lowering his tone a little. She lets out a little hug, and he's sure she stamps her foot. "I'll be there in a bit. I need a secret knock or something?"

"Don't tease me," she orders him.

"Relax, Berry. I'll see you in a few."

When she hangs up the phone, she feels a million times better already. Finn is in Cleveland with his mom for the weekend, and when she called him earlier, he told her to call someone and invite over company. She's not entirely sure he meant for her to invite over Noah, but when she thinks about it, if she can't have Finn with her, the only person she can really think she'd feel comfortable with is Noah. She could have called Kurt, the two would have just been scared together. Tina is out with Artie, and Mercedes has some family thing, and the 'popular' gleeks are most definitely at a party. She's actually a little surprised Noah isn't there. She'll have to ask him about that later.

She's making hot cocoa when she hears a noise at the back of the house. It sounds like someone's trying to get in, and she hits the floor, her heart beating a million miles a minute as she crawls to the only corner in the kitchen where she knows she can't be seen. There's a noise at the patio door, tapping on the window, and she closes her eyes and literally prays for nothing to happen to her. Her life's dreams haven't come true yet. It's not her time. She should have known to leave her car in the driveway instead of pulling it into the garage. She should have left more lights on. She should have called Noah before dark.

She practically jumps out of her skin when there's a loud knock at the door. It could be Noah, but there's no way she's going to answer. The doorbell rings and she swears she's about to cry any second. Her phone rings on the counter, and she jumps up to grab it before sinking back against the cabinets again.

"Noah!"

"You gonna let me in, or what? Jesus. I've been standing here for five minutes."

The door flies open and Rachel throws her arms around his neck. He kind of laughs as he holds her up and tries to ignore the way her eyelashes flutter against his temple and how her lips are touching his ear. She's literally shaking.

Okay, so he's not entirely sure if heading to the back of the house and rattling the window was a good idea or not. On one hand, it worked, and instead of just making fun of her, he gets to hold her like this (her body is all pressed up against his and he isn't even sure her feet are on the floor). On the other hand, he kind of feels like a dick for freaking her out so bad.

"I heard a noise, and then I got really, really scared," she admits.

So now he has to make a decision. Does he tell her and risk her kicking him out or hating him all night, or does he lie and make it seem like he doesn't know anything?

It's not really a lie, is it?

"You're alright," he says soothingly. He runs one hand down her back and the other finds the back of her head. He walks them inside and closes the door, making sure she sees him lock it.

"Can you check the back ones?" she asks shyly, pulling away from him and tucking her arms into the sleeves of her sweater. He smiles at her when she looks up at him. "I'm sorry. I'm being such a baby."

"It's okay. I think you're good though."

The way he says it and the way he looks _when_ he says it have her narrowing her eyes up at him. (Oh fuck. Now she can tell when he's lying!? He's so screwed.) Then she balls her fist and punches his chest repeatedly as he tries to grab her wrists. She keeps calling him a jerk, over and over, and he actually laughs, because she's _so_ insane.

"I can't believe you did that!" she cries. He's got both her wrists in his hands and he's standing right in front of her. "You knew how scared I was!"

"Berry, it's _me_. You _can_ believe it. You just don't want to," he tells her.

(She hates it when she's wrong.)

"I was making hot chocolate and everything. Now it's ruined. And you're not getting anything!" She flips her hair over her shoulder and stomps away into the kitchen, and the only thing he can think of is how hot she looks when she's mad. "But don't leave!" she calls out to him.

He laughs to himself, then kicks off his shoes and takes off his jacket. He sits down at the end of the sofa and rests his feet on the coffee table (he's seen her dad doing it so he knows it's okay). He listens to her banging around in the kitchen and he shakes his head. It's pretty funny how mad she actually is.

She walks into the living room with one mug of steaming liquid, and she sits down at the other end of the sofa. He thinks this is the longest he's ever been in her presence without her speaking.

She doesn't switch on the television or any music or say a word. There's a clock on the mantle that is ticking the seconds away, and he watches her as she stares straight ahead at the black TV screen as she sips her cocoa. She tucks her legs beneath her (she's wearing jeans) and pulls the blanket off the back of the sofa to drape it over her feet.

He hates that he thinks she looks so hot right now. Like, really, _really_ hot. The kind of hot that he's finding it hard to be around. And maybe, he thinks, that all has something to do with how quiet she's being. When she isn't flapping her lips, they look all full and pouty, and she actually remembers to breathe. She's blinking slowly, and she tucks her hair behind her ear or toys with the fringe of the blanket to keep her hand occupied.

Fifteen minutes go by and he can't take it anymore.

"Hey," he says, angling his body towards hers a little more. "I'm sorry."

Her crazy ass smile comes back and she shifts so she's facing him full on. "Thank you, Noah."

And just like that, he's forgiven.

Weird.

"So uh...you really okay then?" he asks. See, he figures that if he can make himself sound all nonchalant, she won't start to think that he's into her or something.

"You'll be happy to hear that my blood pressure has returned to normal, yes."

He looks at her and tries not to laugh. "Right on."

She asks him if he wants to watch a movie, and he says yes for two reasons. One, he doesn't know what else they'd do if they didn't. And two, he thinks she wants to. She surprises him by opening a big cabinet by the television to look through a massive collection of DVDs. She waves him over and he stands behind her (he can smell her citrusy shampoo and almost feel her body heat). He honestly didn't expect her to have like, good movies. But she does. They're all organized alphabetically by genre, so he steers clear of the musicals and Disney movies (which, she explains, she has all of; says it like she's proud of it or something). He's looking through the titles and he settles on Casino Royale, and she looks at him with this little smile on her face and gleam in her eye.

"What?" he asks.

"I love this movie."

"Really?" he asks in surprise. "Doesn't seem like your type." She just shrugs her shoulder.

He's captivated by her.

He really, really needs to stop developing...things...for his best friend's girls.

She has him set up the movie while she makes popcorn and gets them some drinks, and it's kind of strange to her, how comfortable she is alone with him in her house. There's that whole nervous/not nervous, Finn/Puck comparison. She still isn't really sure what it means.

But they sit and watch this kick ass movie together, and he honestly thinks she's swooning and shit as she watches Daniel Craig beat guys up. Puck doesn't know who the hell this girl is. He wishes he could figure it out.

At one point, when Bond is standing in the bathroom with his shirt off and a glass of scotch, Rachel lets out this little sound and it makes Puck look at her.

"Sorry," she says shyly. "This is my favourite part." He raises his brow, and she's sure he thinks that she only likes it because of the shirtlessness. "Look at him. He's just had this intense, emotional fight, killed someone, and he's all battered. But this shows he's...he's _human_. He needs a moment to compose himself."

"Right," Puck says. He finds himself completely caught up in what she's saying.

"He takes a drink, washes his hands, and that's that. He's a professional and he has a job to do, so he's going to go do it. It's admirable. It's beautiful."

Puck laughs and shakes his head at her. "It's _badass_."

She giggles a little and looks at him from the corner of her eye. "That too," she says.

They both turn their attention back to the television. He spends the rest of the movie thinking about her.

She can feel him watching her sometimes, when she knows he's not interested in the film (not remarkably, all the parts with the love story). She doesn't look at him, for fear of what she'll see or what he'll say or what she might do. She likes just sitting here with him. But she's become so accustomed to watching movies with someone's arm around her that it feels cold and strange and impersonal to sit with three feet of space between them as they finish watching the movie.

When it's over, she stands and stretches her arms over her head, and he sees the smooth skin of her back when her shirt rides up. She turns off the television and switches on the stereo, and it's the second time he's been at her place when she's turned on some R&B. Every time he thinks he's learned something huge about her, he learns something more.

When she sits down again, she's facing him, and she drapes the blanket over her legs. He turns toward her a little more, and she smiles at him, and for once in his life, he thinks that just talking with a girl would be kinda nice and stuff. It's still pretty early, and he doesn't know when she wants him to leave.

(He wants to stay.)

"Who is this?" he asks, mostly just to make conversation.

"Charlie Wilson," she says, scrunching her face cutely, like she's trying to see if he recognizes the name. "Daddy loves him. He was also in the Gap Band."

"It's not bad," Puck admits. Rachel smiles. "I like it. Didn't know you were into so much R&B, Berry."

"It may come as a shock, but it might be one of my favourite genres. There's just something so relaxing about it, you know? I was actually really happy when we got to work on No Air. That's one of my favourites. I mean, I know it's not quite the same as this kind of R&B, but...it was a nice change from the classic rock vein we'd been a little stuck in," she says.

He listened. To every single word of that whole rant. (Don't worry. He's surprised too.)

"We do a bunch of popular tunes," he says. "I mean, it's not all classic rock."

"Mostly."

He laughs at the offended look on her face, but thinks better of reminding her that she can sing absolutely everything and Finn's only ever 'excellent' when he sings the classics. He's pretty sure she'd be pissed, and she'd probably tear a strip off him, explaining why he's wrong. He's not really up for that.

He smirks at her and raises one brow. (She's almost certain there's a sexual comment coming.) "Well hey, if you wanna re-enact that whole Push It routine, I mean..."

"Noah!" she cries. He laughs at how red her face goes. "Not my finest moment, I'll admit."

(He might just disagree.)

"Seriously, Berry? You wore _knee pads_," he says. She buries her face in her hands, and he watches the colour creep over her collarbone and disappear beneath her shirt. "You have any idea what that does to a guy? I think Jacob had to change his underwe..."

"Stop!" she cries laughingly. "Don't...That's just..._ugh_."

He doesn't think he's ever heard her not say a million words and make her point. "He's sweet on you," he says. What can he say? He just loves teasing her.

"Oh, I am well aware of that," she says. "He's made it perfectly clear that he, _quote_, wants to impregnate me and name our baby Ishmael."

Puck makes a face, and Rachel purses her lips. "Dude, that's...forward."

"What it _is_, is absolutely disgusting. It's borderline sexual harassment, actually. I honestly don't know why he feels the need to be so...repugnant."

"Sounds like someone needs an ass-kicking," he says seriously.

Her eyes snap over to meet his, and she looks all serious. "Don't you dare," she says dangerously. "As much as I'd love for his advances to stop, I don't believe that you punching him in the face is the only way to accomplish that."

"Debatable." He smirks wickedly and raises his brow. "I could punch him somewhere else."

"Noah, I'm asking you to please, not resort to physical violence. Our parents go to the same synagogue, and it wouldn't be in my best interest. Please, Noah. For me."

He sighs and rolls his eyes at her. "Fine," he mumbles. "I won't hit him."

(He wonders why Finn hasn't taken measures to stop this creep from hitting on Rachel. Seems a little weird.)

They talk a while longer, until her dads call (as promised) and say they're 20 minutes away, and she tells Noah that he can leave if he wants to.

(He doesn't want to.)

She walks him to the door and turns the lock while he pulls on his jacket. "Thank you for coming, Noah. You really didn't have to. I'm sure you had more intriguing offers for your Saturday night."

He shrugs his shoulder and smiles at her. "Nah. This wasn't bad. I didn't, you know, wanna strangle you or anything."

(If she only knew...)

"Progress, then," she laughs. He wonders if she really means it, but then she winks at him (seriously, she _winks_) and he knows she's joking.

"So I'll see you on Monday, then," he says.

She nods, then steps forward and wraps her arms around his waist, her head resting on his chest. He leans down a little bit, so that his head is almost laying atop hers, but he's pretty sure that'd be crossing some kind of line, so he stops himself.

"If you even think of scaring me again, I will despise you forever," she says. He laughs a little, his body shakes against hers before she pulls away.

"I won't. Promise." She smiles and pulls the door open. "Later, Berry."

"Goodbye, Noah."

She locks the door and leans back against it as she hears his truck start and pull out of the driveway.

She's brushing her teeth ten minutes later, still trying to figure out why that felt like a date.

----

Puck he doesn't hit Jacob.

He doesn't even touch him.

All he does is back the little freak up against a wall and say that if he ever fucking even thinks of talking to Rachel Berry like that again, he won't get a _chance_ to live to regret it.

That seems to do the trick.

Rachel doesn't ask questions, but she smiles at Puck in the hall when Jacob walks by her without so much as a second glance.

----

Rachel and Finn have been dating over a month, and while they go out all the time and spend a ton of time together alone (which she's not going to complain about) she's starting to wonder when he's going to be ready to go public with their relationship. The way she sees it, they have a stable foundation, and all their close friends know anyway.

She wonders what he's hiding from.

Actually, she wonders if he's ashamed to be with her or something, and it's not good for her self-esteem, or their relationship, to doubt him. She doesn't want to doubt him, she just is. She can't help it. He walks her to class, but doesn't touch her. He says goodbye, but doesn't kiss her. He'll sit next to her at lunch, but he won't put his arm around her like the other guys do with their girlfriends.

She doesn't want to want all that stuff so badly, since it's silly and kind of superficial. She just can't help it.

"Finn," she says one night as they lay on her bed, side by side, reading from their respective text books.

"Hmm?"

He's concentrating, that little crinkle in his brow that he always gets when he's trying to comprehend something he just hasn't picked up on yet. She thinks it's adorable. She sees it often.

"Don't you think it's time we took our relationship to the next level?" she asks. He looks over at her quickly, and she can tell by the expression on his face that he's thinking about something that she definitely doesn't mean. "No. Not that."

(But, she thinks she might be ready soon. Like, really soon. She's just smart enough not to give herself to a boy who doesn't even hold her hand in the hallway, no matter how much she likes him.)

"Okay, what do you mean?" he asks, closing his book, marking his page with his finger.

"What I mean is that I believe that you and I are close enough now, together enough, that maybe it's time for us to stop worrying about what people might say if they see us together."

His brow furrows again in confusion. "Who's worried about that?" he asks.

"You are," she reminds him. She turns to him and tucks her legs beneath her. "I understand your desire to have a low-key relationship, but Finn, if you hadn't noticed? I'm not a low-key girl. I'm high maintenance. And I'm needy." He smiles and laughs a little. He's always saying he likes that she knows these things about herself. "And I need a man who isn't afraid to be seen with me."

He rears back and narrows his eyes at her. "Rachel, I'm not afraid to be seen with you," he assures her seriously.

She throws her hand in the air. "What am I supposed to assume?"

"We talked about this," he reminds her. "People know you're my girlfriend, okay? It's not like it's some secret. I just hate all that, like, high school stuff. I don't need you to hold my hand to know that you like me." She feels a pain in her heart, and she hopes she hides it well. "Okay?"

She plasters on a smile and leans forward to kiss him. "Okay."

But she's left wondering why he won't just humour her, why he won't do what she wants, even just a little bit. It's not like she's asking him to jump her in the hallway. It's not a statement, and it's not superficial. She likes holding his hand. She wonders why he doesn't feel the same way. She's always thought that when you liked someone, you wanted to get as much of them as possible. She thinks she likes him more than he likes her.

When he kisses her as he leaves her house, she finds herself thinking that he might never be able to catch up.

----

The next day, she's standing at her locker, organizing her books, and she feels a body behind her, and a pair of arms pins her in place. Her breath hitches and she turns around, only to find Puck standing there, a little too close. (But it's not necessarily uncomfortable, the way he's almost touching her, the way he's looking at her.)

"Noah, what are you...?"

"Talked with Finn," he says. She can smell his mouthwash. "Says you're freaking out about him not touching you enough."

She scowls at him and he isn't sure if the colour in her face is because of anger or arousal (he's hoping for the latter, as crazy as he knows that is). "Excuse me," she says, placing her hand on his chest to shove him away. "That isn't exactly the situation, and I'll thank you not to make assumptions or paraphrase at will."

She doesn't know how she can have sweet moments with him, like that night at her house, and then all of a sudden, he's invading her personal space and adding his two cents about her relationship.

Their relationship is volatile, at best.

(There's a part of her, a small part, a part that controls that fluttering in her stomach, that loves that their relationship, if it can be called that, is never boring.)

"Whatever, Berry. You made me sing like a dork in front of the whole glee club to prove I was badass enough to be with you. What're you making him do?" he asks.

She ignores the fact that he raises a very valid point. He's standing next to her now, still just a little too close (she wonders, for a split second, what cologne he wears; it's lovely). "This isn't the same situation, Noah, and I know you're aware of that."

"I just think it's funny, Rach, that you'll let him get away with shit that I know you wouldn't let anyone else get away with. You really like him that much?" he asks.

When she turns to look at him, her eyes are narrowed. She doesn't know why he cares so much. He's the one who's helped her with Finn the most, and now it seems like he's trying to break them up or something, or at least make her question her relationship with her boyfriend.

The truth is, she doesn't need his help with that right now.

She takes a deep breath, and he's sure she's about to cry any second.

"Fuck, don't...don't like, start crying or something," he says quietly, almost sweetly. "Sorry if I'm being a jerk, but I just don't get it."

"You don't have to understand, Noah. If I may be so blunt, my relationship isn't for you to worry about," she says. He looks to the floor, but she thinks she catches a glimpse of something in his eyes (they look really green today, and she knows by now that they're easier to read when they're this shade). "Unless...Unless perhaps there's something you're not telling me."

He looks up at her like she's crazy, and she's almost certain he's going to call her insane for even implying anything of the sort. But then Finn walks over and looks between the two of them. Rachel seriously wonders if Puck just put on that whole act just to make Finn jealous again.

"What's up?" Finn asks wearily.

"Nothing," Rachel says with a smile. "Noah was just playfully tormenting me. Nothing new."

Their eyes meet again and she knows he wasn't just putting on an act. There's that indeterminable emotion in his eyes again. She thinks it might be sadness. Her chest gets tight, wondering just what's going through his head. (Or maybe his heart.)

"C'mon. I'll walk you to class," Finn says. He turns to Puck and says a goodbye.

Puck watches the way Rachel looks up at Finn with the sweetest smile known to man when he rests his hand on the small of her back as they walk down the hall.

Basically? He's fucked. Rachel's onto him and he's _fucked_.

----

He keeps his distance for the better part of a week. Literally and figuratively. He avoids the part of the hallway where her locker is, and he sits as far away from her as possible in rehearsal. He volunteers to babysit his sister one day after school when his mom takes an extra shift, just so he can get out of glee practice. He doesn't look at her when he can feel her looking at him, and he makes up excuses to walk away when Finn starts talking about Rachel in passing.

Cutting ties. Smart. Hard to do, but smart. It's a self-preservation thing. Besides, he's pretty sure she doesn't notice anyway. It's all good.

But she does notice. She can tell the way he's pulling away from the group, from her. His effort in glee is lackluster at best, and she's seen him loitering in other hallways, three classes worth of books in his hands so he can avoid passing her in the hall. She sees him look away when she turns the corner, and she can see the way he restrains himself from glancing her way when she's staring at him.

(Well, it's not really staring. She's just trying to get him to look at her. It's not like she's noticing how full his lips are or how his eyes change colour based on the lighting in any given room, or what he's wearing. No. She's just trying to catch his eye.)

She decides she's going to put an end to it. She doesn't know what's really going on with him, but she thinks there are two possibilities, and one is more believable than the other.

One option is that he's interested in her, which just seems like such an impossibility (though her head is screaming that it's probably the truth.)

The other is that he's jealous of her monopolizing his best friend's time.

So she comes up with a rather genius plan and puts it into motion. Getting Finn on board is easy. Tracking down Noah is the hard part.

After observing his habits for a week (and yes, she's taking it this seriously) she's well aware of what he does at the nurse's office, and that his math class aligns with her second period class on Friday. She knows he goes in there to sleep when he feels like slacking (okay, he doesn't put it like that, but she does), and she knows he waits until Nurse Solomon goes for her coffee break, then sneaks out and just loafs around for a period.

"Hi Noah," she says, skipping up to him at his locker. He glances at her, a smile on his face, but he wonders how she can be so chipper all the time. And also how he's been avoiding her. And also maybe why he's acting like he's happy to see her or something.

(Oh. Right. Because he is. Dammit.)

"'Sup, Berry?"

"What are you doing tonight?" she asks.

He turns and raises his brow, then leans against the bank of lockers. "Nothing, but I could be persuaded."

"Finn and I are going to the basketball game over at the college. My dad was supposed to come but now he can't, so we have an extra ticket, and I thought..."

"No thanks," he scoffs, turning back to his locker.

"How come? It'll be fun, I think. I'm not the biggest fan of these particular teams, but I do enjoy the game. And I..."

"Rachel, I said no," he says seriously.

She's more than a little surprised at the curt, almost mean nature of his reply. But she sets her shoulders and puts her hand on her hip. "And why not?"

"Because I don't do the whole third wheel thing," he tells her hotly, like it should be obvious. "I'd rather punch myself in the junk than sit with you and Finn all night. So no thanks."

"Noah, I think you're being rude," she states. She surprises herself with the statement. She doesn't usually talk back to him, not like this. He notices it too.

"Oh, really?" he asks, turning to her. He gets in her face a little bit, so he's standing over her and looking down at her. His forearm is jammed against the wall to her left. Anyone else would be intimidated. She's not. "I don't think I am. Actually, I think you're a little dense if you honestly think I want to go on a date with you and your boyfriend."

"We're all friends," she says. There's that look in his eye again as he laughs humorlessly and shakes his head a little bit. "Aren't we?"

"Sure."

(She doesn't think he believes it, and it breaks her heart a little.)

"So why won't you...?"

"Just drop it," he says quietly. She's not sure she's ever seen him this vulnerable.

(Maybe that option she doesn't want to believe is the most accurate.)

She looks at him, big brown eyes all conflicted (and yeah, he can tell they are) and takes a quiet breath in the empty hallway.

"I don't want to," she admits.

She watches his eyes soften and his shoulders slump just a little bit. He lets out a breath and shakes his head, and she thinks he's holding something back. She doesn't miss the way he glances at her lips quickly. (He can't help it. They're right there, and they're all pouty and shiny.)

"Have fun tonight," he says.

His hand brushes hers as he walks past, and she's left standing there, wondering why she feels so _terrible_.


	5. Chapter 5

He thinks that looks really should be able to kill. It'd be fucking sweet, first of all, and second of all, it'd come in really handy right about now, when Mr. Schue's telling him that he's going to have to work with Rachel to extend his range. He's successfully avoided her for a week since that whole...incident...in the hall (when, if he's being honest, he almost kissed her).

Leave it to Mr. Schue to ruin his fucking life.

Okay, so maybe that's a little harsh, but he thinks it, because Rachel's looking at him with a fake-ass smile on her face, and he just knows she's going to walk over any minute and start talking at him a mile a minute, and then Finn's gonna do that glaring thing that makes him look constipated, and Puck's gonna be pissed off that a, he doesn't have Rachel and b, Finn still doesn't trust him. He's got this part all memorized.

He decides to high tail it out of the choir room as soon as practice is over in hopes of avoiding all that shit. There are things he doesn't need in his life, and all this bullshit? He could do without it.

She literally terrifies him. He's standing at his locker, grabbing his shit so he can get the fuck home, and when he closes the door, she's standing _right there_. He actually jumps and then closes his eyes, because he's trying to figure out how she did that (seriously, she's like a fucking ninja or something) and he's trying to get his heart to stop beating so hard and fast.

"Noah, come to my house at 7:00 tomorrow, and we'll begin work on your range. You really do need to be able to hit a high B. I think you could even go to a C if you really worked at it."

"Do I get a say in this?" he asks, pulling his jacket over his arms.

She looks at him, straightens her posture, and says, "no," and he honestly believes her. No, he _doesn't_ get a say.

"Tomorrow's Friday," he notes.

"Congratulations, Noah," she says patronizingly, patting his shoulder. He glances at her hand like it's some strange foreign object. "You know the days of the week."

He smirks at her and raises his brow. "Sarcasm, Berry? Really?"

She shrugs her shoulder and he can tell she wants to smile. "7:00. Don't be late or I won't be pleasant."

She turns on her heel and starts walking down the hall. "Because you're such a fuckin' peach now," he says to her retreating form.

"Some people think so!" she calls over her shoulder.

He finds himself laughing at her joke. He likes that she's not taking herself so seriously these days. He wonders why that is.

Rachel's left walking down the hall towards the exit, thinking about how he refuses to hang out with she and Finn, but he has no problem hanging out with just her. Sure, it's a glee sanctioned meeting, but he certainly didn't argue her too hard on it.

She has no idea what to do with the knowledge that there's a possibility he feels more for her than just friendship. She thinks she might just ignore it altogether.

But then again, that hasn't been working too well for her for the past week. She knows he's been avoiding her again. And she hates it. She's grown accustomed to his comments and barbs about her wardrobe and her vernacular. She's missed the way he rolls his eyes when she talks a little too long about something he doesn't care about, or when she's smiling at Finn.

She's come to realize that she likes the attention he gives her, even if it isn't necessarily the best kind. It's not like the way Finn looks at her, or the way he sweetly tells her to use shorter words. Puck does it differently. He's blunt and brash and abrasive in a different way than she is.

(She's been thinking about him too much.)

----

When he pulls into her driveway, he notices the absence of the two black sedans that are usually parked there. The only car in the driveway is her little silver hybrid, so he parks behind it and gathers his thoughts before opening the door and stepping out. He figures the sooner he gets inside, the sooner he can get this shit over with, and then maybe he can have the rest of his Friday night to drink the beer he has hidden in the back of the fridge in the garage at his house.

He knows immediately that a wrench will be thrown in that plan, because when Rachel opens the door, her eyes are all red and she doesn't even say hello before turning around and walking into the house. He thinks that might be an invitation? He walks in anyway.

He doesn't know her house super well, but he walks over to where the piano is, and she's sitting there with a cup of tea on a little table, her posture straight. He doesn't know her as well as he wants to, but he knows that when she tries to hide the fact that something's wrong, that's when something is _really_ wrong.

"Hey, uh...are you okay?" he asks skeptically, for fear of getting his head bitten off. She just nods and positions her hands on the keys. "Is this because I'm late? 'Cause there was an accident on Nordic and I had to take Abby, which is way longer."

She actually laughs a little bit and looks up at him. There are tears in her eyes and he hates this desire he has to make her feel better.

"I'm fine, really. It's nothing," she says. She knows it's not convincing.

"I'm not gracing you with my sexy singing voice until you tell me why you're crying," he says, crossing his arms over his chest. She attempts a glare, but he thinks she actually just looks cute. "C'mon. What's up."

He sits down on the piano bench and pushes her over with his hip so they can both sit comfortably. She takes a deep breath and lets it out dramatically, and she runs her hands over her face.

"It's about Finn."

"Of course," Puck mumbles. She looks at him questioningly, and he realizes how close they are, his arm brushing against hers. "Just figured. You're a girl with a boyfriend and you're crying. Not rocket science." She smiles at him and he bumps her shoulder with his. "What is it?"

He honestly doesn't know what makes him so..._nice_...around her. He's not normally this nice around anyone. Anyone. Maybe like, his family, but that's different, and he can even be a jerk with them, because they know who he is. But there's something about Rachel that just makes him turn into this sort of decent guy.

(And okay, maybe he's thinking that if she and Finn are on the outs, he can take advantage of that breakup. Nobody said he was perfect.)

"I just never know where I stand with him," she admits quietly. "Things will be going along perfectly, and then all of a sudden, he's taking two steps back. I was talking with Quinn this afternoon, and he got a little weird, and when he drove me home, he said he'd call me, but it wasn't a firm plan, and he always makes those. So when I asked him about it, he said it's weird that his exes are friends, and then I said that it's weird that he's friends with his ex, and then he brought you up, and it was just a whole big thing."

"Alright, well take a breath, 'kay? 'Cause I don't dig how red your face is right now," he says. She rolls her eyes, but complies. "So what'd he say about me?"

(Alright, so he's curious for a few reasons. He wants to know how he came between the two of them. Is that so wrong?)

"He said that you and I have this weird tension between us, but that's just ridiculous. Isn't it? And then he kind of blew up at me a little because he said that I'm blind to it and it scares him, because one night you'll get me drunk on wine coolers or something? I don't really know what that means," she says. Puck winces and looks at her pointedly. "Oh. Oh!" She claps her hand over her mouth. "Well...well that won't be a problem."

She sure knows how to make a guy feel like crap, doesn't she?

"So he's jealous."

"But _why_ though?" she asks in frustration. "Why would he be jealous? I've done nothing but...but want _him_ since the beginning of the year!"

Puck looks at her with a raised brow. "That's not entirely true. You were with me."

"For a week!"

"A week where every time he looked at me, he was two steps away from kicking my ass," he explains. "Berry, the guy is fucking...crazy about you, okay?"

"So why doesn't he trust me?" she asks, swiping a tear from her cheek.

She turns to him and their eyes lock, and she feels a little breathless with the way he's looking at her. She doesn't think she's ever seen him look so sweet, and despite the fact that his speech is still laced with profanities, he's being nice to her. Maybe nicer than he has to be. Something Finn said is repeating in her head. _Puck doesn't act with anyone else the way he acts with you._ She thinks there might be a little truth to that.

"Does he have a reason not to?" he asks.

She looks at him for a moment, and she opens her mouth twice, only to close it and not say anything. She's very aware of what he's asking her, and she's afraid that if she answers, it'll change everything, either way. If she says no, he'll be hurt and it'll mess up their friendship. If she says yes, then she _knows_ he'll kiss her, and she can't let that happen.

And is Finn right? Does he have a reason to worry? Does he have a reason to question her? She wanted him so hard, so bad, wished for him on shooting stars and eyelashes and all that silly stuff, and now she has him, and there's something about it all that just doesn't feel right. But she _wants_ it to be right, and she's not going to let confusion and strange feelings for this boy get in the way of anything.

"We should get started," she says, turning back to the piano. "Would you like a tea? Anything to soothe your vocal chords?"

He stands and clears his throat, almost like he's trying to forget they ever had that conversation. "No. I'm good. Let's just do this."

It doesn't really surprise him how she immediately goes into professional mode or whatever. She straightens her posture and rests her hands over the keys, and she starts going on about notes and range and what he needs to be able to hit, pressing the key over and over. The thing is, he's not an idiot. He knows enough about music. Actually, he knows he could be doing this himself, without her help. Not to say that she doesn't know it better. Sure, he'd be able to hit the note on his own, but she talks about breathing and technique and tone, and he thinks he might actually be _learning_. And she's not a bad teacher, either.

He hits the note, and it's a little strained, but she smiles anyway, like he's just made her day or something. She takes her hands off the keys and claps a little bit, excitedly, and he lets himself smile at her, because, okay, he isn't having the worst time, despite the way this whole thing started out.

"Noah, you sound really great," she says seriously. "Your voice is lovely."

"Thanks," he mumbles. He wonders if she has any idea that every time she says something like that, he wants to grab her and kiss her. He fucking hates that he can't. He checks the time on the clock, and it's been an hour of him doing scales and stuff, and he thinks that's plenty. And he needs to get away from her. "I'm gonna take off."

He half expects her to tell him that he can't leave until it's perfect, but she just smiles, nods her head and stands up to walk him to the door. He thinks he's going to get out of there without another word, and that'd be awesome, because he really doesn't need anything else, any more words, to make him want to stay.

"Hey," she says, laying her hand on his forearm as he reaches for the doorknob. "I'm sorry about earlier. I was just...freaking out a little bit."

"Yeah. Fine."

"I just feel like I'm always dumping my problems on you," she admits. She's standing in front of him, and she feels so comfortable there, like he's not too tall and she's not too short. She can look up at him without hurting her neck, and she has a very vivid memory of what it's like when he hugs her.

"Yeah, well, I guess I'm used to it," he says with a shrug.

She doesn't know what he means by that, and she can't read him right now, and it's bothering her. She wants to know what he's thinking, what he's feeling, and she thinks that they're close enough friends, or at least they've talked enough, that she can ask him flat out.

But then she looks at him, and he's suddenly closer to her, standing not even a foot apart, and she can feel her breathing speed up. He's gorgeous, and he's standing right there, and she thinks that this whole evening, he's been vulnerable with her, and that might all mean something.

Before she can stop herself, she's leaning up on her toes and pressing her lips to his. It doesn't last long, and he doesn't reach out to touch her, but he kisses her back a little bit before she pulls away.

She turns around so her back is to him. "I'm so sorry. God, I don't know why I did that."

He doesn't say anything, doesn't respond at all, just walks out the door and closes it behind him.

He thinks maybe Finn's worries are necessary.

He wonders why the hell she insists on taking them _all_ down.

(He only left because he knows that if she'd turned around and looked at him again, he wouldn't have been able to control himself.)

----

She spends all of Saturday in her bedroom, awash with guilt, wondering why she did what she did and how she's going to make it right.

But then she'll remember that kiss and how she felt it deep in her stomach, and she wonders what that means. Why did she kiss him in the first place? Why did he kiss back? (Okay, so she knows the answer to that one.) Why did he just leave? Does he need an apology? Does Finn ever need to know? How would she tell him if that's what she decides to do?

There are tears in her eyes when she realizes that the only question she has an answer to is the one she'd most like to ignore.

(Noah has feelings for her.)

She finally leaves her house on Sunday afternoon, and she doesn't really know where she's going. She puts on some music and drives around town for a while, trying to clear her head. It doesn't work. Not at all.

And then she ends up at Noah's front door, and she knows this is a bad idea, but she's knocking before she can tell herself to turn around and leave.

His mom answers the door and fawns over Rachel. She plasters on her sweetest smile as his mother shouts up the stairs for him, and she answers a couple simple questions as she waits.

He looks absolutely shocked to see her when he comes down the stairs. "Hey."

"Hi," she says with a little wave. She watches his chest move as he takes a deep breath.

"Mom, we'll be upstairs." His mother gives him a weird look, but he seems to ignore it, and Rachel wonders how much his mom knows about her; if she knows Rachel is dating Finn.

Rachel follows him in silence as he leads her to his room, and he kicks the door shut behind them. It's not all the way closed, there's still a few inches of space peeking out into the hall. She wonders if that's a house rule before remembering that she has more important things to worry about.

"Let's hear it," he says. She looks at him in confusion and he rolls his eyes. "The apology, or the _'I'm so sorry and that can never happen again.'_ Lay it on me."

(His mind wanders on that last little phrase, because he thinks it sounds kinda hot and a little dirty, and he honestly wouldn't be able to stop her if that's where this all headed. Maybe that makes him an asshole, but he doesn't fucking care, because he's sick of being second best to Finn.)

"That's not why I came," she says meekly. She's playing with the strap of her bag, and it's annoying him, so he grabs it from her hand and tosses it carelessly onto his bed.

"Why, then?"

"You kissed me back," she says, finally looking up at him.

Fuck. He wasn't expecting that. "So?" he says, shrugging his shoulder.

"Noah, you've been acting strangely around me, and I had a hunch that perhaps...perhaps there was a deeper reason behind that. And then you were there, and you were looking at me like...It's just that no one's ever looked at me like that before, and I wanted to kiss you. I couldn't help it. And I don't know what that means. I'm more responsible than this, but then...then there are butterflies in my stomach, and...I'm afraid of what that means."

He honestly doesn't know how to respond. First she kisses him, then she shows up at his house looking all hot in jeans and a black button down shirt, and now she's telling him that he makes her feel _something_, that he looks at her like no one does (like Finn doesn't.) What the fuck does that even mean? And what's he supposed to do about it?

"Needless to say, I've never been in this situation," she says seriously. "I've never had one boy's undivided attention, let alone...let alone two." He's just standing there looking at her, and she wants him to say something, but she doesn't know what she wants to hear, so she keeps talking. "And I really wish this was easier."

"Things are fucking difficult sometimes, Berry. It happens," he says. He doesn't know why he's angry. Probably because nowhere in any of this is she saying that she's breaking up with Finn. He knew she wouldn't. It shouldn't piss him off so much now.

"They aren't difficult for me. Not like this. My life, relatively speaking, is free of drama." He tilts his head and smirks at her for the first time since she arrived. She lets herself smile at him. "Okay, it's free of _this kind_ of drama." They both laugh softly. He wonders why she's telling him any of this shit. "I wish it was easier."

"What's the problem?" he asks with a shrug of his shoulders. "Do you want me or him?"

She thinks about it for a second, and the answer is pretty clear, right there on the tip of her tongue. It comes to her instantly, no matter how uncomfortable it'll be to admit and who'll get hurt in the process.

"Him," she admits softly.

He laughs humourlessly and shakes his head. (He knew the answer before he asked the question.) "Exactly. Pretty fucking simple, isn't it?"

"But then...but then what's this?" she asks, taking a step towards him. He takes a step back. "Why do I feel...what I feel?"

He doesn't know why the fuck she's asking, because it's not like he can actually answer her. And if he did, she'd just argue him on it anyway, and he doesn't want to stand here as she lists off all the reasons why Finn's a better boyfriend or a better match or whatever. And Puck's used to girls only being physically attracted to him. He's hot, and he's a jerk, so he's pretty much only good for one thing, as far as they're concerned. He didn't know why he thought Rachel was any different.

(Maybe because she actually listens to him and seems to care about him and laughs at his jokes and helps him with things. Maybe it's that.)

He looks up at her again, and she's standing right in front of him, her eyes boring into his like she's trying to figure out exactly what he's thinking. It doesn't freak him out, and it _should_.

He needs to get her the fuck out of his room.

"Rachel, you should go," he says seriously. (She tries not to think of how good her name sounds when he says it.)

"I think we need to talk about..."

"If you stay here any longer, I..."

She doesn't miss the way he glances at her lips and he's so close that she can smell his cologne, and oh my god, she should _not_ be this attracted to him. It's not _right_.

"What?" she asks, looking up at him through her lashes.

"I really fucking want to kiss you, and you can't handle that," he says bluntly. She's speechless. "And if you think you _can_ handle it, and you let me, I can't fucking...there's no way I'm just going to stick to kissing you." Her face flushes red and she looks to the ground and takes a step back. "So go."

She bites her bottom lip and looks him in the eye again, and she thinks his hands are in his pockets to keep from grabbing her. He licks his lips subtly, and she doesn't know if it's on purpose, but it makes her almost shiver with the sensation of wanting him.

She can't help herself when she's around him. It's a _problem_.

She closes the distance between them and grabs the front of his shirt in her fist, pulling him towards her until his lips hit hers. He lets out this growl from the back of his throat, then his arm hooks around her waist and presses her close to him, and his other hand slips into her hair and cradles the back of her head. Her arms twine around his neck and she just _kisses_ him. And it feels good. _Too_ good. Too _much_. But not enough. It's confusing and her head is spinning, and it's so hot that she thinks if he tries to take it further, she won't stop him. His tongue moves against hers, and he tastes like coffee and chocolate, and it's sexy and sweet, and when he tucks his fingertips just beneath the waistband of her jeans at her back, she mewls involuntarily and melts against him a little more.

She's hot all over, her body buzzing, and it's not until he literally pushes her away that she even _thinks_ of stopping.

His eyes are still closed, his forehead against hers and his hands on her arms. "Dammit, Rachel," he breathes out.

"Noah." It's a whisper, and it makes him pull away. He looks into her eyes and she honestly feels naked.

"Get out."

She grabs her bag and she does as he tells her, because she's afraid of what'll happen if she stays, and if she asks him to tell her what he's thinking when he looks at her the way he does, she knows it'll only mean trouble.

More trouble.

----

She purposely schedules a meeting with one of her teachers on Monday before school (thank goodness for the faculty email directory). Then one with Miss Pillsbury for lunch. Then during glee rehearsal, she suggests they work on Mercedes and Tina's solos, respectively (so she won't have to look Finn in the eye or hold his hand).

She's a terrible girlfriend. She's an awful friend. She doesn't deserve either of them.

Only Noah knows why she's avoiding them both. So when he sits down next to her in glee rehearsal and leans over during Tina's number, she doesn't even acknowledge him.

Well, she doesn't let on.

But when he whispers, "you can't ignore him forever," into her ear, she feels a ball of guilt in her stomach, and she excuses herself so she can get away from him.

As she's standing in the washroom in front of the mirror, dabbing a cool, damp paper towel to her face, she tries to give herself a pep talk. _You can do this. You're a professional. You can work with them both. It's for the good of the group. Noah won't say anything to anyone. Everything will be fine._

"You okay?"

Rachel spins around to see Quinn standing next to her, arms folded and resting on her stomach. She still looks imposing, even seven months pregnant.

"I'm fine," Rachel says, trying to smile.

"You sure? Because one minute you're fine, then the next you're running out of practice. And I haven't seen you with Finn all day," Quinn points out. "Trouble in paradise?"

Rachel's first thought is that she's about as far away from paradise as any one person can get. She swallows the lump in her throat and starts washing her hands for no reason.

"Just a busy day, that's all. And the choir room is hot, don't you find?" She looks at Quinn, who's smiling like she knows some secret (Rachel knows it's impossible, but her heart falls anyway.)

"It is pretty warm in there. Especially with all Kurt's hot air about costumes and sequins," she says. They both laugh a little bit and Quinn splashes water onto her cheeks. "You sure you're alright?"

"Yes, Quinn. Thank you." She wonders if her acting skills are waning, because it usually doesn't take this much to convince anyone of anything.

"Okay, look," Quinn says, turning and forcing Rachel to face her. "I know the boy trouble face. I've had it for the better part of this whole year. So what's going on?"

"Quinn, I don't think it's appropriate for me to discuss my relationship with Finn, with you."

Quinn shrugs. "He talks about you with me." Rachel's face pales. She can feel it. She did _not_ know that bit of information. It bothers her. "Look, I know he really likes you, and I know he doesn't really know how to act. He thinks he's pushing you away, and he doesn't want to, but...well, he's kind of an idiot."

Rachel thinks she might start crying, because never has Finn said anything like that to her. She wonders why he's confiding in his ex instead of her. She wants him to think he can tell her things, otherwise, what are they even doing together?

"It'd be nice if he ever said that to me," Rachel says, looking to the floor. Quinn just smiles weakly and sighs. Rachel tries to smile, then starts towards the door.

"And Rachel?" Quinn says, stopping Rachel in her tracks. "I know what it's like to get caught up in Puck. Safe to say the repercussions aren't great." Rachel closes her eyes tightly, wondering just how transparent she is. "He said something to you and you bolted. No one else saw." The girls smile at one another, and Quinn says, "I don't know what's going on there. But talk to Finn."

Rachel leaves without another word. She's been thinking about talking to Finn all day. She's wanted a sign. She honestly didn't think it'd come in the form of his ex-girlfriend, or that it'd be so blunt.

She decides she needs to tell him the truth. It terrifies her, but she wants to be honest with him, and she wants him to be honest with her. She can't expect him to tell her everything if she's keeping secrets.

(And yet, the first thought in her head is worry over what he'll do to Noah when she tells him about the kiss.)

Her life is a _mess_.

----

Finn's sitting on her bed, watching her as she types something or another on her computer screen. She can feel his eyes on her, and it makes her uncomfortable. She doesn't know why he's staring.

"What?" she finally asks, laughing a little as she raises her eyes to meet his.

"Nothing," he says with a smile. "Just looking at you."

She smiles cutely and blows him a kiss, then goes back to her task, and she wonders how long she can keep doing this. He's already asked her if she was avoiding him at school, and she said no (another lie), that she was just busy. Now he's sitting in her bedroom, leaning back against her pillows, and she should want to kiss him. She really should. It's not that she doesn't want to, per se, she just feels too on edge to do it.

She's on her musical theater message board, changing her avatar from The Narrator from Joseph, to Zach from A Chorus Line, her current favourite.

"Finn," she says, peering at him over the top of her computer.

"What's up?" he asks casually. When he notices the look on her face, the nervous way she's picking at her index fingernail with her thumb, he knows something's wrong. "Rach, what is it?"

"Don't be mad," she says. His face falls. She stores that phrase away as one never to use on a boyfriend again.

"What?" he asks, a blend of skepticism, worry and anxiety in his tone.

"I kissed Noah," she confesses quietly. She feels somehow less and more guilty, all at the same time.

He blinks a few times and she doesn't move her eyes from his. "What?"

"It was just once, and...It was a mistake," she says. The first part is a lie, but she thinks the kiss at her house might not count. (She's a horrible person.)

(She wonders why she suddenly feels like she's lying about the last part too.)

"That son of a bitch," he says. He stands from his place and she follows him, placing her hand on his upper arm.

"Don't. Don't blame him. I kissed him, not the other way around."

He glares at her and takes a step backwards away from her. "Why would you do that, Rachel?"

"We were fighting, Finn!" she cries dramatically. "You were being irrational, and Noah came over because we had to work on that stuff for glee, and it just...happened. And I'm _sorry_."

"Can you just stop calling him Noah, okay? That's what his mom calls him, and she's the only one in the world who loves him," Finn says harshly.

(There a split second, a fleeting moment, where Rachel thinks that his mother isn't the only one.)

"His name is Noah, and I refuse to call him anything else," she says. She crosses her arms over her chest and raises her brow like it's a challenge. She's far too stubborn to back down from this fight.

"Don't you get it?" he asks quietly, shaking his head at her. "You just did the one thing I was worried about. This is why I get weird about you spending time with him. God, Rachel, you just proved me right!"

"Finn, I'm sorry," she repeats. She stands in front of him and he lets her slip her hands into his. "I just want you. I want this to work so badly."

"Kissing other people isn't going to help that," he says pointedly. There are tears in her eyes and he hates himself for it. As pissed off and hurt as he is, he doesn't want to upset her. "I've already had one cheating girlfriend, Rachel. I can't handle another one."

"I know that," she insists. "I know, and that's why I told you. I can't lie to you about it. I don't want...I don't want anything to come between us."

He looks down at her and all she wants is to have him wrap his arms around her and forgive her. She can see that's what he wants too.

"Will you stop spending time with him?" he asks seriously. "I mean it, Rachel. Outside of school and glee."

"Yes," she answers without missing a beat.

(She wants to say no. And there's a voice in her head screaming at her that she shouldn't have to make the choice in the first place.)


	6. Chapter 6

"Hey, man," Puck says as he sees Finn walking towards him. As his friend draws closer, he sees the seriously pissed off look on Finn's face. Shit.

"Look, I know about what happened," Finn says seriously, talking in a low voice so no one around will hear. "She told me. And I know that...you know, she kissed you, not the other way around, but dude, you've gotta stay away from her, okay?"

"Seriously?" Puck asks incredulously. "You're telling me not to hang out with her."

"I asked her not to hang out with you and she agreed. So yeah," Finn says. Puck doesn't know what this feeling in his heart is, but it fucking sucks, whatever it is. "She and I are really trying to make something work here, and I just...we need to..."

"Whatever," Puck says, cutting Finn off. He does _not_ need to hear about it. "Maybe if you treated her a little better, she wouldn't be coming to me all the time with all the fucking shit you put her through." The way he sees it, if Finn's going to be a jackass (seriously? telling Rachel not to hang out with him?) then he's going to at least be honest in return. "All she wants is you to be her fucking boyfriend, and you're too much of an idiot to do it right."

Finn furrows his brow in annoyance and resists the urge to take a step closer (he can't intimidate Puck, and he knows it). "Screw you, man. She's my girlfriend. Or wait, is that the only reason you like her?"

"Fuck," Puck mutters. "I don't need this shit." He knows that he could just tell the truth, that no, that's not why he likes her, that he actually has liked her for a while and he's been resisting temptation just as long. He doesn't think that'd do any good. "You're my boy, and we've been through a lot of fucking stuff together, so this..."

"You've also slept with one girlfriend and kissed the other!" Finn points out.

Okay, so that's true.

Puck takes a breath and looks away as he contemplates what he's about to do, what he's about to say. He doesn't fucking want to. But he thinks that Rachel is well on her way to realizing what a jackass Finn is being to her (why, Puck still doesn't know). So maybe he does need to just sit back and wait, for the good of his friendship.

And besides, it's very clear that Rachel is always going to pick Finn over him anyway. He thinks he's going to have to start letting her.

"Whatever. I'll stay away," Puck says, though he rolls his eyes as he does it. "Would you at least make a little bit of a fucking effort to act like a boyfriend with her? Because you're gonna lose her if you don't."

There's a moment of silence, then Finn looks to the ground and nods his head. "So are we cool?" he asks.

Puck kind of wonders how many times he can fuck up before this friendship won't survive it. He honestly doesn't think they're even close to that point. He also thinks that Finn's had his share of fuck ups too. (Like, say, not trusting him enough to hang out with Rachel.)

Puck just holds up his fist and they smile at one another as their hands bump.

He walks away and really lets it sink in that he's not going to be seeing Rachel much any more.

Well, fuck it. If she agreed to it, then screw her.

He sees her in the hall, and he walks past her before she notices him.

There he goes again, giving her what she wants and getting absolutely fucking nothing in return.

----

Noah is an easy person to avoid. She's had years of practice, after all. She knows where he hangs out between classes and where he goes on break between periods. She knows where he eats lunch and who he talks to in the halls.

And Finn is at her side for most of the day, so she smiles, genuinely smiles, and doesn't really think about Noah that much anyway. (Yes, she does.) Finn carries her books and brings her a nonfat soy latté when he and Matt have to go downtown to the bank during lunch, and she kisses him (and he lets her!) in the hall when he hands it to her. She wonders if he's finally ready to be her boyfriend, the way she wants him to be, or if he's just making it very clear to anyone and everyone who might be looking that she's his girlfriend.

And isn't that what she's wanted all along?

He sits next to her in glee rehearsal, toying with a strand of her hair as they listen to Mr. Schue talk, and she thinks this might be the best day she's had in ages and ages.

(Mostly because Puck's sitting across the room, looking completely disinterested and not even paying her any mind.)

When she gets home, she finishes her homework and has dinner with her fathers, then she goes up to her room to practice for a while, but it's lackluster at best. She simply presses play on her iTunes and sings along with the songs that come on as she checks emails and does a little online shopping.

She actually jumps a little bit when an instant message pops up on her screen. She's in the middle of singing a Mariah song, and the sharp 'ding' that accompanies the message startles her.

Her heart sinks when she sees who it is and what he's said.

**THEPuck**:_ Heard about ur deal with Finn. _

She doesn't know what to say, but another message comes before she can think of what to type.

**THEPuck**:_ U really gonna ignore me?_

**GoldStar**: _Who did you hear that from?_

**THEPuck**: _Who'd ya think? Hang on. Calling u._

She holds her breath as she waits for the phone to ring, and when it does, she picks it up immediately. "Hello, Noah."

"So you made a deal with the devil, huh?"

"Finn is not the devil," she says hotly. "And honestly, can you blame him? After what happened, you can't expect..."

"I can't believe you actually told him. The first rule of cheating is that you _lie_ about it, Berry," he says seriously. "Jesus, have you learned nothing from hanging out with me?"

"Yes, Noah, you're right. Lying about everything was so painless and easy when you did it," she says.

He actually smirks. He likes it when she gets all feisty like this. "I'm just sayin'. You could have had your cake and ate it too, if only you'd kept your mouth shut."

She lets out a huff and flops back on her pillows. "The proper word is _eaten_, in that case, and I don't need your cake," she says, but it's not nearly as convincing as it should be. "And need I remind you that you're the one who so harshly told me to get out of your house."

He scoffs and wonders if she's really as dense as she makes herself seem sometimes. "And you know why that is," he tells her. "Honestly, any longer and you would have had a lot more to fucking confess to your boyfriend."

(There is _not_ a feeling in the pit of her stomach that makes her want to close her eyes and sink further into her mattress. There isn't.)

"Would you really do that to him?" she asks. It's more out of curiosity than anything. She should have known that he wouldn't just answer and leave it at that.

"Would you really have let me have sex with you?" There's silence on the line, and he knows he's taken it too far, but fuck if he cares, because she's dropped him like a bad habit (which maybe he is to her) and he figures he can air their dirty laundry or whatever the fuck that expression is. "C'mon, you know that's what I would have gone for."

"I didn't, actually. Perhaps I should have."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well, it wouldn't be the first time, would it?" she asks. She doesn't do it to hurt him. If he's going to be blunt with her, she's going to respond in kind. She hears the bitter laugh he lets out. "I'm sorry, Noah. That was out of line. But no, I wouldn't have let you take things that far. Eventually, I would have come to my senses."

He laughs again, louder this time. "Berry, you've kissed me twice. _You_ kissed _me_."

"You wanted me to," she says softly. (Oh, god. Didn't he?) "Didn't you?"

"Not the fucking point."

"I think it is."

"You can think whatever you want, sweetheart. It was you throwing yourself against me both times," he says. "Anyway, whatever. It's pretty clear who you want."

"I never denied that it's Finn I want, Noah. Never. You asked me, and I told you the truth."

"Yeah, then you stuck your tongue down my throat, so I got a little confused," he says with a laugh.

She doesn't _say_ a curse, but she _thinks_ it, which is still more than she's ever done before.

She hangs up the phone, because she can't stand listening to him anymore.

Mostly because she honestly had no idea he wanted to _sleep with her_, and it makes her tingly and guilty, and she wonders how just thinking about Noah like that makes her feel so...so...

Okay. Aroused. She'll say it.

But he's a man and she's a woman, and he looks the way he does and talks the way he does (and kisses the way he does), and it's not her fault that her body reacts to all that in the way it does. It doesn't mean anything.

She wonders how many times she'll have to say or think that before she really starts to believe it.

----

After a week and a half of watching she and Finn together, all fucking handsy and kissing and whatever, Puck decides that he needs to rid his system of Rachel Berry. It's not like she's ever gonna want him back, so he should just fucking forget about her now, before anything gets any deeper.

And since fucking when does he have _feelings_?

(And in his heart - _stupid heart_ - he knows that she wants him. She just won't admit it, and she just wants someone else more, and that leaves him with exactly nothing. So what's the point in feeling anything for her at all?)

Matt's hosting their post-basketball game party on Friday night, and Puck decides that he's going to fuck the first (seriously hot) girl who comes onto him, and that'll help cleans his pallet from the girl who wouldn't even let him get to second base, who he's inexplicably still fucking hung up on.

He has a mickey of JD in his truck, and he hands over his keys as soon as he's in the house, because he doesn't plan on driving anywhere. He takes a long swig, straight from the bottle. It's already cold (thank you, Ohio winter) and it hits the spot perfectly.

He walks into the kitchen, high fiving his teammates again after their win, and that's when he sees her. Rachel, standing there next to Finn (their bodies are touching and it seriously pisses Puck off). She's wearing these sexy jeans he recognizes, and a girls' sized jersey with Finn's number on it, and the whole fucking image is _wrong_. He takes another long swig from his bottle, and a few of the guys in the room call his name and clap, because he's a fucking badass, and he loves the way the square bottle feels in his hand.

(He ignores the fact that the only person in the room who doesn't seem impressed is the one girl in the whole world he'd probably do anything for. Another pull off the bottle, and she starts to blur a little.)

He's standing in the kitchen, in plain view of Rachel, when one of the hottest non-Cheerio's in school comes up to him and starts flirting, and he drapes his arm around her shoulder, because she'll do. After a while, he's got no clue what she's saying (does she really think he cares?) and he notices Rachel looking, so he speaks into the girl's (Candice? Courtney? Whatever) ear and asks her if she wants to go somewhere quiet.

He finds himself in an empty bedroom with this smoking hot girl topless and sitting on his lap, and he feels absolutely _nothing_. Sure, his body is reacting, but she's _way_ too skinny, and her voice is too soft, and her hair is too blonde. Her lips aren't full enough and her hands don't feel right running down his chest.

He stands up, setting her down on the bed in one swift motion, and she smiles at him before she realizes what's going on.

He grabs his shirt and pulls it over his head, and he tells her to fuck off when she questions his abilities to satisfy a woman. He honestly doesn't care what she tells anyone.

Rachel watches him pass the kitchen on his way to wherever he's going. She knows that Finn has seen too, but he's concerned enough that he just nods at her, and she kisses him before she walks away, going after the boy she still considers her friend, whether or not he believes that. She thinks Finn lets her go (lets her? she _doesn't_ need his permission) because he knows she can get through to him.

(She reminds herself that a real friend wouldn't have been so quick to cut him out. She hates herself for it every time he avoids her eyes in the hallway.)

She finds him standing with his back against the drivers side door of his truck, and she just stares at him for a second, standing there with his letterman jacket on, eyes closed and head tipped back. For the first time in almost two weeks, she lets herself remember how gorgeous he is.

"I hope you aren't driving anywhere," she says tentatively. His eyes snap open and he looks at her.

"Matt's got my keys."

"Good," she almost whispers as she steps towards him.

He fucking _hates_ her, because she's not wearing a coat, and she's shivering, the idiot, and he can't force himself not to care, so he shrugs off his jacket and practically throws it at her.

"Aren't you breaking the rules?" he asks bitterly.

"Shouldn't you be sleeping with Candice Heatherly?" she asks, her eyebrow raised as she drapes his jacket around her shoulders.

"Jealous?" he spits. He sees her clench her teeth. He thinks she _is_ jealous. Good. "Whatever," he mumbles. "She's disgusting."

"Really? Because you looked pretty interested when she ran her hand over the front of your pants in front of half the basketball team," she says. "Granted, I don't go to a lot of parties, but I'm fairly certain that's a green light."

"Don't act like you fucking care."

"She's not good enough for you," she says softly, looking to the ground, kicking at the snow on the street with the toe of her shoe.

"And you are?" he spits out. He looks at her and he immediately sees how hurt she his.

Well, you know what? Fuck her. She can drop him like he meant nothing to her, so he can talk to her like she's nothing to him. She makes him feel like shit every time she doesn't talk to him. Well, darlin', you get what you give.

"Please don't be angry with me," she says, closing her eyes and shaking her head.

She's standing right there, within reach, literally, and her eyes are closed, and she smells good, and she's wearing his coat, so he moves towards her and kisses her. She lets out a sound of protest and presses her hand against his chest, but he pulls her close and keeps kissing her, because he fucking _wants_ to, and why can't he, just _once_, get what he wants?

"Noah," she breathes out, pushing him away. (Her heart is absolutely _racing_, and it shouldn't be.) "I don't know why you insist on making this so difficult. If anyone saw..."

"Who fucking cares?" he asks. She thinks he's serious. "This is all bullshit. All of it. You and Finn, high school, fucking...fucking glee club. It's all fucking bullshit."

"You're drunk," she reminds him needlessly.

(He's not too drunk to notice that she hasn't told him that she and Finn aren't bullshit.)

"You're a bitch," he replies. He thinks he means it, right now, this second, but he probably won't mean it ever again, and he's probably never meant it before.

"One of these days, Noah, you'll stop trying to hurt me," she says after a moment. When he looks at her, there are tears in her eyes, and he hates her for it. She doesn't get to feel miserable. That's his role in all this. "Maybe you'll start to understand why I'm doing what I'm doing."

She takes off his jacket and shoves it against his stomach. It falls to the ground when he doesn't take it, and she walks away, leaving him standing there alone in the cold.

He thinks he deserves it.

----

When Rachel walks back into the kitchen, she's got her arms around herself, rubbing her hands up and down over the sleeves of her sweater. Finn walks over to her and wraps her up in a hug that warms her up, and she lets him hold her, not caring who sees or who cares.

"You okay?" he asks. "What'd he say to you?"

"I'm fine. He's just drunk," she says. She knows he can't see the tears in her eyes (she's an expert at hiding them) but it makes her wonder how well he knows her.

"Rach, what'd he say?" Maybe he can't read her perfectly all the time, but he knows Puck well enough to know that he gets extra douchey when he's drinking whiskey.

"Nothing. Honest." She smiles and hops up on her toes to kiss him. "Just let him be miserable on his own."

Finn runs his hands down her back, and she closes her eyes to keep herself from tearing up again.

She doesn't want Noah to be miserable.

She knows it's all her fault.

----

The day after the party, Finn is laying on her bed in his sweats and a McKinley Basketball tee shirt. He spent the night for the first time the night before, sleeping in the guest room, of course, and since they woke up and had breakfast, they've been lounging in her bedroom. He's leafing through a book she recommended he read for a book report, and she's at her computer, checking her email.

She thinks he looks really sweet on her bed like that. It's not made yet, since she hasn't gotten around to it, and he's got his legs tucked beneath the covers. He's been on her bed plenty of times, but he's never been _in_ it. She watches him, her eyes gravitating towards him every so often, and she thinks it's really cute, the way he looks all confused as he reads. He's already asked her a couple questions, which she's answered easily. He's got a cup of coffee sitting on the bedside table, and her mug of tea is steaming next to her.

It's so _normal_, just sitting here with him in the quiet. She likes it. It's _nice_.

She's typing out an email reply to a cousin who lives in Sacramento when she gets an IM.

**THEPuck: **_I was a dick last night. _

She actually laughs, and she looks up and Finn hasn't heard her. He's all wrapped up in the book and she smiles and shakes her head. She turns back to her computer and types out a reply.

**GoldStar:**_ Is that your version of an apology?_

**THEPuck:**_ No, but I'm sorry. Ur not a bitch._

**GoldStar:** _Are you sure? You seemed fairly certain of it last night. _

**THEPuck:** _I fucked up. Sorry._

**GoldStar:** _I forgive you. Are you okay?_

The response is delayed and it worries her. It's silly, really, since he could just be multitasking or something, but she can just picture him in his room, staring at the computer screen and trying to come up with an answer. She doesn't want him to give her some ridiculous response.

**GoldStar:** _You can tell me the truth, you know. _

**THEPuck:** _The truth? U can't handle the truth. _

**GoldStar:** _Ha ha. You're no Jack Nicholson_

**THEPuck:** _We're both badasses. _

She laughs, and Finn looks up at her, but he's smiling and he tells her that her laugh is cute. She doesn't even blush, just smiles back at him and shakes her head.

(She wonders why she doesn't blush over his compliments anymore.)

**GoldStar:** _Truth? I have to go soon. _

**THEPuck: **_Truth?_

**GoldStar: **_Please. _

She bites her thumbnail as she waits for his response. She doesn't really know what he's going to say to her, but she doesn't think it's ever been this difficult to get an honest answer from him. He's always honest (mostly) and almost to a fault. He's blunt and crass, but at least she usually knows where she stands with him.

**THEPuck: **_Truth is..._

There are butterflies in her stomach as she waits for the rest of it.

**THEPuck: **_I miss you._

He's signed off before she can type back that she misses him too.

And she's blushing.

----

He honestly doesn't know why he told her that. It's true, fine, but she doesn't need to _know_ it.

But he's really fucking tired of her ignoring him (he hadn't realized how much he likes having her around him until she wasn't there anymore). He thinks that this stepping aside so she can be happy with Finn stuff is kind of fucking ridiculous.

He's pretty sure Finn isn't right for her. He's pretty sure Finn is totally wrong for her, actually. It makes his head hurt to think of her kissing the guy. And like, what the hell do they talk about when they're together? What do they have in common? Does she ever look at Finn the way she looked at _him_ right before she kissed him?

He's going out of his _fucking_ mind.

This girl's got his head and...and maybe his heart...all in the palm of her hand, and he can't do shit about it. He can't even be with another girl because he knows how wrong it feels. Or maybe how right Rachel feels. The only time the night before that he didn't feel absolutely numb was when he kissed her. That has to mean something.

And dammit, it has to mean something to _her_. Doesn't it? He can't feel this much for her and have her feel nothing for him.

What he needs is to break up she and Finn. Or get over her.

He's starting to think the latter just won't be happening.

And he _does_ miss her. All the fucking time.

----

She calls him one night, when she's sitting at home alone. She doesn't know why she dials his number. She doesn't. It's been a few days since his confession of whatever it was he confessed (she's replayed it in her head a few times, trying to think if there's a bigger, deeper meaning, or if he just misses talking to her.)

He asks her why she's calling, and she gives him some excuse about choreography for glee that even _she_ doesn't buy. But he just laughs and goes along with it, lets her give him tips about making his spins more fluid, and then she eventually asks how he is, and he tells her he's fine, but that math (since she started forcing him to go) is kicking his ass, and when she offers to help, he actually lets her.

And so the phone calls begin. He doesn't know if she's doing it just to fuck with him, but he's pretty sure she isn't. They talk for a few minutes at a time, and he wonders, constantly, what Finn would say if he knew. He teases her, tells her to delete her call history so no one finds her out, and the way she laughs makes him wonder if she was already doing that all on her own. (She? She _is_ learning from him.)

"Rachel, what is this?" he asks after a week of them 'chatting' every night.

It always startles her just a little bit when he calls her by her first name. She knows he's being serious, and it males her body tense. "A conversation, Noah. I know your vocabulary isn't as extensive as mine, but I assumed you understood the concept."

"Funny," he mumbles. He can practically picture her smiling smugly to herself. "I mean, what does your boyfriend think?"

"He doesn't know."

"Exactly. Berry, you're not exactly the kinda girl that hides things from her boyfriend." (He resists the urge to add_ 'as we're already learned'_ because he knows she'll get pissed at the mention of the kissing.)

"Well, maybe if my boyfriend wasn't just a little bit unreasonable when it comes to my relationship with another boy, I'd be more eager to please him," she says. She cringes immediately, knowing that a sexual comment is coming her way.

"And just how _eager_ is that?" he asks roguishly.

"Noah, he's asked me to do something that I don't agree with. And while I suppose I can understand his concerns, I think it's ridiculous. This whole thing," she says sternly.

"So why don't you tell _him_ that?" he asks.

It's not like he wants her to end this or whatever, but why doesn't Finn trust her enough to let her do her own thing? Puck honestly never thought Rachel was the type to follow orders. He ignores the voice in his head telling him that she loves that other guy or something, and she'll do anything for him. He doesn't even know if that's true.

That shit isn't healthy. She shouldn't have to make sacrifices. Even he knows that. He wonders why she doesn't.

"He wouldn't understand," she admits quietly, sadly.

"Pretty fucked up your own guy can't understand you, don't you think?" he asks.

His mother walks into the room to let him know dinner's ready and sees him talking on the phone, and she rolls her eyes, because she knows who he's talking to. He hasn't made it a secret that he's been keeping in touch with Rachel. Any time his mom asks, he tells her what's going on, that Rachel's a friend and Finn's girlfriend. His mom doesn't agree with his talking to her. He doesn't give a fuck.

"I'm hanging up now," Rachel states.

"Later, babe," he says, because he knows that even when he pisses her off, she'll still answer if he calls her. And she'll still call him if she wants to.

He saunters into the kitchen and sits down at the table, and it's quiet, because he knows the second he opens his mouth, his mom's gonna be on his ass about this whole Rachel thing. Honestly, he doesn't get why she thinks it's any of her business. She's never really cared about the chicks he's dated before, but now she's all on edge because Quinn's knocked up. And okay, so maybe she has a reason to be a little concerned, but he could have used that, oh, _eight months ago_. He's showing, he thinks, a pretty impressive amount of self-restraint because he knows, he _knows_, that if he just grabbed Rachel and kissed her (again), she wouldn't stop him.

Apparently his mom doesn't enjoy the silence as much as he does.

"I don't like this Rachel girl."

He glares at her over his plate as he pushes around his green beans. "She's a Jew with an amazing voice, a heart of gold, and more ambition than you'll ever see out of me. The hell, you don't like her."

She smiles, and he shakes his head. They both know that under different circumstances, she'd be picking out fucking china patterns. "She upsets you," she argues.

He shrugs his shoulder. He's used to that part by now. "Not that easy, mom."

She smiles at him over the table, and he knows she'd reach for his hand if she could. "Noah, you've got a good heart too. It's just too bad she can't see it."

He doesn't say it, doesn't really want to get into it with her, but he's pretty sure Rachel _does_ see it. That's the whole fucking problem.

"Whatever," he mumbles.

"And I think you might better stay away from Finn's girlfriends. I don't need any more grandchildren, thank you very much," she says.

He drops his fork on his plate and pushes his chair back. She's always making comments like that, and it makes him feel like shit. He hates it, mostly because he knows he fucked up and he doesn't need a reminder.

He heads to his room and changes into a hoodie and some sweats, and he goes out for a run, because he thinks that it might help work out some of the tension that's coursing through his veins.

Fuck, he needs to get laid. He really hates all this emotional involvement shit, because there's only one girl he wants to sleep with, and she's totally, completely off limits.

His phone, which doubles as an mp3 player, buzzes, and he takes it out of his pocket. He's got a message from Rachel, and it's a song she says she thinks he'll appreciate.

It's that Ne-Yo guy she likes, and the song is called Crazy. He can tell it's the title and not the lyrics that she was saying he'd like.

She _is_ fucking crazy.

And he _wants_ her.

----

"Finn," she says one day as they're walking to his car after school, "you trust me, right?"

He looks at her like she's nuts. "Of course, I trust you."

"Really?"

"Yeah," he says seriously. "Why?"

"If you trust me, then why do you have such a problem with me spending time with Noah?" she asks.

It's like beating a dead horse. She knows the answer, knows what he's going to say, but at the end of the day, if he trusts her, then it shouldn't be a problem. And maybe Noah is right. Maybe it is strange that Finn doesn't understand. Maybe it is time she stood up for herself.

(The thought of losing him isn't nearly as devastating as it used to be. She chalks it up to her own self-confidence. She's not sure if she's right.)

"I don't trust _him_," he says, just like she expected he would. "Not with you."

"But if you trust _me_..."

"Why is this such a big deal? Is spending time with him really that important to you?" he asks stopping in his tracks.

_Can't back down now_, she thinks.

"Yes," she says firmly. She can't read the look on his face. "Noah is my _friend_, and I don't have a lot of those. I honestly don't think you or anyone else should be able to tell me I can't spend time with him if that's what I choose to do."

(For a split second, she can almost picture Noah, standing there with that smirk on his face, arms crossed, impressed with her courage.)

"I don't know what to say to that," he says after a moment of silence. He's looking at her with this weird expression, and she raises her brow, as if she's trying to challenge him to tell her what to do. They both know it'd be no use. She's just made that clear. "You know how I feel about it."

"And now you know how I feel," she says.

They just stare at one another in the parking lot as students mill around, getting into their cars and leaving for the day. She's going to give him 15 seconds to admit that he's wrong, and then she's leaving. 15 seconds, because she's given him weeks of indulging in this stupid insecurity he has (maybe it's not exactly stupid, since she did kiss Noah, but that's not the point right now). She's given him that, and she thinks he should give her something in return, and not just holding her hand in public or kissing her between classes. She thinks that might all just be some sort of weird possessive behaviour anyway, a reminder to Noah and the rest of the boys at their school that she's with him.

15 seconds, because she thinks that maybe that's all he deserves.

_3...2...1_

She turns on her heel, hair flipping over her shoulder, and starts walking away.

"Rachel!" Finn comes up behind her, and she likes that he at least knows better than to touch her when she's upset. "Where're you going? I'm driving you home."

"I'll take the bus."

"Don't be crazy. C'mon."

"I am _not_ crazy!" she hisses at him, trying not to make a scene. There are already students looking at them, wondering what they're talking about so intensely. Finn is standing right in front of her, hands in his pockets as he looks down at her.

(There's only one person who calls her crazy, and he says it with fondness, not judgment. And it's kind of their thing, and she wants it to stay that way.)

"I didn't mean it like that," Finn says, softening his tone. "You know I didn't."

"I don't like it when you say that," she admits quietly.

"I'm sorry," he says. It doesn't really mean much to her. He's not apologizing for everything, just this one little thing.

It's not enough.

"I'll see you tomorrow," she says, turning away from him again.

"Rach, it's freezing out. Just get in the car!"

She keeps walking.

He lets her go.

There are tears in her eyes when she realizes that is exactly what she wanted him to do.

----

It seems her stupid talk with Finn went on just a little too long, because the bus she needs has already left, and none of her 'friends' (ie: fellow glee-clubbers) are around. She tried Kurt, but he's racing home for an afternoon of answering phones at his dad's garage (a visual she can't quite wrap her head around; she just pictures a sequined set of coveralls and it's all downhill from there).

And she tried Kurt first because she knows that she's going to get an I told you so from Noah if she calls him. He'll see her tears, and she can't lie to him, and she'll have to tell the whole stupid story.

But it's too cold and too far to walk, so she scrolls through her Blackberry and hits send and waits for him to pick up.

"Berry."

"Noah, hello. It seems I've been left at the school without a ride. Would it be possible, I mean if it's not too much trouble, for you..."

"He fucking left you there?" he asks angrily.

"Yes. No. It's complicated," she says, her words becoming muddled. "Yes, he did, but I told him to."

"Give me 5," he says.

She sits on the curb in front of the school with her legs pulled up and her arms clasped at the back of her thighs to keep her skirt in place, and she finds herself smiling when she sees his truck round the corner. He reaches over to push the door open as she stands, and when she climbs in, she can tell he's looking at the tears on her cheeks, not her legs. She almost misses the way he leers at her sometimes.

"Rachel..."

"Just drive."

He thinks he should press her for the whole story. Actually, he knows he _shouldn't_, he just wants to. He wants to know what the fuck just happened between she and Finn, why she was sitting in the cold and waiting for him instead of in the warmth of Finn's car.

Most importantly, he wants to know if she and Finn have broken up. Maybe that makes him a complete dick, but he doesn't care anymore when she reaches over and turns up the radio, and he watches her mouth the words to the song coming through the speakers.

He doesn't know where he's going, where she wants him to take her, but when he drives past the city limits sign, she smiles at him and he thinks it doesn't matter.


	7. Chapter 7

"You know what I think?" she asks, turning towards him as he drives. "I think boys, all of you, are idiots."

"Harsh, Berry," he says with a laugh.

"I'm being completely serious. You're all idiots. It might be in different ways, and some are bigger idiots than others, but you're all idiots."

"Well..."

"No arguing!" she says. She turns back to the road, flopping back against the seat. He stares at her for a second before paying attention to the straightaway they're on. "I can't believe I said all that to him."

"Well, it's the truth, right? It's how you feel," he says. He thinks he might just be doing it to confirm what he wants to hear. She wants to spend time with him, and she doesn't care what Finn says.

(Fuckin' right!)

"Yes, it is. And as much as I can't believe I did that, there's a part of me that thinks it was long overdue, actually," she says seriously.

She's got a bottle of water between her knees, a bag of salt and vinegar chips on her lap (she never eats chips, apparently, but she wanted them, so he bought the bag and tossed them at her). She's pulled her hair up at some point, and her shoes are sitting on the floorboard in front of her. She looks good, he decides, riding shotgun in his truck. She looks like she belongs there. (Maybe that part's just in his head.)

"I didn't think Finn would be like this," she admits. Her voice is quiet and he looks at her again. She's got her eyes fixed on her lap, and he turns down the radio a little bit more.

"Like what?"

She shifts towards him again, tucks one leg beneath the other, and he doesn't apologize when his gaze drifts to her thighs (okay, he's totally trying to see if he can peek up her skirt; he can't). "I think I...I idealized him. I thought he could do no wrong. Which is why it comes as as a surprise that he's....he's..."

"An idiot?" Puck supplies.

"Yes!" she cries. She's wearing this big smile, and she shoves at his arm as they both laugh.

He's been awfully quiet, and she's done all the talking. She told him the whole thing, the whole story, every word of what she said to Finn, and her rationale behind waiting 15 seconds before she stormed off. He laughed at that part, and she had to smile. He hasn't given his opinion or anything. He's paid attention to her, she thinks, but he hasn't said much. She wonders if it's because he knows where he stands, how he feels, and that he thinks she knows it too.

"Oh! Pull over!" she says seriously, swatting his arm a few times.

"We're in the middle of fucking nowhere, Berry," he reminds her. She's already called her dads to say she wasn't coming home for dinner (the Wendy's drive thru worked, since she could at least order a salad from there, which Puck rolled his eyes at, because it wouldn't kill the girl to eat a fucking burger). They told her to be safe and call if she was going to be late. That's it. "I don't think daddy and...daddy would like this."

"I don't care. Pull over," she repeats. (She doesn't say it, but she's thinking that he'll protect her anyway, so there's nothing to worry about.)

He kinda digs this rebellious side to her, so he smiles as he pulls over to the side of the road. There're no lights around, no cars, no street lamps, no houses. They're literally in the _middle of fucking nowhere_. He wasn't lying.

He's about to ask her what the hell she's up to, but she jumps out of the truck, grabbing her jacket and pulling it over her arms again (she took it off after they'd been driving for about 20 minutes).

"What are we doing, crazy girl?" he asks as he steps out of the truck. There's snow everywhere, and she's standing in front of the headlights. She's the only thing he can see, and she's staring at him.

She's staring at him because he just called her the same thing Finn did earlier, and this time her heart swells instead of falling. She smiles and tells him to come closer, and when he does, she tells him to look up.

"Alright. What am I looking at?" he asks.

She leans up, her hand on his shoulder, and her warm breath hitting his cold cheek. "Stars," she says simply.

He laughs and throws his arm lazily around her shoulder as they both look up at the constellations that neither of them can name. He loves the way she feels, warm against his side, her arm around his waist. He loves the smell of her shampoo, the way her hair falls over his arm though he can't feel it through his coat. The smile on her face is beautiful, and her eyes sparking are almost more fun to watch than the stars.

But he doesn't know what any of this means. What's going to happen with her and Finn, and what all of this means for him.

"Noah?" He looks down at her and she's looking up at him. "May I say something that I'm sure you'll hate?"

He laughs a little and pulls away, turns so he's facing her. "Why would you do that?" he asks.

"Because I want to," she says, and it's like it's the most simple, obvious answer she could give. He can't argue it. So he nods his head, and he's surprised when she slips her hand into his. "I think you'd be a _really_ good boyfriend."

He hates that he can feel his pulse change, and that he loves the way her thumb is moving against his.

She's the _queen_ of the mind fuck.

And he remembers what his mom said, and what he said in response. No, it's _not_ that easy. He doesn't appreciate Rachel making it sound like it's all fucking simple.

He pulls himself away from her and runs his hand over his head. (He's just realizing now how cold it is. Maybe because she's not keeping him warm anymore. He wonders how she can stand there in that little skirt, and he worries, for a second, that she's cold. Then he remembers that he's pissed, and he turns his back on her.)

"Noah." She doesn't know what she did to upset him so abruptly.

"This isn't fair," he says angrily, facing her again. "It's not fair to me, or to him."

"I'm not..."

"You can't just come to me every time he pisses you off! It doesn't work like that."

"It's not like that!" she shouts back. "Noah, I'm...I'm sorry." He scoffs and she places her hand on his arm, but he pulls away. "It's just that with him, everything's so...confusing, and frustrating, and I never know what's happening. And then there's you." She looks into his eyes, so soft and green right now, even in the darkness, and she wonders if he's ever looked at anyone else this way. "And everything with us is so easy, and I don't have to question anything, and..."

"So you fuck with me because I let you?"

"No!" she's quick to insist. "No, that's not what I mean. I mean...it's just...natural."

He shakes his head and looks to the ground. "Rachel..."

"I'm sorry. I just don't know which of those is supposed to be better, you know?" She blinks to keep the tears at bay, and he wants to reach out for her, but he can't let himself.

"I hope you figure it out," he says coldly.

"I'm _trying_," she says. A tear falls down her cheek, and she looks away from him to try and hide it. She doesn't even realize he's standing in front of her until his hand is hot on her cheek. "I'm not trying to..." She stops talking, because she realizes she's about to accuse him of having feelings for her, when he's never admitted that, not really.

"What?" he asks quietly. She's surprised he says anything.

"Am I leading you on?" she almost whispers.

He actually laughs. "Trust me, Rachel, if I knew how to get the fuck away from you, I would." She finds herself smiling as another tear trails down her cheek. "This fucking sucks for me, but I know you're not doing it on purpose."

"You do?" She looks up at him, eyes all hopeful, and he doesn't know when his hands made their way to her hips, but that's where they're sitting. She doesn't seem to mind.

"I'm not a total idiot," he says. She laughs again and moves closer, wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her head on his chest. "I just want you to wake up and see that he's _not right_ for you, Rachel."

She can't look at him as he says it, but she asks anyway. "Are you saying you're right for me?"

"I dunno," he admits, though it fucking hurts him to do it. He wants to just say yes, but he can't mislead her. As much as he wants her, he can't say with authority that he's right for her. He thinks he's better than Finn, either way. "It'd be nice to have a freaking chance," he mumbles. She laughs against his chest. He doesn't know why. He's being completely serious. "Not joking."

"No," she says, pulling away. "I know. And thank you for telling me."

She doesn't say it, but he thinks she's thanking him because his little confession (and he'd panic more about it if it wasn't all the truth) might help her with whatever decision she's about to make. At least he hopes so. If she's just being polite, he's gonna be pissed.

She wipes the tears from her cheeks, and he hears the music coming from inside his truck. They're standing there on the side of the road in the dark, where they've stopped so she could look at the stars (or maybe just make him look at the stars). He's just told her things that he never thought he would (and in a nicer way than he ever thought he would if he had).

"Rachel," he says softly. When she looks up at him, there's something in her eyes that he's seen before, and only when she was about to kiss him. (Green light.) "I'm gonna kiss you."

"Noah."

"Shut up and let me."

His lips are on hers and she melts against him, grabbing onto the front of his jacket as he wraps his arms around her waist. She kisses him back with just as much as he's giving her, and he makes it his fucking _goal_ to make her weak in the knees. He doesn't care that Finn's his best friend and this is all familiar and Rachel is confused and fucked up and this probably isn't helping. He hasn't been alone with her in weeks, and he's been thinking about _her_, and this, and her hands on him, and he's not going to stop until she makes him.

He runs his tongue along her bottom lip, and she moans as she lets him deepen the kiss. She's right up on her toes so she can be as close to him as possible, and she knows this is a bad idea, that it's wrong, but she doesn't care because it feels _good_, and it feels _right_, and _oh_, there's that thing he does with his tongue, and she tries to pull away because she knows she's going to get swept away by him.

When they part, he's smirking at her and he shakes his head, like he's not going to let her get away with ending things, and she isn't surprised at all when he kisses her again. He presses her against the side of his truck and she squeaks when her thighs come in contact with the freezing metal.

"Sorry," he murmurs against her lips. She tugs his bottom lip just a little bit with her teeth, and he lets out a noise from the back of his throat. "Bitch."

She giggles. He doesn't know how she remembers how much he loves when she teases him like that. _Fuck_, he needs to stop this. If he doesn't...well, then he _won't_.

"Noah, stop," she says breathlessly. She's still pressed up against him, her hands still on him, and he knows she doesn't want to stop, but she knows she should. It's like she can read his mind sometimes, and it freaks him the hell out. "Sorry, but..."

"'S'okay." He kisses her just once, gently. "I know I'm not making this easy for you."

"Not really," she admits, and they both laugh. (But she thinks everything's easier when it's just the two of them alone together. And that might mean a lot more than anyone would assume.) "Can you take me home now?"

He absolutely can't help it. He can't just let that one slide.

"Your place or mine?" he asks, his voice low. It sends a shiver down her spine and it absolutely shouldn't. She blushes (really? after kissing him like that, _this_ makes her blush?) and buries her face against his chest. "You set me up for that."

He lets her go, doesn't kiss her forehead the way he wants to, and watches her run around to the other side of the truck. He takes a deep breath before getting in, because they've got an hour drive back to town, and he honestly doesn't know what she's going to say to him, or what he should say to her. Maybe nothing. Maybe they're done talking.

(Is she _ever_ done talking?)

The top 40 radio station she's forcing him to listen to starts playing a song, and she turns it up so loud that it makes him look at her worriedly. He's not surprised at all when she starts singing along. Loudly. And really fucking well, too.

She takes his hand midway through the first verse. He lets her, and he finds himself smiling as she sings.

_One word turns into a war. Why is it the smallest things that tear us down?_

He thinks this is some kind of emotional release for her, and he's not going to make fun of her for it, because a, she sounds amazing, and b, she's holding his hand and singing about a shitty relationship, so he's pretty sure she's not talking about the two of them. As much as he wants her to just tell him that she's going to dump Finn, he knows they've already done a lot more talking and stuff than they should have.

And he should probably care more about his best friend. He should be worried about this all getting back to Finn and losing him again. But it's totally different this time.

This time, he's pretty sure that getting the girl is worth losing his friend over, if it were to come to that.

----

She's got her shoes and jacket back on by the time they pull up to her house. She's toying with the strap of her backpack as his truck idles in the driveway, and he steals glances at her, waiting for her to say something or do something or notice him looking.

When she does, she smiles and her cheeks flush pink.

"Noah, in case there was any doubt, in case I didn't make it clear before, I really like kissing you," she says.

He tips his head back and closes his eyes. _Fuck_. "Killin' me, Rach."

"Yeah? How do you think I feel?" It's kind of mumbled, and she's looking to her lap. She only looks at him when he starts laughing. Loudly. "What?" she snaps.

"We are fucked up," he says firmly. She's trying not to smile when their eyes meet. "Seriously. _Fucked_."

"That's not exactly the word I'd use to describe us," she argues.

He turns towards her, resting his elbow on the steering wheel as he leans closer to her. "One of these days," he starts. He gets totally distracted when she glances at his lips. "One of these days, I'm gonna make you say it."

"What?" she breathes out. God, it's like she can't even control herself around him.

He leans in closer (oh, he _so_ has her) and he hears her sharp intake of breath. "Fuck," he whispers.

Her jaw drops and he laughs when she shoves him away from her. "_Goodbye_, Noah."

"Later, babe."

She glares at him as she hops out of his truck, and he catches her smiling when he shoots her a wink.

----

When she sees Finn the next morning, he's standing at her locker waiting for her.

And it now strikes her as really odd that he didn't once try to call her the night before.

"Hey," he says quietly when she approaches and starts fiddling with her lock. "Are you still mad at me?"

"Well," she says, glancing at him from the corner of her eye, "did I miss your apology? Or have you just not given me one?" He stutters a little, but doesn't really say anything. "I have to talk to Mr. Schuester before class."

She grabs her books and tries to leave, but he catches her wrist. "Rach. C'mon, we should talk."

"We will. Later. When I have time," she says seriously. She pulls her arm away from him and the flash of hurt on his face doesn't bother her as much as she knows it should.

She walks away, head held high, and she thinks she loves this confident side of herself. She's halfway down the hall when she realizes that this is _her_, and somewhere along the way, she lost sight of that. She's always been blunt, confident to a fault in the face of adversity, the kind of girl who would do anything to get what she wanted. And she's still this girl. It feels _good_ to be this girl.

She honestly doesn't know if Finn can handle this girl.

Then she sees Noah walking towards her, talking to Mike and Matt as he saunters down the hall. She doesn't say anything to him and he doesn't say anything to her, but he smiles at her when he sees her, shoulders back, shin in the air, clearly on a mission.

She thinks Noah can handle her.

She wants him to.

(She blushes when before she steps into Mr. Schue's office, because she's thinking of all the many ways Noah could handle her, and she can practically picture the look on his face if she ever told him that she thought about him like this.)

----

"Hold it right there!"

She stops in her tracks and closes her eyes, because she just wants to get to her locker, grab her lunch, and find a quiet place to eat where she doesn't have to deal with..._This_.

Kurt, standing in front of her now, hand on his hip and perfectly shaped eyebrow arched at her. "Spill, Babs."

"I don't know what you're talking about," she says seriously, setting her shoulders and trying to move around him. He steps in front of her again and she knows she's trapped.

"Finn's walking around like a hopeless, lost little puppy, and you two haven't been breaking my heart by being the perfect couple you've been for weeks."

She rolls her eyes and then glares at him. "I know I'm not one to talk, but don't you think you're being just the slightest bit dramatic?"

"Rachel, come on," he pleads. "I need _details_."

She honestly doesn't know what to say. Kurt's not an idiot and she knows that everyone probably knows there's a rift between she and Finn right now. She should really just find him and talk to him, put him out of his misery, so to speak, but she doesn't know how to break up with someone. She's only ever broken up with one person (and no, the irony of the whole situation isn't lost on her) and this is much, much different. The relationship has lasted more than five days and there are (were?) actual emotions involved.

"Kurt, I..."

"Berry," she hears from behind them. Kurt rolls his eyes and sighs in frustration. "'Sup, Hummel."

"I know I was on the football team for weeks, but I still don't appreciate the use of my last name as a form of address. It's Kurt." Puck's just grinning at him, and Rachel is trying not to laugh. "_Kurt_," he repeats slowly, as if Puck needs help with the pronunciation.

"Whatever, Hummel." He turns to Rachel when Kurt stomps his foot. "Got a minute? Need your help with this shit."

He holds up his math text and Rachel smiles at him. He's saving her again. "Sorry Kurt. I have to go. See you in glee!"

"Rachel Berry!" Kurt shouts, but she's already got her back to him, walking down the hall with Puck beside her.

"Saved your ass," Puck mumbles.

"How did you know I needed it?" she asks as they round the corner, heading for the library.

"You were talking to Kurt," he says, like that in and of itself is something everyone needs rescuing from.

They walk in silence and he shoves open the library door so she can walk through (yeah, he doesn't hold doors, but he's not a complete cad.) She finds it a little weird that he's actually in the library, and she wonders if he really does need help, or if he just wanted to get her someplace quiet so he could ask her what she's doing about Finn.

She decides she'll be preemptive.

As soon as they're seated in a quiet corner, far away from everyone else, he actually opens his book and grabs his pencil from behind his ear.

"I don't want to do it at school," she says quietly, leaning across the table.

His lips break into a smirk and he leans forward too. "Do _what_, exactly?"

"Don't be crass," she says.

"Then don't tempt me."

She rolls her eyes and he laughs, because how he acts, she obviously has no control over. "Break up with him. I don't want to break up with him at school."

He stares at her for a second, because _holy shit_, is she serious? Is she really going to do it? Is he going to get the girl for once? This girl, this amazing girl who's _so_ underrated. She's like a scrappy little underdog (and he means that in a nice way, not a jerky way). He thinks that's what he is, too, except maybe he's like, a scrappy _pit bull_ or something. An _awesome_ underdog. Like a pit bull with one eye. _Yeah_. Badass.

"Noah?" she says slowly.

"What?" His reply is quick, because he was totally thinking of what kind of dog she would be to compliment his fucking sweet ass pit bull. But he knows girls well enough not to say any of that, or she'd be dumping him too. (Do not [seriously, like, _ever_] refer to a girl as a dog. _Ever_.)

"Your reaction is troublesome," she admits. She toys with her pink mechanical pencil, and he settles his foot up against hers beneath the table, because it's a way he can touch her without it being a big scene. (He wouldn't be surprised if Hummel was laying in wait in the stacks, eavesdropping and trying to get info.)

"No. No, I was just...thinking. About stuff. About you. And me, kinda. But yeah, mostly you," he says. She's smiling at him in that way she does when she thinks he's being cute (what? he's noticed that smile.) "You're really giving him the boot?"

She cringes and covers her face with her hands. "Please don't put it like that. I don't even know how to go about this. How am I supposed to break up with someone?"

He glares at her across the table. "Well, ya didn't have any problem when you dumped my sorry ass."

She actually laughs. "That was different." But even as she says it, she's not sure it's really true. She's been thinking about it all day, how that one went, how she felt about him, and she realizes that the emotions were there. She cared about him, but her vision was blurred by someone else. It all sounds kind of familiar. "He's going to be so hurt."

He nods in understanding. "Yeah. Just don't throw his credit score in his face."

She giggles, covering her mouth immediately. "I heard about that. Should I be worried?" she asks all coy, eyes half open, looking at him sideways.

(Dammit, he loves it when she finds her sense of humour. Totally hot.)

And he really loves that she's basically just said that they're going to be together. Not that he really doubted it, not after last night, but still. It's nice to hear.

He could make a comment about her being a superficial girl, or _not_ being a superficial girl, actually, but he doesn't, because there's something inside his head, a voice screaming _'Don't fuck this up, you idiot!' _ He just smiles at her and watches as she clicks her pencil. He wonders what else those little hands could do.

(_Not_ the time to be thinking of that.)

"But really, I'm shit with numbers," he says, tapping his pencil on the book in front of him. "Help a guy out?"

She laughs and moves around the table to sit next to him.

He thinks it's the only time he's ever willingly been in the library.

It's not so bad.

----

When Rachel gets to glee rehearsal, she sits next to Finn, and she smiles and asks him how his day has been (_"terrible,"_ he says, and she believes him). She pretends that she can't tell that Noah is watching her every move and trying to eavesdrop. They run through their numbers, and she gives it her all, because she needs to get lost in the music, lost in something other than what she's about to do to the boy whose eyes are pleading with her as she sings. She doesn't want to hurt Finn. She's almost counting the minutes.

She avoids Noah as she gathers her things, because she doesn't need to watch him watching her leave with Finn, even if he knows what's coming next. She thinks he'll call her later anyway.

(It should not be this easy to smile when she's about to break up with her boyfriend.)

Finn carries her bag for her as they walk in silence to his car. She doesn't know what to say, and she's almost certain that he knows what's coming and just doesn't want to start the conversation. She tries to smile as he holds the car door open for her, but he's looking to the ground, and her heart falls, because this is going to be harder than she thought.

Because it's not that she doesn't like him. She does. Obviously. She wants to want him. There's a part of her that still, even right now, wishes that he was the boy that her heart was still set on. Wouldn't it just be so much easier if the boy you were with was the one who was right for you? She knows it's stupid and naive and impossible, but it would certainly make things better for her. She wouldn't feel so terrible, and he wouldn't look so sad, and Noah wouldn't have been sitting back and waiting.

(Noah has been sitting back and _waiting_.)

They make stupid small talk in the car, like how Artie hit an amazing note in rehearsal, or Tina's harmonies with Kurt during the bridge of one song. And it's stupid and pointless and Rachel hates it, and she thinks Finn hates it too.

He pulls into her driveway and puts the car in park, but doesn't cut the engine. She turns to look at him in confusion. He always comes inside. She needs him to today.

"This is over, isn't it?" he asks quietly, avoiding her eyes.

She sighs and dread washes over her. She doesn't know what to say. "I'm sorry."

(That sounds right, but doesn't feel like it means much of anything.)

"Me too," he says, and she thinks he means it in a few ways. "I think we both wanted this to work out, but...it's just...not."

"Yeah," she whispers. She's not entirely sure why the tears are in her eyes. "I don't know why."

Finn laughs softly and finally looks over at her. "Because I have trust issues and you have feelings for someone else," he says, like it's the simplest thing in the world.

"Finn."

"I thought if I asked you to stay away from him, it'd just go away. But it doesn't work like that, does it?" he asks. She bites her lip and shakes her head. "I really, really wanted this to work. You're amazing, Rachel."

She lets out a humourless laugh and shakes her head again. "I don't feel amazing."

He doesn't really know what to say to that. "I'm sorry," he says, because he figures he owes her an apology or 100. "For a bunch of stuff."

"Can we still be friends?" she asks quietly as she wipes her eyes. He sends her this soft little smile that, a few months ago, would have made her knees week.

"Of course."

He leans across the car to hug her, and they exchange kisses to the cheek, and she honestly wonders how that went so well. And she wonders why she's still crying, because this is what she wants. She's not second guessing that at all. She supposes she's just upset that Finn could see everything she's been trying so hard to hide, and he was suffering because of it, and she was too wrapped up in her own stuff to really understand.

(She promises herself she'll be a better girlfriend to her next boyfriend.)

They say their goodbyes (it works on a few levels) and she steps out of his car, and like always, he waits until she's inside the house before driving away. She thinks maybe they'll be one of those rare couples that actually _can_ remain friends after they break up. After all, they were friends first. Maybe they can just go back to that.

She's laying on her back on her bed, listening to some Celine (so soothing, and she needs her idol right now) when her phone chirps at her. She leaves it for a few minutes, because she's not ready for contact from the outside world just yet. When it beeps again, telling her she's got another text, she lifts herself off her bed and grabs her Blackberry from her desk.

_Call me when deed is done. _

It's from Noah, and she actually laughs. She laughs even harder when she reads the second one.

_Deed = break up. Not sex. _

She knows it's a joke. She loves that he's trying to lighten the mood.

She sinks back into her mattress, turns her music down, and dials his number.

She hears him answer and a smile spreads across her face.

"Hi," she says softly.

She thinks this is what it's like to be really happy. Or at least on the way to it.


	8. Chapter 8

She wishes there was some handbook or manual to help her get through the day at school.

And even though Noah told her not to, she totally Googled 'how to act after a breakup', which gave her a few tips, actually (not that she can gloat to him, or he'll never let her live it down). She's just worried about the gossip. She knows her school and she knows that news travels like wildfire. She's sure everyone already knows about she and Finn already. She's thankful that it's Friday, so she only has to deal with one day of this. And she knows that undoubtedly, someone more popular will do something more scandalous over the weekend, and the gossip circles will have moved on from a simple breakup.

As soon as she walks into the school, she notices that people are staring at her. She ignores it, because what is she going to do? There's nothing she _can_ do. She's the girl who just broke up with _Finn Hudson_. (If people didn't say she was crazy before, they most definitely will now.)

When she rounds the corner to head to her locker, she notices Noah and Finn engaged in a quiet conversation, and her heart falls. What could they possibly be talking about? Her, of course. She's not being conceited, it's just got to be true. The good thing, she supposes, is that they're actually talking, not yelling, not fighting, not punching one another. She thinks that might mean something. She hopes it does.

She hears Finn's laugh as she's organizing her books for her first class, and she glances over to see he and Noah walking towards her. They both pass without a word. Finn smiles weakly, and Noah smirks, and they just keep going.

She hates that there's a part of her that's really disappointed that Noah didn't stop to talk. She understands, of course, why he didn't. But it's almost like they didn't talk for 40 minutes the night before.

She decides that she needs to get to her class before anyone (anyone in glee, rather) can stop her and dig for the whole story. She's not ready to tell it yet, and she doesn't care if weird or awful rumors circulate until she can set everyone (Kurt) straight and let them spread the truth.

She spends her whole first class wondering what truth she wants to tell. She thinks she'll leave Noah out of it all together. She and Finn's relationship came to a natural end, and their breakup was mutual. It may not be scandalous, and it may not be dishy, but it's pretty much the truth. You know, give or take a few details.

When she gets to her locker after her first class, her Blackberry is blinking to tell her she's got a text. She clicks it, checking who it's from, and when she looks up, she sees the very person who's texting her standing at the other end of the hall, phone in his hand, like he's waiting for her response.

_Morning. Sry bout b4._

She smiles and looks up at him again, but he's talking with Matt, who's walking down the hall backwards, shouting his responses.

_It's ok. I understand._ She watches him as he smiles and reads the message, then keys out a response to her. She thinks this is kind of sexy, almost, standing at opposite ends of the hall, texting one another while no one else knows.

_Q & I going out for lunch 2day. U in? _

She bites her lip and wonders how weird that would be. Going out to lunch with your ex-boyfriend's ex-girlfriend, who just happens to be your future (fingers crossed) boyfriend's baby's mother? Weird. _Twilight zone_ weird. But then she looks down the hall and he smiles in her general direction.

She doesn't even get a chance to write him a message. Apparently he already knows the answer she was about to give.

_Meet at my truck. _

_Ok. See you then_. She puts her phone back into her locker and reaches for her books, but the screen lights up again and she laughs to herself.

_Ur legs look fckn hot in that skirt._

She tips her head back and laughs, and she sees him smiling at the end of the hall. She should have known that he wouldn't be able to keep his texts clean.

And she likes it.

----

Lunch isn't nearly as awkward as Rachel feared. Mostly because Kurt ended up inviting himself. (_"Rachel, you cannot run from me!" _he shouted, following her to Puck's truck.) Puck just shook his head, Quinn laughed, and Rachel groaned. Puck told Kurt to get in and keep the squealing to a minimum.

So they sit in a booth at a local diner, Puck and Rachel on one side, Quinn and Kurt on the other. Quinn's craving a strawberry milkshake, and Rachel orders chocolate (though the sugar and dairy are horrendous for her vocal chords). Kurt goes into a lecture about how many calories are in milkshakes, but Quinn reaches for his hand and places it on her stomach where the baby is kicking, and he gets all teary (Puck rolls his eyes) when Kurt says that what baby wants, baby gets. Rachel laughs, and Puck's hand grazes her leg just above her knee, and she sips her shake to keep from either mewling or telling him to cut it out.

"So, can we talk about..." Kurt starts, but Puck sends him what he assumes is supposed to be a terrifying look. (Puck's threats are much less scary when you get to know him.) "Can we talk about the elephant in the room?"

"Kurt, I'd rather..."

"Spill, Berry," Quinn says dangerously, though there's a smile on her face. She's met with three surprised looks. "What? I'm pregnant!"

"You can't use that as an excuse for everything, you know," Puck says seriously. Quinn shrugs her shoulder and Rachel just laughs.

"There's nothing to spill. Finn and I just aren't right for each other," Rachel explains. She reaches for a french fry from Noah's plate, and he glares, but she doesn't care.

"But you guys look so pretty together," Kurt gushes. His eyes are all soft, and Rachel looks to her plate, and Puck thinks he wants to puke.

He scoffs instead, and then everyone looks at him. "What?" he asks. "Just because people look good together, that don't mean shit."

"Noah, your vocabulary, along with your grammar, is appalling," Rachel says, scrunching her nose. He narrows his eyes at her.

"I'm just sayin'. If it worked like that, there'd be no ugly people in the world," he explains. Quinn and Kurt exchange looks while Rachel stares at Noah. "No one looks good with ugly people. _Hence_, no procreation. _Hence_, no ugly babies who grow up to be ugly adults."

He sits back in his seat, very pleased with himself, and he tosses a fry into his mouth before crossing his arms and smirking smugly.

"That actually make sense," Kurt says slowly.

"You used the word 'procreation' properly in a sentence," Rachel adds.

"And hence. Twice," Quinn says in complete confusion.

"It's called growth, ladies," Puck says, staring at Kurt, who starts laughing.

They don't talk about the breakup any more after that.

----

"Do you think we look good together?" she asks as they walk down the empty hallway towards her locker after glee practice.

She didn't want to ask, but it's been bugging her. She thinks they do, but she's interested in his take on the subject.

"You fuckin' kidding me?" he asks, looking over at her. "We're hot together."

"Noah," she giggles. "I'm serious."

"So am I!" he says. "In the words of a wise and very sexy man, we're a couple of good looking Jews."

She rolls her eyes and shakes her head, but she's still smiling, and he thinks that she likes him exactly the way he is.

----

He's standing in kitchen on Saturday afternoon, eating a sandwich over the sink (plates are for suckers) when his phone vibrates in his pocket. He reaches for it, ignoring his mother's protests of how disgusting it is for him to stand there, eating and talking on the phone.

"'S'a text," he says with his mouth full, and she scowls at him and mutters something in Yiddish.

_I'm bored. What are you doing tonight?_

Oh, Rachel. The girl doesn't understand what a text like that'll do to a guy. He polishes off the last of his mid-day snack and leaves the kitchen. He waits until he's in his room with the door closed before he dials her number.

"You didn't have to call. A text would have sufficed," she says, not even bothering to say hello.

"Good to hear your voice too, babe," he says.

"I'm sorry," she laughs. "I just wasn't expecting a call, that's all."

Maybe it's the message she just sent him, but his mind immediately goes into the gutter (okay, that's pretty much its permanent residence) and he wonders what she's doing. And what she's wearing. And if she's thinking of him when she's doing what he hopes she's doing and wearing...well, nothing. (He really doesn't get it when his teachers say he lacks imagination.)

"What're you doing?" he asks, settling back against his mattress.

She must be able to sense his tone, because she scoffs into the phone and says, "nothing gross," like he already knows the answer and she's disgusted that he'd even think it. It makes him laugh. "I just finished my homework for the weekend, as well as cleaning my room, all three of our bathrooms, the kitchen, and the living room. I also cleaned out our storage space and alphabetized daddy's bookshelves."

He's silent for a moment. Wanna know what he's done today? Kicked ass on four levels of Halo and polished off a sandwich.

"You're a freak," he tells her. "Seriously. That's fucked up."

"Yes, well, it seems I've grown accustomed to having plans on Saturdays," she says, and he knows she's talking about she and Finn's brunches and fucking flower smelling or whatever the hell it is they did together. "So are you free later or not?"

"Santana's having a party. I said I'd go."

"Oh." (She hates that there's a small part of her that wonders what kind of affect Santana still has on Noah. She doesn't like jealousy.)

"Come with me," he says without missing a beat.

"Noah, I haven't been invited," she tells him.

"It's a fucking _party_, Rachel, not an afternoon tea. No one'll care that you're there. Remember the last party you crashed?" he asks, and a smile spreads across his lips, because he remembers that as a really good night (until she left with Finn, anyway).

"Well, I suppose if no one would mind, I could make an appearance."

"An appearance? You're not famous yet," he laughs, and he hears her huff through the line. "I'll pick you up at 8:30. Wear something sexy. Seriously, like...something really hot."

Neither knows it, but they're both doing an inventory of her wardrobe at the same time, trying to think of the perfect outfit. Okay, so Puck's just trying to think of what she'll look hottest in. Rachel's thinking that maybe her wardrobe should be organized prismatically, and maybe she'll do that this afternoon.

"Can I ask you a question?" she asks. She doesn't wait for an answer. "This...us...are you okay with what we are right now?"

"No," he answers seriously.

"Oh."

"You know what I want. We're still in this lame friends area right now," he says.

"Right. Well, I did just break up with my boyfriend two days ago. People already talk about me, call me names. I don't think I need to add fuel to that fire by dating you, his best friend, within 48 hours of breaking up with him," she explains.

And okay, he can kind of get that.

"So what, are we talkin' like, 50 hours? 100?" he asks. He's kind of joking, but at the same time, he really just wants to have her all to himself. She lets out a sigh, and he thinks he's taken it too far. "Sorry."

"No! No, you make a good point," she says seriously. "And I hate...I mean I really, really hate...that I'm asking this of you, because it's the same thing Finn asked of me, and I was so upset with him for it, but..."

"Spit it out, Rach."

"You know I want to be with you, Noah. That hasn't been made a secret," she tells him. Her voice is all quiet, and it makes him smile. He likes the girly, less insane side of her. (Fuck it. He likes all sides of her.) "But maybe we could just keep things quiet for a little while."

He wants to roll his eyes. He doesn't give a fuck about anyone else or anything else, really. He just wants to be her boyfriend, and that's a pretty monumental thing. He's starting to think she doesn't really get that. He doesn't _do_ being a boyfriend. He's making a big fucking exception with her.

And it's for that very reason that he thinks he can go along with it. He wants her in whatever ways he can have her. And the way he sees it, he's got time now to remind her why she should want to flaunt the fact that she's with him in everyone's faces.

"Whatever. That's fine," he says.

"Really? Are you sure? Because if you'd rather..."

"We still get to make out?" he asks, as though the whole scenario hinges on this one clause.

She giggles and says, "yes."

"Alright then. We'll just see how long this lasts."

"What does that mean?"

"It means, Rachel Berry, that I'm going to woo the shit out of you, and you're gonna want to show everyone who your studly, sexy, perfect fucking boyfriend is," he tells her.

(Oh, he is _so_ the man.)

"Oh. Well. That's...That's um...something to look forward to, I suppose," she says.

He smirks to himself. Yup. _The man_.

"I'll pick you up at 8:30. Be ready."

"I'll see you then," she says, and he wonders if she knows just how sexy she sounds.

----

She's chosen her outfit for the evening (and organized her closet). She's washed her hair and blown it dry and curled the ends. She's eaten dinner.

She's still bored.

So she reaches for her phone and types out a message for him.

_Come early. I'd like to kiss you. _

She's never been so brazen. She thinks Noah brings it out in her.

----

He shows up at 7:00, just as she's finishing up the dishes from her dinner. She's already wearing her outfit for the party, dark skinny jeans tucked into black books, and a black top with satin trim and a low-cut back. She quickly dries her hands and wipes the counter, then heads for the door.

She opens it, and there stands Noah, and he's looking her up and down immediately. He smiles. She takes that as an approval of sorts.

He doesn't say anything, and the door isn't even closed when he leans forward and kisses her.

"So hot," he says against her lips, and she laughs and pushes the door closed.

All she can think is that these kisses feel even better, _so_ much better, without the guilt attached to them. And that's a scary thought because they were pretty fantastic before. She lets her arms twine around his neck as he wraps his around her waist, and he pulls away abruptly before they make it to the stairs.

"What?" she asks, her eyes searching his.

"Dads?"

"Out."

She leans forward to kiss him again, but he pulls away. "You have _two_ fucking dads," he says (and he doesn't mean it in the vulgar way.)

"Yes," she draws out in confusion.

"Two dads, Rachel. Dads hate me. _Hate_. It's the mohawk. Or maybe the fact that I'm an ass. You have two of 'em."

She shakes her head, smiles and pulls him toward her. "You're not an ass," she says. He raises his brow and she laughs. "You're not _always_ an ass. And my dads like you. You're Jewish and you've helped me through everything."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," he says, moving his hands to her hips and pushing her away. "Just how much do they know about me?"

She shrugs (he tries not to notice how sexy her collarbone looks when she does it). "I tell them everything."

"Everything?!" he practically shouts. "Fuck, Rach!"

"Not..._every_thing," she says. "They don't know about...this." She kisses his along jaw line, and he sighs into her ear. "But they know you're sweet with me, and that when I needed help, you were there."

"You make me sound like a good guy."

"You are a good guy," she says seriously. Her hands run over the back of his plaid button down, and he can't help the way his thumbs trace circles on her sides. "You are to me." He sighs again and she actually smiles at him. "Can we stop talking about my fathers now?" she asks. She takes both his hands in hers and pulls away, walking backwards towards the stairs. "Are you forgetting my message?"

There is no way in hell he could forget her message. He almost lost it when he read it the first time.

She kind of shoves him onto her bed when they get into her room, and she smiles at him (a dirty little smile, if he had to classify it) before she moves to sit on top of him. He honestly thinks he's in heaven. His life has gone from shit to pure awesome in approximately two days, and he's still not entirely sure how that's possible.

But it's all really, really hard to think about when she's straddling his hips and letting her hair fall around her face like this.

She's his girlfriend. Finally. His fucking _girlfriend_. Or something. It's a secret, and it's a mess, and Finn'll probably be pissed (though he got a mini-lecture from his best friend yesterday morning about treating Rachel right, so he thinks that's like, his blessing or something). But she's his, in whatever ways she is, and he'll take her in whatever ways he can.

Oh, the thought of taking her is a little much. But fuck it, because _she's his_. He can think of her however he wants to now, even if the situation is all fucked up and they don't have a label on what they are, and he has no idea when they'll get it all sorted out. Because honestly? It's no one else's fucking business.

He notices she doesn't push his hand away when he gropes (that's a harsh word, but it's what he knows) her through her shirt. She actually mewls a little into his mouth, and he's thinking that this party is the worst idea ever. _Ever_. Leaving her bedroom? Also bad.

She nips at the skin of his jaw line, and he lets out a groan. He can literally feel her smiling against his skin. "Fuck, baby."

She pulls away and smiles seductively. "You said some boys like that."

He's confused for a second, then he remembers that conversation from so long ago, her near tears and him trying to lighten the mood. He wonders if she remembers _everything_. He wonders what else he's told her that she's going to use against him. Or _on_ him. Whatever.

"I fucking love it," he says, and she giggles as he flips her onto her back.

They don't end up leaving her house until quarter after nine. She doesn't complain when she has to redo her hair (she actually likes that he seems to love running his hands through it), and he doesn't complain when he has to sit there and watch her touch up her makeup (watching her apply lip gloss is becoming one of his favourite past times.)

----

As soon as they walk into the party, people are talking about Rachel and looking at her like she's some kind of charity case. She sets her posture and lets on that she doesn't notice, but Puck is none too happy. The way he sees it, everyone needs to back the fuck off.

When they walk into the living room, they realize why everyone's talking.

Finn's making out with one of the freshman Cheerios. In front of everybody. Puck seriously wants to kick that guy's ass sometimes. Maybe he didn't know that Rachel was coming, and maybe Puck and Rachel just made out for a good couple of hours (a _great_ couple of hours) but doing this in front of half the school? Not cool.

"I need a drink," Rachel says, and they walk into the kitchen.

Mike hands her a vodka cooler when she asks for something, and everyone smiles and cheers when she takes her first sip. It's a long one. Puck's worried. "Easy, Berry," he says, but he's smiling, because she's kind of awesome.

"I'm fine," she insists, and the way she looks at him makes him almost believe her. She needed something to take the edge off. He knows that feeling.

He grabs a bottle of water from the fridge and leans back against the counter, talking with Mike and smiling as Rachel and Brittany start talking with one another. He can tell Brittany isn't talking about Finn, and Rachel is smiling and taking sips of her drink. She looks shockingly normal, like a teenaged girl who's been to more than two parties in her life.

She finishes her first drink and Brittany hands her another. She likes this lightheaded feeling. She thinks this is what people call 'a buzz'. It's enjoyable. She's actually having a nice conversation with Brittany and Santana, and when Quinn comes over, they all hug (and it's not a drunk thing, it's a 'friends' thing, Rachel thinks). Quinn quietly asks Rachel if she's okay, and she doesn't say Finn's name, but Rachel knows that's what she's talking about. They talk about it a little bit, and Quinn is really understanding, and when Rachel says she appreciates it, the girls just smile at one another.

When they turn and notice Noah looking their way, Quinn bumps Rachel's hip with her own, and Rachel is sure her cheeks turn red. Apparently, everyone is on to them. She's pretty sure they won't be staying a secret for long. Maybe it's the alcohol or the way he's looking at her or the way his button down shirt looks on him, but she wants nothing more than to just walk over and kiss him _right now_.

They all migrate into the den, and Puck slouches onto the couch while people around him talk. Rachel's on her third drink, and they've been at the party for a couple hours. He's looking out for her, and he'll step in if he thinks she's drinking too much, too fast, because he knows she's never been drunk before.

And damn, she looks good. Her face is lit up, like she's having a really good time, and every so often, he notices her mouthing the words to whatever song is playing. She glances at him every so often, but she plays it way cooler than he does (shocking, he knows). She smiles, but covers it by turning back to the conversation and smiling with whoever she's talking to. He's just fucking staring at her. He doesn't care. Sure, they'll 'keep it quiet' and he'll go along with that, but he's still gonna check her out if he wants to. She can't take that away from him.

He wants to punch something when he sees who's coming towards him, flopping down on the sofa next to him.

"So tell me, handsome," Kurt says. (Puck cringes. He's been to enough parties with the kid to know that Kurt gets even more talkative and chick-like when he's drinking.) "How long have you been in love with Rachel?"

Puck almost spits out his water. "Dude. I'm not fucking in love with Rachel," he says seriously, because really? _What the fuck? _

"Oh, honey. So pretty, yet so dense," Kurt says, petting Puck's shoulder.

(Seriously, the kid's gonna lose a fucking hand if he's not careful.)

"I'm not in love with her. She's hot, and I like her. She's...tolerable."

(He's such a liar. Tolerable? Really?)

Kurt arches his brow and takes another sip of whatever fruity (no really, it's like, pomegranate or some shit) drink he's got in his hand. "My mistake," he says in a sing-songy voice.

He gets up and walks away, shaking his hips to the music, and Puck just scoffs and mumbles something derogatory under his breath.

It sucks being the sober one at the party. It really sucks.

But whatever. There's no way he'd drink and drive, because he's not that fucking stupid, and he's driving Rachel home. She probably wouldn't even get into the car if he'd had a drink, and he knows she'd yack his ear off about being responsible if he even _smelled_ a beer. And it's not like he hates listening to her talk, he doesn't. He actually likes it. A lot. Her voice is nice when it's just the two of them and she's not being crazy about song choices and fucking...whatever else it is she gets all intense about in rehearsals. When they're alone, she's this sweet, quiet girl who says funny things and has a different smile.

He watches her, standing across the room, talking to Mercedes and Matt, and he can't help but stare when she tips back her head and laughs. She's got a sexy neck. It's stupid to think, because it's just a neck, and he's not, you know, a vampire (though, that'd be kinda badass, he thinks, and chicks are so all over vamps these days; but he's getting off topic, here). But her neck is slim and the perfect length, and then there's her little necklace (also sexy; that little gold XO is totally hot). He knows what her pulse feels like beneath his palm, because he likes touching her neck when he kisses her.

She catches him staring, and he thinks he might be like, blushing or something (what the fuck?). Then she sends him a little wink when no one else is looking, and he thinks two things. One, how fast can he get her somewhere alone? And two, how much _has_ she had to drink? He likes her and all (she's a lot more than just tolerable...) but he doesn't want to have to carry her ass anywhere. Though she's all light and stuff, and she'd probably like it, and she'd probably giggle and kiss his cheek, which would be pretty awesome, and...

Holy _fuck_.

He's totally in love with her.

He needs some air.

Rachel watches him get up and walk through the sliding door at the side of the room. She finishes the last of her drink and walks to the kitchen to set the empty bottle among the others, then she walks out onto the deck. It's cold out, but when she sees him, she wraps her arms around him from behind, and his body heat warms her up immediately. He laughs a little when she peers at him around his shoulder.

"Hi," she says, pulling away from him so she can stand beside him.

"You're having a good time," he says. He notices the way her eyes are a little glazed over and her cheeks are a little flushed. She's extra touchy-feely, and she can't stop smiling.

She is so drunk.

"This party is _fun_," she tells him. "Matt and I did shots!"

"You did, did you?" he asks, shaking his head. Matt's such a fucking shit disturber. "How many?"

"Just two," she says. "They were good." He laughs again and nods at her. She's kind of a cute drunk. She's just all happy and stuff, happier than usual. She slips her hand into his, and he thinks she's out of her mind. "Come with me."

Not like he's gonna say no, but she's so sexy right now, _too_ sexy, and he wonders what's going through that crazy-ass brain of hers.

"Rachel..."

She's biting her lip and walking backwards, then she turns and walks briskly around the deck. When she peers through another sliding door and sees that there's an empty room on the other side, she smiles at him before pulling the door open. It appears they're in an office or something, with books along the walls, a desk and a big leather couch. Puck's been to Santana's place before, but he's never seen this room.

Rachel pushes him back onto the sofa and he stops thinking about anyone else. She rests her hands on his shoulders and straddles his lap, and he thinks two things. One, she so wants him, and two, he doesn't know how to handle this. There's no way he's going to have sex with her like this, her drunk, at a party, and on someone else's couch. No way.

But then she kisses him, and her hands are on his face. She mewls a little when his hands slide up her sides, and he can't help but think of how badly he wants her, even though he knows this isn't happening tonight (stupid conscience.)

She can feel the contour of his muscles through his shirt, and she runs her hands down his chest and over his stomach. She wonders why they came to this party at all, why they didn't just stay home alone at her place. That would have made so much more sense. He sucks in a breath when she pushes up his shirt a little bit and her hand grazes his skin. She loves that he's so responsive to her touch. She loves that all those little sounds he makes let her know exactly how she makes him feel.

She pulls away from him and their eyes lock when she reaches for the bottom of her shirt. He reaches for her hands. "Rachel..."

"What?" she asks, all coy.

This is the most difficult thing he's ever had to do. He's sure of it. "Just...slow down."

She leans forward and kisses a line along his jaw, and he grips her hips a little tighter when her lips run over the spot they both know he loves. He can't help himself. His hands slip beneath the fabric of her shirt to rest on the skin of her sides, and he moves his thumbs in slow circles, which she must love, because she pushes herself even closer to him.

"I want to," she breathes into his ear.

(Holy shit, he should win a _prize_ for what he's about to do.)

"I can see that, baby, but..."

"No _but_." She pulls away from him a little bit and closes her eyes as she takes a deep breath. "I want you. I want it to be you."

(He honestly doesn't think she could say any more perfect things. Referencing the fact that he'd be her first? Almost impossible to say no to.)

"_Rachel_."

"Trust me," she says, wrapping her arms around his neck again. Her voice is fucking insanely seductive when she murmurs, "don't you want to?" in his ear.

He doesn't know where she learned this shit. Seriously. (There's_ no way_ Finn would have been able to handle it.) "God. Fuck, yes, but I..." He places his hands on her forearms to keep her from touching him. "I want nothing more than to...do what you're asking me to."

"So do it," she says.

And he's fucking _tempted_.

Her lids fall closed slowly as she sits on his lap, and she takes his lack of a response to mean that she should kiss him again, and he just can't stop her. She tastes like vodka and raspberries and trouble. He _loves_ it.

But for once, he's going to be the decent guy and not act on impulse, not do what he wants because he wants it. Not with Rachel.

"You're drunk," he says, kind of laughing. He doesn't think she means for her hips to rock against his when she pulls away, looking as offended as she can. "And you don't want to regret this."

"I won't."

"I'm not gonna take that chance, okay?" he says sweetly. He takes her hands and holds them against her legs. "Look, in 12 hours when you're sober, if you still want a piece of this, you come find me, okay, baby?"

She lets out a huff and glares at him, then climbs off his lap and stomps away from him, slamming the door behind her. (But not before giving him one last withering glance.)

He doesn't know what the fuck just happened. He just turned down sex with a hot virgin (who he's not pretty sure he loves.) He had her sitting on his lap and practically begging him, and he said no. He's crazy about her, and she's finally single (though just barely) and he knows that she meant it when she said she wanted to. And he_ turned her down_.

This growing up shit _sucks_.


	9. Chapter 9

She wakes up with a splitting headache, an ache in her bones, a dry mouth and an upset stomach. Oh god. If this is what a hangover feels like, then why would anybody ever drink? She buries her face in the pillow before realizing that the dark green sheets definitely aren't hers. They're soft and comfortable, but they certainly don't smell like her.

They smell like...

"'Mornin', babe."

She closes her eyes again, but rolls onto her back to see Noah sitting up, his back against his headboard as he plays a video game on mute.

She still looks cute, because she's always cute, but her eyes are bloodshot and there are dark remnants of her makeup clinging to her skin. Her lips look dry and her hair is an absolute disaster. And he cannot stop looking at her. He pauses his game just so he can safely stare a little bit.

She lets out a grunt (seriously, a _grunt_, and he's surprised, because it's not a sound he ever expected her to make) and pulls the blankets up over her.

"Why'm I here?" she asks.

He laughs a little. "Well, I figured your dads wouldn't want to see their little girl all drunk as shit." Her eyes snap open again and she looks scared. "I texted 'em from your phone saying you were staying at Santana's."

She mumbles what might be a thank you, and he hands her a bottle of Gatorade and two Advil. He watches as she sits up and tosses back the pills, swallowing a gulp of the drink with a grimace. He honestly doesn't know how she didn't throw up the night before. She'd probably feel better right now if she had. She lays back down, but not before noticing what she's wearing. And not wearing.

"Did you...Noah, you pervert!" she says, punching his arm. He cowers from her and looks at her like he's nuts. "I'm not wearing pants!?"

"_You_ took 'em off. Totally not me, babe."

"You let me!?" she asks. He raises his brow, because it's clear she doesn't remember anything about the night before. He waits for her to realize it. Her cheeks flush red and she buries her face in her hands. "Oh my god." She sinks into the mattress and lays on her side. "Oh my _god_!"

"Ah, the morning after recollections," he says fondly.

"Don't use big words."

"Now you know how I feel," he teases, laughing. She's still got her face in her hands and she's not looking at him. It's obvious she's embarrassed, but he doesn't think she should be. "Rachel, look at me."

"No," she pouts. "I can't. I'm _mortified_."

"No worries. You're not the first girl to beg me for it at a party," he says with a grin. _So_ the wrong thing to say. She sniffles and wipes her eyes. Fuck. She's crying? "Rach, c'mon. It's not a big deal."

"It's a huge deal! I almost...we could have..."

"We didn't," he reminds her. "I'm not that much of a jackass." Even in her foggy state, she can very clearly remember the rejection. She thinks that might sting more than anything. She turns away from him a little more, laying so there's more space between them. "I didn't want to say no. _Trust_ _me_," he says seriously. "I just knew Sober Rachel wouldn't appreciate Drunk Rachel giving away her virginity."

"Stop talking about it. Please," she almost whispers.

He switches off the television and sinks down into the bed so that his chest is pressed against her back, and he rests his hand on her hip. "You okay?" he asks.

She's surprised by how sweet he's being. Of course, he's still making fun of her, but it's not cruel, and he's actually making her feel slightly better for making a complete fool of herself. The fact that he's telling her it's no big deal actually puts her at ease. He knows she's embarrassed and he's not going to pick on her until she breaks.

And he said he wanted her, so that helps a little bit too.

"I feel like...this is terrible," she says, and he laughs a little bit. His breath hits her neck and she closes her eyes, because as awful and embarrassing as all this is, she doesn't hate laying in his bed. "I'm wearing your football jersey."

He laughs again. "Yeah."

"It's scratchy."

"I told you it would be," he tells her. "You made me give it to you." She groans again and he runs his hand over her hip gently. "Said you'd never slept in a guys' clothes before."

"I'm such a loser," she says, shaking her head.

"You're not." He kisses her temple, and it startles her for some reason. "And you look sexy as hell in it."

She smiles and bites her lip, though he can't see. "Yeah?"

"Oh, hell yeah, baby," he murmurs. He sweeps her hair aside and presses a few kisses along the back of her neck.

"I'm sorry I'm such a mess."

"You're not a mess," he tells her. She turns so she's laying on her back, and he's propped up on his elbow, looking down at her. She raises her brow. "Okay, maybe a little." She elbows him in the stomach and he laughs. "You know, you're the first girl who's ever like, slept in my bed."

"Really?"

"Don't sound so shocked. Damn."

She smiles and shifts a little, getting more comfortable, and she settles her hand over his as it lays on her stomach. She bites her lip and her eyes are all soft when she says, "I like that I'm the first."

She's trying to fucking kill him, he's sure of it. She's laying in his bed, in his jersey, looking super hot and saying things like that, that have more meaning than anyone else would assume.

"Say something," she says, almost pleadingly. She does not want to feel embarrassed any more. It's a terrible feeling.

"You don't wanna hear what I have to say in response to that," he tells her, and turns on her side and buries her face in his chest again.

"Can we never talk about last night again?" she asks. He thinks she's serious. He presses a kiss to her forehead and runs his hand over her hip. "But thank you for...for not..."

"C'mon," he kind of scoffs. She pulls away a little and looks at him in confusion. "We both know it's gonna happen. Just not like that."

She's got a really strange feeling low in her stomach. It's a good feeling. They both know it's gong to happen. The thought of him seeing her that way isn't scary (it was with that other boy) and she thinks (knows) Noah will be better at it anyway. She dated Finn for almost two months, and she's been with Noah (sort of) for only a day or something, but she's already decided she's going to sleep with him at some point. It was never really a topic of discussion with Finn, and she realizes now how strange that was. They made out and whatever, but it never progressed past second base.

Puck doesn't say anything else, just lets her lay there next to him, thinking about whatever she's thinking about (he has a pretty good idea, and he's not going to interrupt that).

"I didn't do anything else embarrassing, did I?" she asks. "I mean, in front of people?"

"No," he laughs. "You decided you wanted to leave pretty much right after...after."

She doesn't think he's ever spoken so delicately about anything. She really appreciates it.

"And I wanted to leave with you?" She's sort of joking, but sort of not. She can remember now how that happened, how she walked up to him and, in a show of just how talented an actress she is, acted like nothing had happened and told him she wanted to go.

"C'mon. You want me to take you home?" he asks. She shakes her head and slings her arm up over his waist. He doesn't hate that.

"I don't want to leave your bed yet," she admits quietly.

He thinks she laughs when he has to take a deep breath.

----

They stay in bed until well after noon, and Puck teases her for slacking off and being hungover, and she pouts (it's seriously cute) and he kisses her. His mom is working, and his sister is staying with his aunt and uncle for the weekend, so they have the house to themselves, and Puck is really thankful for that, because he keeps making her giggle and stuff, and he's sure that his mom would barge in and check to make sure he wasn't corrupting anyone. And he might be, but not _that_ way, and Rachel doesn't seem to mind anyway.

She tells him his sweetness is unnerving, and he laughs and reminds her that he's got some wooing to do. The smile on her face as she curls closer to him tells him she doesn't hate this whole plan of his. If he's being honest, it's not taking much; she hasn't even seen his A game yet.

She makes him close his eyes when she finally stands from the bed, but he peeks (honestly, did she think he wouldn't?) and whatever, it's not like her skirts are any longer than the jersey she's wearing anyway. Of course, he tells her this.

She surprises the hell out of him when she looks at him with a raised brow, reaches for the bottom of the jersey, and pulls it up over her head. She's wearing red panties and a matching bra with little white hearts on 'em, and _oh my fuck_, he has to sit up just so he can be closer to her.

And even the night before, she had the presence of mind to step into his bathroom to change. Right now she's standing in front of him in just her underwear, hands on her perfectly curvy hips, and wherever this confident girl came from, he hopes she never, ever goes back. Good lord, she's hot.

"Rachel," he says, and it's kind of a growl. She just smiles and reaches for her top from where it's draped over his desk chair. "Who _are_ you right now?"

She sets the shirt at the end of the bed and sits next to him. She's not surprised at all when he immediately rests his hand on her thigh (his fingertips brush against the edge of her underwear, and she's never felt anything so sexy.)

She leans forward to kiss him and says one word against his lips that almost knocks the wind out of him.

"Yours."

(She can't believe she's acting like this, but Noah makes her feel so beautiful, so sexy, that she thinks she _wants_ to show him all of her.)

He reaches up, rests his hand at the back of her neck and pulls her into a kiss, and if she didn't pull away, there's no way he would have. _Goddamn_, she's sexy.

And _his_.

"Would it be okay if I had a shower?" she asks. He groans and lays back against his pillow. "What?"

"You. Showering. In my bathroom."

"If it's a problem, I can..."

He smirks at her. She's so naive sometimes. "The only problem will be me knowing you're naked on the other side of that door," he tells her. She blushes and he runs his hand over the smooth skin of her thigh.

"You're not very subtle," she says, as though they aren't both already fully aware of that fact.

"Says the girl sitting on my bed in her underwear," he scoffs. He can tell it makes her nervous immediately, so he smiles sits up to kiss her. His statement definitely wasn't a complaint. "Just lock the door."

She laughs and stands to gather her things, and she doesn't have to look at him to know that he's checking her out as she crosses the room into the bathroom.

He spends the next 25 minutes (seriously, who takes a 25 minute shower?) thinking about her and her body and thinking that he's a fucking _champ_ for not having sex with her when she was begging for it. Of course, he's still glad he didn't, and he knows he was right, but damn, that girl makes him crazy. It's like when she's mellow, he inherits all her insanity. It's weird. He likes it, which is even weirder.

The door opens a crack, and he's laying on his now-made bed, dressed in jeans and a tee shirt. He looks up and sees just her head poking out, hair wet and face free of makeup. He can see her bare shoulder and the top of the towel she's got wrapped around herself, no matter how discreet she's trying to be. He knows she's not teasing him on purpose. If he thought she was, he wouldn't let her get away with it.

"Noah, could you pass me my bag?" she asks. He looks at her like she's crazy, but he figures that since her bag is roughly the size of, oh, a tank, she's probably got one or two things in there that she needs. He grabs it and crosses the room, and he forces himself (it's not easy) to look at her face when she pulls the door open to take it. "Thank you."

"You gonna be long? I'm fucking starving, babe."

"10 minutes!" she calls as she closes the door.

He's seriously surprised when she steps out before her 10 minutes are up. Her hair is braided over one shoulder, and she's wearing mascara (he can tell, because her lashes look crazy long) and lip gloss, and she smells like a mixture of his shampoo and her perfume. He wonders just what she has in that bag of tricks.

He wonders why she has to look so damn good all the time. Not that he's complaining.

"Hot," he says, and she blushes before walking out of the room and heading for the stairs.

----

"Post party tradition," he claims when she asks him what they're doing, exactly.

They stopped at McDonald's, which of course wasn't serving breakfast any more, but that's okay, since Rachel gives him the calorie intake of the average fast food breakfast and it kinda skeeves him out a little. But whatever. He still orders two burgers and a supersized order of fries and a Coke, and she orders nuggets and french fries and a diet Coke (he rolls his eyes, but she doesn't care). The leave the drive thru and she separates their food, and he picks at his fries as he drives.

She really does not expect that they'll end up at the lookout at the edge of town, which, she's heard, is a notorious makeout spot on any given night. He puts the truck in park and reaches for his food while he turns up the radio a little bit.

She's staring at him.

"Why is this your post party tradition?" she finally asks. He's impressed, though, because she went a good three minutes without saying anything.

"It's quiet, and it's got a kick ass view."

"Oh."

"Expecting a better explanation?" he asks, glancing over at her.

"Actually," she says, turning towards him, "I was expecting an explanation that involved something about...never mind."

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Rachel."

She bites her lip and winces as she looks at him, and he knows he's probably not going to like whatever it is she's about to say. "I just figured that maybe, you know, since it's so quiet and there's no one else around, you might have brought some...women here," she says, and he can tell she's not trying to offend him.

But okay, he's a little offended. He can't really blame her for assuming it, he guesses, but he's still wondering if that's really an issue for her, if she sees that as a big part of who he is. (It's not. He hasn't hasn't had sex in a _long_ ass time, and that's _totally_ her fault, actually, and even before then, he was only with Santana, then Quinn before that. This past summer was a whole different story, but whatever.)

He honestly has never brought a girl here before. For anything. He doesn't think Rachel would believe him if he told her that. Well, maybe she'd believe him because she trusts him (which is kind of an awesome thing) but she might question it because...well, because his reputation is what it is.

"No," he says simply.

"Noah, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to imply..."

"It's okay," he almost laughs. "I don't bring girls here. And it's been a long time since I...It's been a long time."

"How long?" she asks. He doesn't know if she's trying to catch him in a lie (which she won't be able to) or if she's just curious. Probably the latter.

"Months."

"Shut up," she says in disbelief. He just looks at her. "Are you serious? You're serious."

"Yeah, I'm serious. Everything went down, and I was kinda a mess for a while. And then you and Finn, and...I just couldn't," he explains with a shrug of his shoulder.

"Couldn't?" she chokes out.

He rolls is eyes and sighs in exasperation. "I _could_ have. Fuck. I'm not...that's _not_ a problem," he says, and she blushes a little bit. "I just couldn't...I didn't want to."

"Really?" she asks quietly.

He needs to try to explain this properly, but the way she's sitting there looking at him, he doesn't know how to do it. What words can he use to tell her why he made those choices.

For her. (God, he sounds like such a pansy.)

"Look, if I couldn't have you, I didn't want to just fuck around with anyone else, okay? Jesus," he says, slumping back against the seat, because dear God, did he really just say that to her?

She swears he can hear her heart, it's thumping so hard against her ribcage. But he's not looking at her, and she knows he's embarrassed or something (which she thinks is just crazy, considering the way she acted with him the night before). She scoots closer to him on the seat and rests her hand on his shoulder, and his eyes meet hers, and she thinks that the song coming through the radio is perfect. (Taylor Swift's Jump Then Fall, but she won't mention it to him, because he'd probably hate the song and switch it off.)

She leans over and kisses his cheek, and he looks at her like she's nuts. "That's actually quite sweet," she tells him.

"It's not sweet," he tells her. "It's _pathetic_."

She takes his face in her hands and pulls him into a kiss that has him moaning from low in his throat. "Then I like it when you're pathetic," she says laughingly.

Honestly, if it makes her kiss him like that? He's got no problem being pathetic _all the time_.

----

When he finally gets around to dropping her off at her place, it's late in the afternoon, and the only reason he's even parked in her driveway is because when she called her dads earlier, she told them she'd be home by five. Silly girl. Now all she wants is to spend the rest of her day with this boy whose hand was on her thigh all afternoon as they drove through town towards nothing at all.

He doesn't really want to leave her there, so he kisses her, and he doesn't let her pull away (not that she really tries). He doesn't know how long they make out in her driveway, but Puck thinks it's pretty awesome that her dads haven't come out to drag her inside. His truck isn't exactly quiet (he's got a sweet cool air intake that makes it sound fucking _awesome_).

When Rachel pulls away abruptly, he's totally confused until he notices a familiar car sitting next to them in the driveway, and Rachel's eyes are all big and worried as she rubs her lips gently with her fingertips.

"Finn. _Fuck_," Puck mumbles, tipping his head back against the headrest.

She doesn't say anything before hopping out of his truck and closing the door behind her. Well, he's not about to let those two talk without him listening in, and maybe that's selfish, but fuck it. She's not Finn's girl any more (never really was, if you ask Puck) and he's got a feeling that Finn's enough of an idiot to make her feel terrible without even meaning to.

So he gets out and sticks his hands in his pockets as he walks around the truck so he's standing next to her.

"Wow," Finn says awkwardly. "I uh...just...found some stuff at my place. Of yours. That you probably want back."

(Funny. Rachel has nothing of his.)

"Oh. Thank you," Rachel says. Finn hands over a bag of stuff, and she takes it from him.

"So, uh...you two didn't wait long."

Puck rolls his eyes. Of course. He's just about to say something (something that'll probably start a fight of some sort) when Rachel speaks up, stepping closer to Finn (and in between the two boys, like she already knows he'd throw a punch if he had to).

"As opposed to you, who was sucking face with that little blonde..._girl_!" Rachel says hotly. Puck tries (but it doesn't work) to hide his smile.

Finn looks to the ground. "I didn't know you were gonna be there."

"And I didn't know you were going to be coming over now." She puts her hand on her hip and literally _stares him down_.

"It's not like I'm dating her or anything," Finn says.

Puck knows how much of an idiot his best friend can be. Why is everyone else so blind to it? This is more proof. "Exactly," Puck mumbles.

Rachel shakes her head and lets out a humourless laugh. "You know I have feelings for Noah. I think the only feelings you have for that girl are...are in your pants!"

(Seriously? Puck wants to start laughing, but he knows that'd just get him in trouble. But she doesn't freak him out any more when she gets all intense like this.)

"How is that better?" Finn asks. "You kissed him while we were together, but I can't kiss someone after we've broken up? And anyway, you dumped me. Why do you care who I kiss at a party?"

Rachel scowls and takes a step closer to him (Puck thinks he might be the one breaking up a fight if Finn keeps talking). "_Maybe_ I'm mad because I had to practically beg you to hold my hand in the hallway, but you were sticking your tongue down her throat in front of half the school!"

"Rachel, come on," Finn tries, tilting his head at her. "You know with you I was just..."

"Thank you for dropping off my things. I'm going inside now," she says seriously. She doesn't want to hear his sorry excuses. She reaches for Puck's hand, and he's surprised, but he lets her take it.

Finn turns to her again when she starts towards the house. "Rach..."

"Finn, this isn't an appropriate time or place for a conversation. We can talk later, when I'm not busy or pissed off."

She drags Puck into the house, and she starts laughing as soon as the door is closed, and she covers her face with her hands, then falls against his chest. He runs his hands over her back, and he wonders if this is some weird chick thing where she's going to start crying any second.

After a minute (after watching Finn get back into his car and drive away) Puck starts laughing a little bit too, which makes Rachel pull away.

"What?" she asks.

"You swore," he says with a grin.

"I did not!"

"Did too! You said you were pissed off. I heard it."

She closes her eyes tightly, and he wraps her into a hug just in time for her two dads (dammit!) to walk into the foyer and see them standing there like that.

"Oh! Rachel, sweetie, I thought I heart your voice," the short one says. "Were you arguing with someone outside?"

(Yup, Puck thinks, her dads were totally aware that she was making out in the driveway.)

"Dad. I'm sorry. Finn was here, and...I _cursed_ at him," she admits. Puck laughs along with her dad, because apparently they both find it hilarious that she thinks saying one curse word is going to spell the end of the world or something. "It's not funny!"

"It's totally funny," Puck says.

"You remember Noah, right dad?" she asks, running her hand down her (boy?)friend's arm. He extends his hand to shake her dad's, and she thinks that's really sweet. "We're seeing one another."

Puck looks down at her, impressed that she's coming clean so quickly, and she's beaming up at him, so he winks at her.

"That's my girl. So beautiful all the boys want her," her dad says. She blushes and Puck settles his hand at the small of her back. "Stay for dinner, son."

"Oh, I wouldn't want to impose," Puck says. (_Impose_? Where'd _that_ come from?)

"Don't be silly. Come. We'll talk." The older man reaches for Puck's arm and leads him to the kitchen, and Rachel smiles and shakes her head as she drops her things in the hallway before calling that she's going to run upstairs and freshen up. Maybe it's cruel of her to leave Noah with her dads, but she knows he can hold his own with them.

When she joins them in the kitchen, she finds Noah sitting with her dad at the table, snacking on some bruschetta while her daddy puts the finishing touches on dinner. She walks over to the stove and kisses her daddy on the cheek, and he slings his arm around her shoulder in a side-hug, insisting that she taste the sauce he's working on, that it's one of his best.

Puck watches from his seat as she licks the spoon, then wipes a bit of sauce from her lip with her thumb. So sexy.

"Noah here is trying to tell me that you didn't consume any alcohol last night, bunny," her daddy says. She flushes red and glances to Noah, who is smiling not only because her dads are totally not naive, but because her nickname is _bunny_.

"I may have had a drink or two," she admits. "But I was responsible enough to stay overnight!"

(Little white lie. Or maybe a couple. Either way, it's no big deal, since she didn't really, necessarily, do anything all that wrong.)

All three men laugh, and she pouts a little bit because of course, they're all going to pick on her. But she actually likes it, because Noah seems totally comfortable in her kitchen with her family, and that other boy never really looked like he fit in. Maybe he tried with her dads, but not hard enough, or maybe too hard. Noah just is who he is, and while he might be cleaning up his vocabulary a little bit in their presence, he's not changing anything else about himself. She loves that he's not making apologies for who he is, and when he's asked about his mohawk, he laughs and tells the story of how he came to have it. (Pure teenage rebellion.)

She sits next to him, his arm draped lazily over the back of her chair as they all enjoy some cheesecake (he learns that it's her favourite) for dessert. Rachel tells her dads about the party and Finn and everything, and Puck realizes that she really does tell her dads almost everything. That might worry him if the 'almost' wasn't there. She's close with them, and he can tell they love her. Like, they love her mote than he's ever seen parents love a kid. It's intense, and they're one of those families that makes you not sure whether you want to be like them, or hate them. But he likes being around them. And they treat him well, like they like him, and they like him _with Rachel_, and he thinks that's pretty awesome.

He shocks the hell out of Rachel (and okay, that's the objective) when he insists that he help with dishes, and he tosses a dish towel towards Rachel, saying he'll wash and she can dry.

Seriously? This family is so easy to win over. Her dads slip into the living room, and that's when Puck learns that Rachel hums to herself (not a surprise) when she's doing idle chores. It's kind of sweet.

"My dads love you," she observes. He laughs softly. "And you were worried."

"I was worried they'd kick my ass if they walked into the house and I had you pressed against the wall," he says lowly.

"Noah!" she laughs, sending her elbow into his side. He just shrugs his shoulder and she kisses him quickly. "I admit that wouldn't have been ideal."

"I am pretty damn charming, aren't I?" he asks as hands her another plate.

When she leans over and kisses his cheek, her chest presses up against his arm, and then her eyes are all soft and sexy when she looks at him. "Quite," is all she says.

Once the kitchen is spotless (honestly, he thought doing the dishes was good enough, but Rachel's OCD, though she didn't appreciate him saying that, dictated that they wipe down every single surface) he tells her he should be going, and they kiss in her kitchen for a few minutes (she's backed up against the counter with her arms around his neck). He says goodbye to her dads and thanks them for dinner, and they tell him he's always welcome.

Rachel walks him to the door, and he kisses her forehead sweetly and tells her he'll see her the next day.

Just before the door shuts, he hears her content little sigh, and he smiles to himself as he tosses his keys in the air, then catches them.

Best day in a while. Hands down.

As he's driving home, he comes to a realization that makes him groan.

He's just had a kosher meal at his Jewish girlfriend's house and met her parents (and totally won them over, actually).

His mom is going to fucking _cry_ when he tells her.


	10. Chapter 10

Rachel's whole 'keep things with Noah quiet' plan lasts all of about five minutes on Monday morning. It's annoying, because he's wearing that shirt she loves, and he's waiting at her locker, standing there talking to Mike about something or another.

After the day they just spent, in his bed and in his truck and with her family, she's finding him even more attractive. Not because she laid next to him with her hand tucked beneath his tee shirt to rest on his stomach, or because he was so sweet to her, or because his kisses practically set her on fire. Maybe those are all factors (they definitely are) but she's just been reminded of how a boyfriend should act, how a boyfriend should treat her.

Who knew it'd be Noah Puckerman in that role?

He smiles at her, though he keeps talking to Mike, as she walks towards him, and she slips in between the two boys so she can get to her locker. "Good morning, Noah. Mike."

"Hey Rach," Mike says cordially. Rachel's sure Noah thinks he's being discreet when he shoots Mike a look that very clearly says _'dude, get out of here,'_ but she sees it, and she looks at Mike just in time to see him roll his eyes and laugh. "Later guys."

"That was somewhat rude, Noah. Not to mention unnecessary," she says. She's joking. She's not sure he picks up on that.

"Whatever. He was like, acting like a chick and trying to get info from me," he scoffs. She raises her brow in amusement. "About you. About us."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. Here," he says. He hands her a Starbucks cup, which she thinks is really sweet of him, because the only Starbucks in town is nowhere near his house or the school. "It's that chai shit you like."

"That's very sweet of you," she says before taking a sip.

"I remember that one day you had one when we were dating, and then you tasted all good and stuff," he says softly, leaning a little closer. "You told me what it was, and...I dunno. Whatever. Happy Monday."

She can tell he's all flustered (which is really cute, actually, because he's always so confident). "You remembered that?"

He shrugs his shoulder and smirks at her lazily. "You tasted like cinnamon. And then I thought of that Neil Young song. You know? Cinnamon Girl?"

"I really like that song," she says, smiling up at him. More and more students are filtering into the halls, milling around, and she doesn't care.

"I'll play it for you some time," he promises her. Her eyes do that thing where they get all big and shiny, like they do any time he does something she thinks is sweet.

Seriously? He's _awesome_ at this boyfriend shit. Who knew?

"You know it?"

He shrugs again, and she steps a little closer, but he's not sure whether if she really means to. "Learned it for ya."

She lets out a little breath and shakes her head, and she reaches up, settles her hand at the back of his neck, and kisses him once, just gently. He's too surprised to kiss her back.

He said he was going to woo her, but he didn't think it'd be this easy. Sure, he knows he already has her, but this public display of...whatever, is a little bit of a shock. Two days ago she was saying she wanted to keep things between them. He's pretty happy, though, because all he's wanted for so long is her, and he doesn't give a shit that she just broke up with Finn.

And honestly, everyone in school knows better than to talk about his girlfriend in any kind of negative way.

Also? Fuck 'em. They're gonna think what they want anyway. He doesn't really care, as long as he knows where he stands with Rachel.

"What was that?" he asks.

"A kiss."

"Yeah but...how come?" He steps closer, rests his hand on the small of her back, and she turns back to her locker to gather her books. "I mean, not that I'm complaining or anything."

"Because you're wonderful. And because I wanted to. And because you like cinnamon," she says. He swears (seriously, he'd put money on it) that she _wants_ to drive him absolutely insane. Because she just gave him a pretty fucking good answer. "I know you intend to sweep me off my feet, but to be honest, it's all a little unnecessary, don't you think?"

She closes her locker and he drapes his arm around her shoulder as they start down the hall. "Nah," he says. She looks up at him. "I got big plans for you, Berry. _Big_ plans."

"Should I be scared?"

"You're hilarious," he deadpans. "I mean, I've already gotten you to do this shit in public." He stops, leans back against the wall and pulls her against him. He doesn't care who's looking. His lips are almost touching hers when he says, "just think of what I can get you to do when we're alone."

She lets him kiss her, because she's not really in any position to stop him. (And okay, perhaps also because when he says things like that, she gets this feeling in her stomach that's impossible to ignore, and she thinks that just proves his point anyway.)

"You're a pig," she states, but she's kissing him as she says it, and he laughs. She pulls away and he's smiling like a moron (he knows it). "Where are your books?"

"Oh, yeah. Forgot 'em in my locker."

"Honestly, Noah. How are you passing?" she asks with a laugh. She starts off towards his locker, and he rolls his eyes and follows her.

Being her boyfriend is probably going to do wonders for his grades.

----

Finn slams his locker door closed when he sees Puck and Rachel walking together after lunch. They're not holding hands or anything (though he's already heard through the grapevine about their kisses before classes started for the day) but she's smiling a smile that she never really gave him. He knows it was right for them to break up. Logically, he knows it wasn't working out, no matter how much they wanted it to.

He also knows that she must really like Puck. That doesn't even piss him off. What pisses him off is that he totally fucked up the other day at her house. He said stupid things and acted like a complete jerk, and he doesn't want to lose his best friend. He doesn't want to lose Rachel either. They've got to perform together and go to school together for the next couple years, so he needs to be able to be civil, if not actually _friends_, which is what he really wants.

And yeah, it sucks that she's moving on already (like, it really, really sucks) but it's not really his place to comment on that. If he's being honest, their relationship was probably over before they even broke up.

But still, seeing your ex-girlfriend with someone knew? Well, it sucks.

"Easy, there." He turns towards the voice and sees Quinn standing there, looking almost amused. He rolls his eyes. "You okay?"

"This sucks."

She laughs softly and nods her head. "Yeah."

"You don't..." He looks at her, trying to figure her out. "Puck?"

"What? No!" she cries. "_No_, no, no. No. _No_. Once was enough, thank you."

"So, that's a no, then?" he asks as they start walking towards their Spanish class. She laughs and he gives her a genuine smile.

"Puck and I are friends," she says needlessly. "Which you and Rachel will be."

"I dunno," he mumbles. "I said some things."

"When?"

"Yesterday. I went to her place to drop off her stuff..."

"Oh, fun," Quinn says with a laugh. She remembers vividly when Finn stopped by to give her the last of her things. Not such a good time.

"Yeah, well she was making out with him in his truck," he says bitterly.

Quinn raises her brow. "You mean kinda like you were making out with Jamie Rae VanDerberg?" she asks pointedly. He turns red. "Finn, that was a jackass move. You know that, right?"

"Come on! Can't a guy make out with someone on the rebound without it being a big deal?" he asks in frustration. He glares at Quinn when she starts laughing.

"Sure. Yeah. Go for it. Don't do it in front of your ex. Or _two_ of your exes! God, you're an idiot," she says. It's not mean (well, not completely mean) the way she says it. "Finn, you know they're going to get together, so why does it matter when?"

"Because! We_ just broke up_."

She stops walking and reaches for his arm to pull her against the wall so he can stand in front of her and not be in the way of other students. "Finn, I've talked to Rachel. And I've talked to Puck, who, by the way, is like, crazy about this girl. Like, he has _feelings_. I know how you treated Rachel, and it wasn't really bad, per se, but...Finn, it wasn't great. I mean, you treated me like a _queen_."

"Look where that got me," he mumbles. She glares at him. "Sorry."

"I just think that there's probably a reason why you didn't treat her the same way you treated me," she says.

He just looks at her, his brow furrowed a little bit as he tries to figure out what, exactly, it is that she's saying. He doesn't get it. Why is she comparing the two? Then her eyes kind of lock with his, and they're all soft, like she's waiting for him to clue in.

He doesn't know what's going on.

"I should probably apologize to her," he says. He can tell right away that's not what she was expecting him to say.

"To both of them," she says. He gives her a lopsided grin, because she's always right. Okay, maybe not _always_, but a lot of the time, and definitely right now. "Come on. Mr. Schue will freak if I'm late again. He thinks I'm like, in labour any time I'm 30 seconds after the bell."

Finn reaches out to take her books from her, and she smiles and tucks her hair behind her ear.

He's halfway through class when he figures out what that look she was giving him before meant.

He's pretty sure she's still into him.

He spends the rest of his afternoon wondering how that's possible and what it means.

----

Puck literally pushes Rachel through the door to the choir room. She laughs and swats at his chest, and Finn, Quinn and Brittany are all just looking at them.

Rachel's been dreading this all day. Puck has told her it's no big deal. She has disagreed and was about two fake coughs away from going home for the day. Well, no way in hell was he gonna let her do that and make him suffer through this alone.

"Thanks!" she hisses at him.

"Fucking chill, Berry. This is your like...world, or whatever," he says.

"How eloquent," she mumbles.

He rolls his eyes and walks over to sit down a few chairs away from Finn, and Rachel smiles at the other three people in the room. (Okay, so Puck can admit that the atmosphere is tense, at best.)

"Brittany has to pee!" Quinn says abruptly, standing from her spot. She reaches for her friend's hand and pulls her to her feet. "Come on."

"But...what? How did you know?" Brittany asks. Puck laughs as the girls walk from the room.

Finn doesn't miss the glance Quinn sends him over her shoulder. Sneaky girl.

Rachel sits between the two boys, empty chairs on either side of her separating both of them from her. She doesn't know what Quinn is up to, but she assumes there's a reason she's now sitting in a room alone with her boyfriend and her ex. She hopes that whatever that reason is presents itself soon, before the gossipy gleeks come in and start eavesdropping.

Puck watches Rachel, and if he was more of a jerk he'd sit next to her, drape his arm around her chair, and tell her not to worry about whatever, that everyone else can go fuck themselves. But he knows she'd hate the possessive move, and the bad language, and the vague advice. So he just sits and glances over at her intermittently.

"So, I owe you an apology," Finn says, breaking the silence. "Both of you. I overreacted, and it was stupid of me."

"Thank you, Finn. I appreciate your apology," Rachel says. Puck rolls his eyes, wondering if she'll ever talk like a normal person. Actually, he realizes that she does, a lot of the time, when it's just the two of them alone. Weird. "And I'm sorry, too. I wasn't exactly sensitive to our situation. But Noah and I are going to be together, and I know that's going to be strange for you. For all of us, probably. And I'm sorry for that."

"Yeah, dude," Puck chimes in, moving to sit next to Rachel so he can be part of the conversation. "The timing's shit, but we're doing this."

(Rachel smiles at him, and he's almost getting used to the way his heart races a little.)

"It's cool," Finn says, smiling at his best friend. "I mean, as long as we're...cool."

Rachel doesn't know what the hell that means. Sometimes it's frustrating talking to Finn, because he'll say things like that and she'll have to decode his vernacular.

"We're cool, man," Puck says, reaching over so they can bump fists.

"I'm sorry. What in the world did you two just agree upon?" Rachel asks, looking between the two of them. They're both smiling.

"He doesn't care if we're together, our friendship is still all good, and there're no hard feelings. Fuck, Berry. Keep up," Puck says. Finn laughs when Rachel reaches over and shoves her boyfriend.

"Forgive me for needing a translator when you two have an entire conversation with less than four words!"

"That's because we speak like normal people, and you're always using superfluous language," Puck argues. Finn looks at him in surprise, and Rachel starts laughing.

"Superfluous?" she asks with a grin.

"Whatever. Shut up. Point is, you talk too much." Puck looks at her pointedly and she just shakes her head, resisting the urge (it's difficult) to call him a hypocrite.

Finn just shakes his head, and Rachel smiles at him, because he knows that when you tell Rachel she talks too much, that pretty much gets you the silent treatment, because she feels the need to prove you wrong.

The rest of the group arrives, and Quinn smiles when she sees that clearly, no punches have been thrown and everyone appears to be smiling. Rachel moves to sit with the girls, and she certainly doesn't miss the smile Finn sends Quinn. She doesn't mention it, but Quinn can tell she wants to.

Practice goes off without a hitch, and Rachel doesn't say a word directly to Puck. He thinks it's kind of cute, the way she thinks she can just not speak to him. He remembers Finn saying something about this once, saying how he had to bring up how overrated he thought Titanic was just to get her to say something.

Well, Puck's going to take a different approach.

He really only wants her to say one thing.

His name.

It starts with holding the door to his truck open for her. She smiles at him, but doesn't say thank you. Whatever. He doesn't care, really, because she doesn't have to thank him anyway. Then he reaches for her wrist once he's inside, and he pulls her towards him. She moves to sit right next to him, and she doesn't mention that she's wearing only a lap seat belt instead of a shoulder strap (so much less safe, but she likes being close to him like this). He remembers vividly, that week they dated, her launching into a speech about it, complete with statistics.

He's really surprised when she doesn't say anything about him driving in the direction of his house instead of hers. He rests his hand on her thigh, a little higher than he normally would, and she just rests her hand over his. He knows she's doing it to stop him from moving his hand any higher (he's pretty tempted; she's wearing his favourite skirt). She doesn't even sing along with the radio.

He wonders just how fucking stubborn she really is. Because this? This is a shock to him. He honestly didn't think she had it in her to be quiet so long. Like, he thought it was pretty much physically impossible for her not to be saying shit _all the time_.

He winks at her as he puts the truck in park and hops out, and she doesn't reprimand him for staring at her legs and trying to peek up her skirt as she gets out.

Okay, now she's just freaking him out. He needs to up his game.

He drops his things when he steps into the house, and he watches her calmly take her jacket off and slip off her shoes. He brought her here because his sister has figure skating on Monday nights, so his house is always empty until at least 8:00.

She knows she's in for it when he smirks at her and walks towards her, and before she knows what's happening, the wall is pressed against her back and Noah is pressed against her front. His hips are aligned with hers, his hands resting lightly on her waist, and he licks his lips just subtly before he kisses her.

She's quite literally pinned to the wall, and she can't help the way her arms twine around his waist, or the way she pulls him a little closer. She doesn't know why she does it, really, she just knows that despite the fact that he's pressed against her, she doesn't think he's close enough.

She doesn't say anything when he slides his hand down her side and then across her back to rest on her ass, and she doesn't complain when his other hand slips just underneath the cotton of her shirt at her hip.

(Fuck. She has to say something at _some_ point, right?)

She pushes him away slightly so that she can slip away from him, but she takes one of his hands in hers and leads him to the sofa. She sits down and he leans over her, smiling before he kisses her, and then she's laying on her back and he's laying over her, and he's very aware of the fact that her little skirt doesn't leave much between them when he's laying between her legs. He runs his hand up her thigh, and he moans when she doesn't swat his hand away and his fingertips graze her underwear at her hip.

(Just how far is she willing to let him take this before he inevitably says something to make her stop him?)

It happens when she moves her lips along his jaw and kisses the sensitive skin below his ear. His fingers dig into her skin, and she feels his thumb slip just beneath the elastic at the leg of her panties at her outer thigh. His breath is hot on her neck and he rests a little more weight on her, and it feels so amazing, all of it combined, that she doesn't trust herself.

"Noah," she whispers. She can literally feel his smirk against her neck. He pulls back, but he knows that if he moves off her completely, her skirt is still going to be bunched up around her hips, and he just can't let himself see her that way yet. (Not that he doesn't want to, for the record.)

"I win," he says proudly. She scowls at him, and he laughs softly before he kisses her gently. "Fuck, Rach. That was _hot_."

Her chest is still heaving, and her lids are all heavy. Her cheeks are red and her lips are swollen. He doesn't think she's ever looked sexier.

She loves the way he's looking at her right now, all dark eyes and half a smirk. His hand is still on her thigh (though now, thankfully, closer to her knee). His other arm is bracing him over her, and the muscles of his bicep are even more defined than usual. She definitely had not meant for that to go as far as it did, but when she kisses Noah, it's like nothing, none of it, is enough. She went two months dating Finn without feeling quite what Noah makes her feel in two minutes.

It's crazy.

It's not right.

She _loves_ it.

"Are you okay?" she asks, because as much as she's liking the look in his eye (and the feel of him pressed against her) his gaze has gone from lustful to worried.

"Are you?"

They smile at one another and she nods. "I think so."

"You think so?" he asks, his tone just this side of teasing.

"You make me feel..." She stops talking when the grin stretches across his face.

"What?" He takes his hand off her thigh and brushes her hair back. "What do I make you feel?"

She doesn't know how to word it, and she knows he's expecting a big, long explanation. He's not going to get one. "A lot," she admits quietly. He's still smiling when he kisses her gently. "Noah, are you planning on moving any time soon?"

"Yeah, but...you're wearing this little skirt, and...I mean, if I move..."

She kisses him, pulling him back towards her a little bit. "Look at you," she says fondly. "Your personal growth in the past weeks has been wonderful."

"You saying I can sneak a peek?" he asks, and she rolls her eyes.

"I'm saying, or I _was_ saying, that it's admirable that you've even considered our current...position. Further to that point, you're trying to ensure that I'm comfortable," she says. He sighs, but she thinks he's listened to every word. "It's very sweet."

"Whatever."

She laughs and shakes her head, and he does his best not to groan when her body shifts beneath his. She's just given him this speech about how considerate he's being, and arching into her like he's fucking _dying_ to do would probably not be the greatest idea.

"So, how are we..."

"I'm going to close my eyes and you're going to get off the couch," he says.

God, this is painful. He _wants_ to look. He wants her naked, actually, but he knows she's not ready for that. Not even close. Well, maybe close. It doesn't really matter. That's not why he's with her, which is kind of weird in itself, but it's something he's come to accept. Rachel is a hell of a lot more (better) than just some girl to sleep with, and so he's going to treat her like she deserves to be treated.

Fuck. He's going soft.

(And he wonders if she means to brush up against him as she slips out from underneath him. She's biting her lip and looking at him apologetically when he opens his eyes, so he figures it wasn't intentional.)

Once he's sitting on the sofa with one arm draped over the back, he fully expects her to sit down next to him so they can...do whatever it is that couples do. He doesn't really know. He wants her to teach him.

But then she runs towards the stairs, he doesn't know what the hell's going on in her head. (Most people wouldn't bother trying to figure it out). "Where're you going?"

She doesn't answer. He can hear her little footsteps over his head as she walks around upstairs, and then when she comes back down, she's holding his guitar. She hands it to him before she sits down.

"You promised me a song," she reminds him.

He's really glad he actually learned that song and wasn't just feeding her a line.

(What? He really, really likes cinnamon, and he really, really likes it when his girl tastes like cinnamon.)

----

So he doesn't know how it happens, but he messes up his mom's schedule, and one day when he has Rachel over, his mom walks straight into the living room.

The only saving grace is that Puck's hand isn't, you know, up Rachel's skirt (she doesn't really let him do that too often anyway, and she definitely doesn't let him touch her anywhere higher than her leg, but whatever) and they both have their shirts on. They're actually doing homework. (Oh, good. Another reason for his mom to freak out about this girl...)

But his mom has like, Jew-Dar or something (okay, that and she just recognizes Rachel) because she lights up like a damn Christmas tree and hugs Rachel so hard that Puck thinks his girlfriend's eyes are going to pop out of her head.

Granted, it's been a few weeks, and his mom knows all about their relationship, and Rachel has been all but begging to meet his mom, but he's been putting it off. Two crazy Jewish chicks in one house (three if his sister were there) and he's like, _this close_ to punching himself in the face.

"Jeez mom, calm down," Puck says. She's got her hands on Rachel's shoulders and she's just kind of looking at her, which is probably pretty creepy for Rachel, but she's just smiling and she doesn't look too worried. "What're you doing home?"

"I only worked until 4:00 today. And you, young man, would be getting a lecture about having girls alone in the house if it weren't for the fact that Rachel is _obviously_ not the kind of girl to let you defile my home."

"Defile, mom? Christ," Puck groans. He notices Rachel's a cute shade of pink, and he wonders if she too is thinking of the day before when they both ended up on his bed, totally shirtless as they listened to an R&B mix CD she gave him.

"You're staying for dinner, aren't you?" Puck watches as his mom takes Rachel's hand and starts pulling her towards the kitchen.

"Oh, Mrs. Puckerman, I don't..."

"It's Aviva, dear, and you can call me Avi." Puck rolls his eyes. "And I'm not taking no for an answer."

"Well, in that case, let me know what I can do to help," Rachel says. She tosses Puck a smile over her shoulder and he tips his head back and stifles a groan.

So much for making out for a couple hours. Now he's gotta listen to his mom go on and on about Rachel and how beautiful she is (which, yeah, he agrees with) and how talented she is (fine, also true) and how good she is for him (okay, not exactly a stretch).

But if he hears one fucking word about eventual marriage and/or Jewish grandchildren, he's going to _lose_ _his_ _shit_.

And okay, it ends up not being as bad as he thought it'd be. He's seriously been dreading this. His mom is crazy and his girlfriend is crazy, and that's just _a lot_ of crazy to have to deal with. But his mom is shockingly normal, and Rachel is amazing (no surprise there, really). She takes his hand over top of the table and he literally sees the tears in his moms eyes.

And you know what? It doesn't suck, making his mom happy. Especially not when the thing that makes her happy happens to make him pretty damn happy too. (Shut up about it, okay? Because whatever. If you had a girl like Rachel, you'd be happy too.)

His mom kisses Rachel's cheeks before Puck walks her to the door, and she's laughing as she tugs on her jacket.

"Your mom is amazing," Rachel says, and he rolls his eyes.

"She's fucking nuts."

"She's lovely, and you know it," she says as she steps closer. "I think she likes me."

"I think she'd have the wedding tomorrow," he mumbles. Rachel raises her brow. "Not that...you know....that'd happen, since we're like, kids and stuff, but..."

"Noah?" she says, smirking as she interrupts him.

"Yeah?"

"I'll see you tomorrow."

She kisses him and smiles before she steps out of the house, and he waits until she's in her car and on the street before he shuts the door.

He loves that she stops him from talking before he makes a complete ass of himself.

(When he walks back into the kitchen, his mom says, in all seriousness, "If she's not the one for you, Noah, no one is," and he'd tell her to back off if he didn't kind of almost think the same thing.)

----

Rachel's sitting on the bleachers in the gym one day, watching the basketball team practice. She's got her hands tucked beneath her legs and her knees pressed together as she sits there and watches her boyfriend run up and down the court. She smiles when Noah passes to Matt, who shoots the ball through the net.

They've been together, officially, for almost a month. The whole school knows, since Noah isn't exactly discrete about anything. He isn't much for hand holding (not in public, but he does it when they're driving, and sometimes when they're sitting together on the sofa) but he drapes his arm around her shoulders or her waist in the halls when he walks her to class. He's told her, because she asked why he's so willing to show off their relationship, that she's his girl, and she's hot, and everyone should know that. She didn't know how to respond to that, so she just kissed him, and that seemed to be good enough.

And, true to his word, he's been 'wooing her'. He refuses to call it anything else, though she thinks that he's just being a goof. It's completely ridiculous, because she does not need for him to win her over. He already has her, and when she tells him that, he smiles and wiggles his eyebrows, and she can only roll her eyes at him.

First, there was the song (which is now one of her top played on iTunes). Then he stuck a red Titans sticker on the inside of her locker and wrote his jersey number on it with a Sharpie, which she actually thinks is really sweet and kind of hot. He took her out on an actual first date, with a meal and a movie and everything (and he didn't complain once; especially not when she reached over and took his hand about 20 minutes into the film). There was the whole dinner with his mom. He changed the oil in her car for her, though she doesn't know if that was part of his plan, or if he just likes messing around with cars and stuff. He brought her a pink carnation one day for no reason (though he admitted that he just stole it from a bouquet his mom bought, Rachel still thinks the gesture was sweet).

And he's been totally, completely sweet and patient with her if things get a little too heated and she pushes him away. Not that she really expected any different, but it's always a little scary when she's saying no and it's very clear that he doesn't want to stop. But he's promised it's fine and that she shouldn't worry about it, that he can wait and he's not going to rush her.

So naturally, she's totally falling for him.

And her pulse races when she pulls his shirt off so the guys can play shirts vs. skins.

"This is the best part of the whole practice." The voice startles Rachel, but then she turns to see Quinn sitting next to her, hand on her stomach as she leans back on one elbow.

"Hi Quinn," Rachel says sweetly. "What are you still doing here?"

"Finn's giving me a ride home. I've been working late after school, getting ahead in my classes so I don't miss much when..." She looks at her stomach and takes a breath. "When it happens."

Rachel has noticed, in recent weeks, that there's an air of sadness around Quinn when she talks about the baby. Rachel knows, because Noah has the same reaction. They've picked a couple in Akron to adopt, and that was the only day when Noah pulled away from Rachel a little bit. And she was understanding and supportive and told him to let her know if he needed anything, then gave him his space. He ended up apologizing the next day, and she just smiled and kissed him and told him not to worry about it, but reminded him that he doesn't have to deal with things on his own anymore.

"That's very responsible," Rachel says, and the girls smile at one another.

They're quiet for a minute, but Rachel doesn't miss the way Quinn's eyes linger on Finn's body. And he's on the shirts team. She thinks back on the last few months, how Finn and Quinn stayed friends and Finn confided things in her that he didn't (wouldn't, or maybe couldn't) confide in Rachel. And now this gaze, one she's familiar with (because hello, have you _seen_ her boyfriend?) is leading her to believe that perhaps there are lingering feelings.

"Quinn, may I ask you a question? You have every right not to answer."

Quinn laughs and nods her head. "Sure."

"Are you still in love with Finn?" She turns to the blonde, whose eyes are now wide with surprise. "I only ask because I'm a fairly good judge of personal energy, I mean, after all, I was the one who figured out the whole baby secret without anyone telling me. And while I have admittedly been a little blind to my own situations, which, for the record, I'm not proud of, I..."

"Oh, my god. Stop talking," Quinn says, but it's not really mean. She's kind of laughing, definitely smiling, and she sits up as much as she can. "Can you keep a secret?" she asks. Rachel bites her lip. (No, she usually can't.) "I think I am."

Rachel's face lights up a little too much, considering they're talking about her ex. "Really?" Quinn nods and Rachel almost squeals. "This is perfect!"

"Perfect?" Quinn asks doubtfully. "I'm having a baby. I'm having his best friend's baby. I'm having _your boyfriend's_ baby." Rachel rolls her eyes. Honestly, all that feels like water under the bridge. "But maybe....maybe after, you know? When I'm not fat and hormonal and pathetic."

Rachel turns to her friend (she's not entirely certain when she and Quinn became friends; it just kind of happened). "Quinn, you are not _fat_, you're pregnant. And you're beautiful, by the way, but I'm sure I don't need to tell you that. And you're _not_ pathetic."

Quinn smiles and shakes her head. "You're like, the nicest person I know, Rachel."

Rachel smiles and she's about to say thank you, but a voice cuts through the gym.

"_Schooled_ your ass, Hudson! You got nothing, man."

Both girls look over to see Puck totally trash talking Finn. Puck's standing there, knees bent as he tries to defend against Finn. But basketball is totally Finn's game, so he just laughs and shakes his head before moving around Puck towards the net.

"You know, you two are pretty much the strangest couple ever," Quinn says with a laugh. "You're so sweet and nice, and he's..._Puck_."

"Trust me, he can be sweet," Rachel says, watching as he steals the ball from Finn and runs down the court, sinking a lay up. Quinn smiles but doesn't say anything. "Can you keep a secret?"

"Um. Have you forgotten fall semester?" Quinn asks, laughing at the screwed up situation that feels like it happened ages and ages ago.

"I think I'm falling for him," Rachel confesses. Quinn doesn't think she's ever heard Rachel say anything so quietly.

"Sweetie," Quinn says, linking her arm through Rachel's, "Puck is like, totally in love with you."

"He told you that?" Rachel asks in surprise. Her heart absolutely pounds in her chest.

"No." Quinn shakes her head and smiles. The coach blows the whistle and the guys wander to the sidelines for sips of water and to gather their things. "I can tell."

Rachel just smiles and watches as Noah crosses the gym floor towards her. "Apparently you've got my sixth sense, too," she says, and both girls laugh.

"What're you two talking about?" Puck asks, pulling his shirt over his head. (Rachel tries not to be disappointed.) "And don't say nothing, Rach, because I know that smile."

Her heart melts. He knows her smiles. But she doesn't know how to answer.

"Rachel was just telling me that she can't wait to get you alone so she can do more fun things than basketball when you're not wearing a shirt," Quinn says. She gets up as Rachel's jaw drops and Puck raises his brow. "Later!"

"I didn't say that!" Rachel cries. Her cheeks are so red, she can tell, and Quinn is laughing as she walks towards Finn. "Noah, I _didn't_ say that. She made it up."

He reaches for her hand so he can pull her up, and then she's standing on the step in front of him, so they're the same height. He pulls her against him, not caring that he's sweaty. "Too bad," he growls, leaning in to kiss her. "Then what were you talking about?"

"Nothing," she insists. Her arms are around his neck. Though she'd really rather not get her clothing covered in his sweat, she can't help herself. "My dads are working late. Come over?"

He doesn't say anything, just nods, and she kisses his cheek before she pulls away and skips down off the bleachers and towards the gym doors. He follows her, pushing the door open and holding it so she can walk through. When she passes him, she looks into his eyes, and it seriously turns him on (she's so hot it makes him fucking crazy.)

"Maybe Quinn wasn't really lying about that shirt thing," she says softly.

He groans and follows her laughter out of the gym. (But he's not going to complain, because he knows that he gets to take her shirt off, too.)


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N:** Here is the last chapter. Thank you all so much for reading and giving feedback! I've got more PR stories coming...

**----**

It's selfish and horrible and totally, completely wrong to think it, but when Quinn calls him and tells him she's in labour and on her way to the hospital, he thinks she's set out to ruin his life.

It's a slight overreaction, because he's currently laying atop a half-naked Rachel, and she's just told him that she's ready.

Like, _ready_, ready.

And his phone rings, and it's the ringtone he has for Quinn, which Rachel insisted he make different from the rest (her own is Cinnamon Girl, which he set himself) so that if Quinn called and needed him, he'd know and not just ignore his phone.

He knows he has to take it, they both know that. It's just that it's March break, and Rachel's dads are away and the room is glowing with candles, and it's so, so _perfect_. He's been waiting for this for what feels like forever.

So _of course_, something is going to interrupt. Something huge that he really can't really complain about. Rachel overhears the whole conversation, complete with Quinn's cry of pain, and she has to push Noah off her, because he's frozen in place. (Talk about effective birth control.)

She starts putting clothes on, and he's just sitting there at the edge of her bed until she throws his shirt at him and shouts his name.

"Noah! Quinn is _having the baby_!" she says needlessly. He pulls his shirt over his head and stands up as she blows out candles and turns off her music. "Come on."

"Rachel, can you..." He sighs and reaches for her arm to stop her from rushing out of the room. He hasn't planned for this precise moment. He never thought he'd be with Rachel when he got this call. (Which might be stupid, now that he thinks about it, because they're together most of the time.) "I don't want you to come."

She can feel her throat tightening, and she hopes she can keep the tears out of her eyes. She knows this isn't about her. She just wishes that he wouldn't push her away any time he comes up against something that forces his emotions. He doesn't understand that having a girlfriend means that he doesn't have to go through everything alone.

"Oh."

"Rach, I just can't...I can't deal with you, and her, and...fuck. I don't know what the fuck I'm doing, and I'm freaking out here," he says honestly. "I can't handle you looking at me the way you're looking at me right now."

She takes a breath and straightens her posture. As much as it kills her, she'll give him what he needs. "Go, then."

"Rachel..."

"Go, Noah," she insists. "Drive _safely_. Please. And call me when you have news."

He smiles, and she thinks she might see something shimmering in his eyes just before he kisses her. God, she's just the most amazing girl in the world, even when he's a total fuck up with no clue what to do. Knowing she's there when he needs her is comforting. It makes him wonder why he never did this relationship thing before, but he knows that no other girl would be as good at it as she is. They're both smiling a little bit when they part, and he squeezes her hand before letting it go.

"I love you," he says quickly, right before he jogs out of her room.

It takes her a second to register the words (they've never said them before) and she doesn't get a chance to say them back.

He's in his truck before he realizes what he just told her, and he is just _such_ a fuck up! It's not like he doesn't mean it. Of course he does. He's been in love with her since before they even started dating (pathetic as that is). And it's not even that he didn't plan on saying it tonight. What better night to tell your girl you love her than after you make love to her for the first time? (Not before, so she wouldn't think he didn't mean it.)

But telling her he can't deal with her (also the truth, right this second) and then blurting it out in passing was definitely not the way he saw it going. It's a big, huge deal, and he's got even bigger things to think about.

He sits in his truck for a few minutes before he gets out, because he just needs a second alone to think. He has no idea what to expect from all this, how Quinn's going to act around him and how long he's going to get with his daughter before her real parents come take her away.

When he gets to the maternity ward, he's more than a little surprised to see Finn sitting anxiously in the waiting room. Terri Schuester is there, sitting by the window and biting her thumbnail anxiously, but Puck doesn't really give a shit about her, because she's all kinds of crazy.

"Hey, man," Finn says when he sees Puck. "I just got here. She called me and I figured, you know, crazy, crying pregnant girl on the phone, I should probably do what she tells me."

As thick as Finn can be sometimes, Puck thinks that's probably the smartest thing the guy has ever said. And fuck it. He reaches out and they hug quickly, because if there's ever a day to hug your best friend, it's probably this one.

He takes a deep breath, and Finn smiles and pats Puck's shoulder as he heads in the direction of Quinn's room.

Somewhere between hours one and four, he calls Rachel and tells her he needs her.

And he _does_. He was a moron for thinking otherwise.

Quinn's a mess, and he can't blame her. She switches between crying and bitching and being eerily quiet. He doesn't know what to do, so after a while, he tells her, very bluntly, that if she wants anything, she's just going to have to tell him flat out, because he's not a fucking mind reader, and he's never done this before. She actually laughs, and he thinks that maybe the two of them can get through this.

And then the doctor tells them they have about 10 hours to go, and he thinks that he'll kill her if she bitches at him about 'doing this' to her one more time. (Seriously? All this isn't _solely_ his fault, but, you know, he values his life and his balls, so he keeps his mouth shut and doesn't mention that fact.) He slips out of the room and Finn stands, and Puck tells him to head in and keep the crazy bitch company for a minute. He doesn't mean it, and they both know it, and before the door is even closed, he's got Rachel's number dialed.

It's two in the morning, and she tells him she'll be over as soon as possible, and is there anything she can bring him? God, he loves this girl. He mentions that he's a little hungry, and that Finn's also there, and she says that she'll take care of it.

He feels better already.

It's not like she hasn't spent the last four hours thinking about him, smiling like an idiot and replaying that little kiss and those three words over and over and over again. Their night definitely hasn't gone as planned, to say the least, but she doesn't think there's any better feeling than the feeling she had just after he said those words.

Honestly, she never, ever, in a million years, expected that he'd be the first one to say them. He's the one who still makes lewd comments when she even starts a sentence with_ 'I feel'. _And even if it was just that his emotions were running high and he didn't necessarily mean to tell her, she reasons that doesn't exactly mean that he doesn't feel that way.

He _loves_ her. She loves him.

And she's so thrilled that he's called her so quickly and admitted that he wants her around him right now.

She walks into the maternity ward waiting room, and he and Finn are both sitting there with their heads in their hands. Mrs. Schuester (or whatever she's going by right now) is asleep in a chair near the window. Rachel walks over and sets the bag of food, drinks and snacks onto the chair next to Finn before taking Noah's face in her hands and kissing his forehead.

"Thanks for coming, baby," he says quietly, not even caring that Finn is sitting right there.

"Is everything okay? What's going on?" she asks, kneeling in front of him. He notices she's wearing a pair of those yoga pants that make him crazy, and a hoodie over a black tank top. Her hair is in a loose ponytail. She looks beautiful, and he doesn't care if it's a weird moment to recognize it.

"This is like, the slowest fucking labour ever," Noah grumbles. He glares when she laughs.

"My birth mother was 36 hours with me," Rachel says. Finn chokes on the sandwich he's eating, and Noah looks at her blankly. "Quinn is young and fit and ready for this. It shouldn't take that long."

"They're checking on her right now," Finn explains. "Thanks for the food."

"You're welcome," she says, smiling at him. She stands up and glances down at Noah, who's now got his head tipped back as he looks at the ceiling. "Do you mind if I go see her?"

"Go for it. She's being a bitch," Noah says. She gasps and drops his hand. "What?! She _is_!"

"She's having a child, Noah. You don't know what that's like. Neither do I. Cut her some slack. She deserves just a little patience right now," Rachel says sternly. He rolls his eyes, but she notices he's smiling.

"Go ahead," Noah says. "I need a break, and Finn's...devouring a sandwich."

"Really good," Finn says appreciatively, his mouth full.

Rachel laughs, then kisses Noah quickly before heading down the hall. He watches her go, and for what feels like the millionth time, he wonders what the hell he's done in his life to deserve her. He asked her out loud once. The look she gave him was terrifying.

That's the thing, though, isn't it? She honestly thinks he's the sweetest, best boyfriend in the world. It's fucked. He tries not to question it too much.

"Dude, this's messed up," Finn says after swallowing another bite. Puck narrows his eyes questioningly. "You and Rach. Me and Quinn, sorta, whatever. Me and you. Quinn and Rach, you and Quinn, me and..."

"I get it, dude," Puck says, rubbing his temples.

He gets it. It's fucked. And most of it is his fault. But none of them are holding it against him. Well, maybe Quinn is this very second, and he can't really fucking blame her for that. (He's seen the birthing videos. It's almost enough to turn a guy off that whole area forever. _Almost_...)

Finn hands him a sandwich, and they sip Gatorade. (Rachel's always talking about the importance of electrolytes and stuff, as if he hasn't been playing sports his whole life. He lets her talk because he thinks it's cute now, the way she goes on and on.) There's a little package of Oreos (Finn's favourite) and a package of Twinkies (Puck's favourite). Most thoughtful girl ever.

Puck reluctantly stands after he's done eating, because he figures he should go save Rachel before Quinn like, scares her half to death or scratches out her eyes.

He's surprised as hell when he walks into the room and the girls are laughing. _Laughing!_ Rachel is french braiding Quinn's hair into two neat pigtails (seriously, _braiding her hair_) and Quinn looks comfortable for the first time since Puck got to the hospital.

He never should have doubted it, but Rachel Berry? She's a fucking _champ_ in a crisis.

"How's it going?" he asks warily, because he's afraid that any minute, one or both of these girls is going to snap at him and remind him that he's the one who's brought them all here in the first place. "You okay?"

"I am," Quinn says, smiling at him. "Rachel is amazing, you know?"

He laughs and smiles at Rachel, who's blushing as she slips an elastic off her wrist to hold Quinn's braid in place. "I know," he says quietly.

"I was thinking..." Quinn stops talking and winces, hand coming to rest on her stomach. "Oh. Oh, ow!"

Rachel takes the blonde's hand and demonstrates the breathing Quinn should be doing, and Puck stands there, watching as Rachel takes more control of the situation than he's had all night. He's not surprised, really. If he didn't know that her middle name is Sophia, he'd think it was Control.

After a while, another nurse comes in to check on Quinn, and Rachel asks if it would be alright if Finn joined them. The nurse, a sweet woman of about 35 with little ABCs on her scrubs, smiles and says that would be just fine, so long as Quinn stays as calm as possible.

Finn walks into the room, and Rachel actually laughs when the blonde's blood pressure decreases just a little bit. Staying calm won't be a problem.

They sit, the four of them, in that room for a long time. They take turns holding Quinn's hand (except for Finn, who sits on her left side and holds her hand the entire time) through each contraction. Puck and Rachel are on one side of the bed, and she rubs his arm soothingly when she can see that he's feeling uneasy.

Sometime around 9:00 am, Quinn is sweating and exhausted, and her OB-GYN comes in and announces that it's time, that her contractions are close together and she's dilated (Puck thinks that's a really gross word, actually) and it's time to start pushing.

Quinn starts crying when the doctor asks everyone but the father to leave the room. Rachel tries to sooth her, saying she and Finn will be right outside, but Quinn's having none of it.

"Listen!" Quinn shouts, locking eyes with her doctor. "I am _seventeen_, and I have no family. These people are what I have. They are staying, or_ so help me God_, I will make this whole experience more painful for you than it's going to be for me!"

Puck has never seen an adult look quite so terrified.

So Rachel and Finn stay.

It doesn't take long after that. An hour and a half, and then there's a baby girl crying in the room and Quinn's laying back against the pillows. Rachel's tearing up, and Finn is holding her hand from where they're standing, out of the way of the doctor and nurses. Puck is sitting there, looking between Quinn and his baby, and he doesn't give a fuck if he's got tears in his eyes, because this is _crazy_.

They place the baby, wrapped up in a flannel blanket, in Quinn's arms, and Puck watches as she talks to the little girl as though the baby will understand. She's crying, and the baby is calm and cooing, blinking lazily like babies do. Quinn's eyes lock with Puck's, and she actually smiles at him, then pushes the baby towards him. He knows how to hold a baby, since he's got a little sister and cousins and stuff, but this is _way_ different.

This baby is his, and she's only a couple minutes old. She's red and splotchy and her fine hair is matted to her head.

She's beautiful.

He feels a hand on his back, and when he turns, he's looking straight into Rachel's eyes. She's crying, too, and he _loves her_ for that.

They take turns holding the little girl, then her adoptive parents come into the room, and everyone's crying, and Quinn hands her baby to her new parents. Puck watches as the guy who's just barely 10 years older than him holds this little girl, his (their?) little girl, and he can't just stand here and watch this.

He really, really wants to be alone, to get pissed and hit something and probably cry some more and act like...not this, not calm. But Rachel's hand is in his, her thumb stroking his intermittently, and so when he walks from the room, he pulls her along with him.

They find a quiet hallway, and the first thing she does is wrap her arms around his waist and rest her head against his chest, and he folds her into this big hug, because he needs her, and he has her, and she's there for him without him even having to ask. He doesn't know how to thank her for any of that, so he doesn't try.

"Tell me I'm doing the right thing," he says quietly. He hears her sniffle a little bit, then pull away, and he knows she notices the tears in his eyes, but she doesn't say anything. "Just...tell me she'll be better off with them."

"Noah," Rachel says, her voice hoarse, "you're giving her a chance at a life that you can't provide her. This is the _best_ thing for her."

His throat gets tight and he looks down, only to see her hands clutching the front of his shirt at his stomach. "I love her," he admits. "And...dammit, I _want_ to be a dad."

"You _will _be," Rachel insists. "When the time is right, you will be. And you'll be _amazing_."

He shakes his head, not because he doesn't believe her, but because she believes herself. She says the words with such confidence, like it's all just fact. "Thank you," he mumbles into her hair as he hugs her again.

She pulls away again, leans up to kiss him quickly, and he wipes the tears from her cheeks. "I love you, too," she says, smiling at him. It makes him laugh a little bit and rest his forehead against hers.

He doesn't say anything, because she knows how he feels. He loves that she's not questioning it, asking him if he meant it.

They stay at the hospital for the rest of the day, the six of them (Puck, Rachel, Quinn, Finn and the baby - Eva's - adoptive parents) in Quinn's room, fawning over the baby. Puck watches as Rachel holds his little girl.

And all he can think is that she looks really good with a baby in her arms.

----

When it finally happens, when they finally sleep together, it's not planned. There are no candles, or flowers, or perfect playlist. She's not wearing matching underthings, and her hair is a mess from the hat she's been wearing. The bottoms of her pants are wet, and her cheeks are red from the cold.

It's a snow day, a freak April storm blew through their town the night before and covered everything in white. She tells him to come over and waits for him on the front step. When he gets out of his truck, he's wearing a scarf (he's never worn one before, and she thinks he looks cute) and has his hands stuck in his pockets.

His jaw drops when she throws a snowball that hits him in the shoulder, and when he shakes his head and scowls, she squeals and stands up. He runs towards her and catches her around the waist and spins her around, and he thinks she looks really, really adorable with snowflakes sticking to the ends of her hair and laughter in her throat.

They mess around outside for a while, until he tells her, ever so eloquently, that he's freezing his nuts off and needs to get inside.

She's making them hot cocoa, standing there in her jeans and one of his sweatshirts. She looks so sexy that he can't help himself, and he walks up behind her and wraps his arms around her, telling her so.

She turns in his arms, and drapes her arms over his shoulders, pulling him into a kiss.

They're alone, and she's got this look in her eyes that's making him feel..._a lot_. He reaches over and shuts off the stove, never breaking eye contact, and then kisses her again and starts walking them towards the stairs.

She doesn't get nervous, not even when he lays her down on her bed and pulls the sweatshirt from her body. There's no uncertainty in her eyes when he runs his hands over her bare skin, and she almost begs him when he asks her if she's sure. All he can do is smile in response. _This_ has never felt_ like this_ for him before.

It surprises her that she's not scared. He's always been delicate with her, sweet and understanding, but this is different. She grows impatient with him, this time, and it makes him smile at her.

She learns very quickly why people call it making love. She's never felt _anything_ more amazing.

And she tells him after that she now understands why he loves sex so much.

(_Try_ to tell him he doesn't have the best girlfriend ever. Just try.)

----

They break up.

For exactly 6 hours and 22 minutes, and it fucking _sucks_.

It's totally not his fault, and it's not really Rachel's fault, either, which makes the whole situation even worse, because the only person he can blame is a fucking stupid bitch whose name he doesn't even know.

And okay, he can understand why Rachel's pissed. She thinks she saw something that she didn't see. But you know what? She talks and talks and talks, and he doesn't get a word in, and when he tries to explain, she doesn't fucking listen, which, frankly, pisses him off.

He's sitting in his truck, driving around and going absolutely nowhere, because the only place he wants to go (her house) is off limits. Or so he assumes, judging by the way she she shouted at him, _'don't even _think_ of coming to my house!'_ She's talked a lot of shit in the last couple hours, but he's pretty sure that's one thing she actually meant.

He didn't even want to go to the party. Why the hell would he want to go to a lame house party in a shady neighbourhood and hang out with stupid kids who can't hold their alcohol? Why would he want to do that when he could just hang out with his girl? (Yeah, he's the kind of guy who'd rather sit on the couch at her place while her dads talk in the next room, rather than go to a stupid party. Whatever.)

But Rachel thought it was rude if they didn't go, since it was one of his teammates who was throwing the party, and Puck didn't go to the last two parties thrown by his friends. Honestly? He doesn't care. What's another party? The same shit always happens.

He and Rachel have been together for months. School's out now, and he's cleaning pools and playing baseball, and Rachel's babysitting and doing all sorts of crazy performance stuff, like dance and voice lessons. She goes to all his games wearing a baseball jersey with his name and number on the back, and he goes to her recitals and gives her flowers when they're alone after.

It's never been a secret that they're together. They're together all the time. Everyone knows.

So why that girl came up to him at the party and started talking like she was trying to seduce him, he honestly has no fucking clue. He was clearly not interested, reminding her that he has a girlfriend, but she just wouldn't fuck off. He tried to push her away (literally), his hand on her shoulder, but she leaned forward and kissed him.

And of course, that was the exact moment Rachel walked into the room. To her, it just looked like her boyfriend had his hand on another girl and was kissing said girl. Apparently, she didn't notice that his eyes were open in shock (and anger) and he pushed the chick away immediately.

The real reason he's pissed? When he tried to explain to Rachel, she implied that the only reason he stopped the kiss was because Rachel walked into the room. Which is a pretty shitty thing to say, if you ask him.

Well, that was 11:00, and now it's 2:30, and he doesn't know what the fuck to do, because the last thing she said to him was "We're through," and if this is what heartbreak feels like, it's the worst thing in the world. He knows he needs to get her back. He doesn't know how.

Rachel's laying on her side on her bed, curled up into a ball with tears on her cheeks. Why does her life have to be so difficult? Why can't things just continue going well? She's been having the best summer with Noah. They've gotten to an amazing place in their relationship, where he doesn't hide his emotions and she feels calm around him, changing for the better and thinking more about other people where she used to just think about herself.

They have the kind of relationship where she doesn't get offended if he points out that a stranger is attractive. It doesn't bother her, because at the end of the day, he'll tell her he loves her and that he thinks she's the sexiest girl he knows. (He's slightly less understanding when she points out an attractive guy. His response is usually a scoff, and a _"Please. Have you fucking _seen_ me?"_ and she'll just laugh and kiss his cheek, because, okay, he has a point.)

Seeing him with that other girl just made all her old insecurities return. She knows she's an attractive girl. That's not her being conceited, it's just a fact. (And she's had someone telling her almost every day for the last five months.) But that girl was everything Rachel isn't. Tall and blonde, big breasts and low rise jeans with her shirt baring her midriff.

Seeing Noah kissing that girl made her question everything, and his explanation was laden with curses, and he didn't have a very likely story, if you ask her.

The fact that he called her a crazy bitch? That was the last straw. He didn't say it like he usually does. There was no teasing tone, no smile on his face or shake of his head. He said it like he meant it, and it broke her heart.

She hadn't really meant to tell him that they're through, she still doesn't know if she means it, even if it turns out that he did kiss that other girl willingly.

She doesn't know how things went from so amazing to so terrible, all in a matter of minutes.

She's thankful that Tina was able to drive her home, because there was no way she was going anywhere with Noah.

He hasn't tried to call her in an hour. She cries a little harder when she starts thinking that maybe this is the end.

It hurts her heart to think about what he could be doing right now, and with who.

Little does she know that he's just driving around aimlessly, trying to figure out how to get them back on track. This whole night has been such a shitstorm. Honestly, he doesn't know how this even happened. Once in five months, a girl doesn't take no for an answer, and he ends up dumped on the front lawn of a shitty little house at the edge of town. (Okay, he can admit that he should _not_ have called her a crazy bitch. He definitely crossed a line with that.)

And he thinks that for a girl who loves to talk so much, she's been like, weirdly refusing to have a conversation. He eventually stops calling, because he gets a little more pissed every time she doesn't answer.

And you know what? He thinks that he's not going to let her get away with giving up on them so easily, not after everything. He's gonna make her listen to him, even if it takes a PA system and a piece of duct tape over her damn mouth.

So when he pulls up at her house at 4:00 in the morning, he gets out of his truck with a kind of determination that he probably has no business possessing right now. Her bedroom light is on, and her dad's car is in the driveway, and fuck, she's not going to turn him into the kind of guy who throws pebbles at her window and shit. He observes the house for a moment. There's nothing secure enough to climb up (and does he really want to be _that_ guy?) He could just knock and wake up her whole family, because this seems pretty fucking important, actually, but then he runs the risk of her saying she doesn't want to see him and her dads telling him to leave, and he respects them and their home enough that he'd do as they asked.

So he's going old school.

Don't ask him how he knows so much about picking locks. Just don't. It's a whole big thing, and he's not proud of it. But yeah, he's got a little device in his glove box (he just never threw it away) that he inserts into the lock, and with a few jiggles, he feels the mechanism click, and he feels like _such_ a dick for doing this. But that's on one hand. On the other hand, he's happy they don't have an alarm system, because when he walks inside (and yeah, he locks the door behind him) he heads quietly towards the stairs undetected.

She's got her back to the door, but she turns quickly and sits up when she hears someone push it open.

And the only time in his life that he's ever felt worse than he feels right now was when he heard those two harsh words from her mouth hours earlier. There are tears on her cheeks, her face free of makeup, and it's clear she hasn't gone to sleep. She's just been here crying. It's _heartbreaking_.

"How'd you get in?" she asks quietly. Her voice is all hoarse, and she raises her hand to her throat. He notices a bottle of water on her desk, and he hands it to her.

"Don't ask," he says, and it's like a warning. She sighs and lays down on her side again, her back to him. "Will you listen to me?"

"I've heard what you had to say."

"No, you didn't. You didn't listen, Rachel," he tells her. He knows he's right, whether she wants to admit it or not.

"You know," she says, rolling onto her back, "I never really think about your reputation before us. I don't consider who you used to be, because that's not who you are when you're with me."

"I know," he says urgently. "Exactly."

"But then, tonight, I was reminded that...people don't really change, do they? At the core, they're still the way they've always been, no matter how much they may fool you." She doesn't wipe the tears that fall from her eyes.

"So, what?" he asks, his brow furrowed. "You're saying you expected this of me?"

She shakes her head. "I'm saying I should have."

He scoffs and looks away from her. "That a _really_ shitty thing to say, you know that?"

"You kissed another girl."

"_She_ kissed _me_! And I stopped it! I told her I have a girlfriend," he says, not bothering to use the word 'had' instead, because fuck that. He loves her, even when, like now, she's hell bent on ripping his heart out of his chest. "What happened to trusting me? The benefit of the doubt or whatever?"

"What happened to me being enough for you?" she asks in a small voice, finally reaching up to wipe her eyes. "I can't..."

"You _are_ enough for me," he says seriously. God, he just wants to touch her, to reach out and rest his hand on her stomach or _something_.

"Noah, you're twice her size. You're athletic and muscular, and if you really didn't want her around you, you could have done something about it. Maybe you told her that you had a girlfriend, but clearly that wasn't enough. You could have pushed her away. You could have forced her to leave you alone. Instead, you just stood there, letting her talk to you and bat her lashes, and..." She stops to compose herself, take a deep breath. She can't look him in the eye, for fear of what she might see and what it'll do to her. "You made a fool of me."

"I did push her away! You _dumped me_ in front of a dozen people," he counters. He actually feels like he has a point.

And he's still reeling from her saying she should have expected this of him. Does she seriously think of him like that?

"You called me a bitch."

He winces. Her voice is almost a whisper, and he fucking hates himself. He reaches out and rests his hand on her upper arm, and he's more than a little surprised when she doesn't pull it away.

"I'm _so_ sorry about that," he says. She can tell he's being sincere. "Rachel, this is..." (_Do _not_ use the word crazy, you idiot!_) "This isn't right. I didn't do anything wrong. This is all just fucking...out of hand."

"Are you saying this is my fault?" she asks, sitting up to face him. It's then that he notices that she's wearing one of his tee shirts.

"No!" he answers quickly. "No, it's not your fault. It's...fuck, it's probably mine, somehow, but...I don't want anyone else, Rachel. Don't you know that by now? I just want you." She's biting the inside of her lip, which he knows she only does when she's trying not to cry or smile. It might be both right now. "We can't fucking break up, Rach. We _can't_."

She looks down for a second, and she doesn't know when he took her hand. She has no clue when that happened. He's running his thumb over her knuckles, and she knows they're not breaking up. She thinks she's an idiot for ever saying they were done in the first place. How could she ever think it?

She doesn't say anything for a while, and he thinks that he's going to have to break into song or fucking get down on his knees and beg her, and he'll do it if he has to. He doesn't care. He's not too proud to admit that he needs her.

But then she moves closer to him, shuffling on her knees until she's straddling his lap, and he's totally shocked and all he can do is rest his hands on her sides to steady her as she takes his face in her hands.

"Stop being an idiot," she says. It's half-teasing, but half-warning, and he sighs in relief. He just nods. "And I'll stop being a bitch."

"You're _not_ a bitch," he says seriously. "I'm sorry I said that."

"I'm sorry I didn't hear you out," she says quietly. But he's finding it really, really hard to concentrate, because now he sees that his tee shirt is _all_ she's wearing, and her hands are running through his 'hawk. "I do trust you, I do. I just...I got all insecure, and that's not your fault. You've really changed, and it's not fair of me to imply otherwise."

His heart is beating in his ears. He makes a promise to himself to never make her doubt him again.

"I love you, Rachel. So fucking much." She just kisses him, and as amazing as that is, her pressed against him, he can't let it go. "I really, really need you to say it back right now."

She grins and runs her nails over his scalp. "I love you too, Noah. So fucking much."

He doesn't think he's ever smiled so wide. He's never, ever heard her say that word before. He remembers that day, when he promised he'd make her say it someday. He didn't really think it'd actually happen, and he's tried.

This seems really fitting, her saying it right now.

"You should go," she says against his lips. "My dads'll kill you."

His hands slip beneath her shirt and she sucks in a breath when they travel up her back. "I'll leave before they're up."

"Risky."

"Don't care."

"Noah," she says, smiling as she pulls away from him. He looks at her questioningly, as if to ask if she's really going to kick him out and deprive them both of what he knows is going to be amazing make up sex. "We have to be quiet."

He lays her on her back, but not before pulling the shirt up over her head. "Baby, I plan on making that as difficult as possible."

----

The first glee rehearsal of junior year, Puck walks into the room and sees that everyone else is already there. They all look at him like he's some kind of saviour or something, and he doesn't know what's going on.

Until he sees that Rachel is standing next to the piano, in front of Mr. Schuester. A quick glance to Kurt and it's very clear that they all think Puck is going to reign Rachel in and calm her down or something.

The truth is, he's come to find this whole diva act really fucking hot. What's sexier than seeing his girl fighting for what she wants?

"Mr. Schuester," she says in that tone she always uses when she completely disagrees with him. "Don't roll your eyes at me. I _saw_ that."

"Rachel, I'm..."

"I'm not finished," she points out sternly. Puck smiles. "I understand that last year, the bulk of our male soloing was done by Finn, with the exception of a few numbers during which Artie displayed his impeccable vocal talent."

"Thank you, Rachel," Artie says, smiling from his place. She grins back at him. Puck just crosses his arms. He's got no idea what she's up to.

"However, I have spent all summer working on a few numbers with Noah that I truly believe we could, and _should_, fold into our repertoire. The more members we showcase, the better. You know that. And Noah has a beautiful singing voice. He could blow people away with his vocals. I should know. I've helped him excel."

"Rachel, you're talking like I said no to this. I never did. Frankly, I barely thought about glee club all summer, until about two weeks ago," Mr. Schuester says.

Puck grimaces. Not the right thing to say. Rachel gasps, like, _gasps_, and takes a step backwards like this is the absolute worst thing she's ever heard.

"_Mr. Schuester_..."

"Hey, Rach," Puck says. When she spins around and looks at him, it's clear she didn't know he was there until he spoke up. "Let's just show them what we've been working on."

She smiles all wide and he winks at her, reaching for the acoustic guitar in the room. She turns back to Mr. Schue with a smug look on her face, and he just shakes his head and gestures for her to take the floor.

She glances at Noah, who's sitting next to her with his guitar on his lap, and she thinks that it's so nice to have someone on your side, no matter what.

"I honestly thought you'd like, calm her down or something," Santana says, trying to make herself seem completely disinterested. "Not encourage her."

"It's true," Artie chimes in. "On occasion, I fear for my life when she gets like this."

Puck laughs and shakes his head. "She looks pretty calm to me." Her jaw drops (everyone else laughs) when he smacks her behind as she walks past where he sits. "Let's do this, babe."

It's not that she can't believe he did it (honestly, she's rarely ever really surprised by anything he does anymore) but there's a teacher in the room, not to mention almost all their friends. She shoots him a glare for good measure.

But then he starts playing guitar, and her heart does this crazy thing in her chest, and she almost misses her cue because she's thinking about how much she loves him.

He listens to her sing the first verse, and he thinks it's funny that no one's realized that the reason he and Rachel work together is because he doesn't tell her not to be crazy. He doesn't try to reign her in, and yeah, sometimes he does encourage her. But he doesn't ever _ask_ her to change, because she's never _asked_ that of him. If he changes, it's on his own. He might do it because of her, but not because she tells him to. He does it because it makes him a better boyfriend. And a better person, or whatever.

And besides, she gets this little smile on her face when they harmonize together, and he thinks that no matter what, they just work well together.

Later that night, when she's laying on her stomach on his bed, flipping through her history text, and he's lazily strumming his guitar and occasionally humming a melody, she looks up at him and can't help but smile. She sits up, closing her text before tossing it on the floor. He looks at her like she's nuts when she takes the guitar from his hands and leans it against the chair in the room.

But the look on her face is the one she always gets when she wants to make out. So he grins back, and when she moves towards him, he lays back on his pillows.

Maybe it's a Wednesday, and maybe they should both be studying, but he's not about to complain when she kisses him.

"Noah?"

"Hmm." His lips brush against her cheek and he tucks a piece of her hair behind her ear.

"Thank you for sticking up for me today," she says quietly.

He laughs softly and shakes his head at her. "Any time, babe."

She kisses him because she knows he's telling her the truth.

_**-Fin-**_


End file.
